Name: WTF is Kanye West Doing???
Uploaded: 2025-03-27T18:30:41.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'WTF is Kanye West Doing???' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-03-27. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'WTF is Kanye West Doing???' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-03-27. Transcript available.

- So we're in the spa and we're in the steam room
and he looked at my
and he goes, and he kind of almost died laughing.
- Why?
- He goes, "It's so cute."
And he started laughing.
- Well, he doesn't have a big .
- No, he didn't say it was small.
- Oh, he just liked it.
- My is cute.
Minion.
- Minion.
- You've seen it.
- I have.
- It's the best, dude.
If it were to make a noise, that's the noise.
- What does it do when it sees a woman?
- Oh, okay, okay, okay.
- Like that, like that, like that.
Like that, dude.
And it's like, he's so happy.
And I can get hard now just talking to people on the phone.
- No.
- It's a miracle, yeah.
- Me?
Do you ever do that with a woman?
- No, all right.
But what if I put on a female voice?
- Huh?
- What if when you call me and I'm like, "Hey, bye."
- No, no, no, no, no.
'Cause I know it's you, dude.
- I'm gonna do it.
- You've tried before.
It doesn't work.
- Pisses me off.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
He's the only one in a tirade about on Twitter, by the way.
It's unbelievable.
- What?
- He was, Kanye was like, you tell me if you're a hermaphrodite,
you wouldn't stick your penis in your own vagina.
And I really had to think about it.
I was like, that's actually a great point.
- Well, you would have to bend it, like Beckham.
- Yeah.
- You know what I mean?
And I don't know if my-
- I was literally about to say bend it like Beckham.
We're on the same page.
- Really?
We're on the same page.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Look, if I'm a hermaphrodite, oh, if a hermaphrodite
only dates women, that's a hermaphrodike.
That was his first joke.
- Pretty good.
- Yeah.
- Yeah, play on words.
- But the other one was, the other one was,
you're telling me if you're a hermaphrodite,
you wouldn't try to stick your penis in your own vagina.
Then he said, I thought about it, I'm no longer a Nazi.
He literally wrote, I no longer am a Nazi.
- That's so funny, dude.
- He thought about it.
- He thought about it, wow.
- Well, you gotta think about it.
- Because of Adam Sandler.
- Because of Adam Sandler.
'Cause Adam Sandler gave him a tribute to the 50th SNL.
Is that what it was?
- He probably just talked to him privately.
- Hey, buddy, you can't talk about me like that.
You gotta lay off the Jews.
- Yeah.
- Lay off the Jews.
- But if there was like a Hollywood president of Jews,
Adam would be it.
- Sandler's the best.
- Yeah, he's the best.
- He is maybe the coolest, most funny, chill,
down to earth dude I've ever met in comedy.
And I'm not even kidding.
- At his level, like Chappelle is very sweet and dope too.
But like Sandler's, Sandler still has that boyish,
like he's like, oh, hey buddy, it's sweet.
It's like, I don't, I can't even describe it.
- That's when I, remember I was with that sexy lady
and we walked by, I told you that.
- Yeah.
- And Sandler was there with his mom
and he looked at my girl and goes, funny guy.
- Ugh.
- And that's, you know what he's doing?
- Yeah.
- Alive.
- And that's something.
- Don't say it.
- And I don't even have to say it
because you know what I'm saying.
- It's something that these guys never do.
- No, no, him specifically.
You've never given me an alley-oop.
- Bro, he's not even in the game.
- I know, that's why.
I think he's got to learn how to play the game first.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Get on the team.
- No, I-
- Get on the team and then maybe you can throw me an alley-oop.
- Bro, he's, tryouts are in a week.
- Yeah, yeah.
- Let me tell you something.
You're walking down the street, you pass Carlos.
- Yeah.
- And Carlos goes, funny guy.
The girl's gonna be like, ew, what was that?
- Oh, that's true, yeah, yeah.
- That guy's got to go to jail.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- You know him?
- Yeah, why do you know him?
- Yeah, I don't know if we can.
- Yeah, yeah, that's what it is.
- Wait, Bob.
- How about this?
When you see Bobby in public from now on with a woman,
you do not recognize him, you ask for change.
You act homeless and you ask for change.
- Yeah.
- Like they pass each other.
Carlos.
- When you called me last night, where were you?
It sounded like you were at a party or something.
- Yeah, he told me you were at a nightclub
or some shit last night.
10 o'clock.
- You know where the fuck you were, pal.
- No, I was with Ian Fidance at Fred 62's.
- Oh, okay.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- That's still open?
- Yeah, they close at one.
- Wow, I thought that closed down.
- It was pretty good last night.
- Was it?
'Cause they fell off for a little while.
- They did, yeah.
But it's a cute little, it's so many hipsters.
- Is House of Pies still open across the street?
- No, I haven't seen that open.
- It is?
- But Fred 62's is all these like, oh.
- Oh, dude.
- Hash brown, hash brown.
- What do you mean?
That's like your favorite people.
- No, dude, I'm fucking.
Dude, I'm Norm.
- Yeah, thank you.
- No, I'm Norm.
- No, you're not, dude.
- I'm Norm.
- You're a pretentious artist, you're a pretentious.
- You always want to go to Swingers.
I don't want to go there.
- Yeah, Swingers is low rent.
Swingers is basic.
- It's still like cool though.
- No, it's not.
It hasn't been cool in a decade.
- Yeah, tattooed Mexicans.
You love them.
- I fucking love tattooed Mexicans.
- I know, exactly.
That's why you like to go there.
- I won't leave home without them.
They're my American Express.
- Right, but I haven't been to fucking Fred 62's
in like years.
I'm a Norm's, Mel's kind of a guy.
- Mel's sucks.
- I know, but that's what, and look at that.
- Swingers used to be the shit.
That's probably me in the background
before I lost the weight.
- Yeah.
- Wait, no, listen, this is a crazy moment.
We were shooting over there one time and I go,
Al Madrigal goes, hey, let's go get House of Pies
for lunch.
You know, 'cause we were like skipping the crew lunch.
And I was like, I'm starving, dude.
Let's go over there.
I was like, fuck yeah.
And he goes, oh my God, my wallet's in my trailer.
And I looked down at my phone.
I'm like, my wallet's in my fucking trailer too.
I was like, shit.
So we're asking people, does anybody have cash?
Da, da, da, da.
And everyone's like, I don't have cash.
So I call House of Pies and she's gotta be still there.
It's the old Asian woman that answered the phone.
- Oh, love her.
- And she goes, she's like, hey, how the Pies?
And I was like, hey, do you do Apple Pay?
And she's like, Apple Pay?
Yeah, we tell, yeah, Apple Pay.
Yeah, Apple, yeah.
And I was like, I'm not making this up.
I swear to God, I know this is such an Andrew Santino bit
for the show.
But I was like, yeah, Apple, so you take Apple, yeah?
She's like, yeah, Apple Pay, yeah, yeah, Apple, yeah.
- I know what she's saying.
- Dude, I walk in and I'm like, we order the food.
I go to tap, I'm like, where's Apple Pay?
She's like, no, Apple Pay, Apple Pay, Apple.
And she's pointing to Apple Pies.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Apple Pies.
- Yeah, yeah, they've done that.
- Bro, I felt so dumb and Magical's like,
you fucking idiot.
- Yeah, yeah.
- We ordered all this food and this woman said Apple Pay.
You think she said Apple Pay?
I'm like, it sounds the same.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- She literally goes, yeah, Apple Pay, Apple Pay, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'm like, okay, they take it.
This is like a South Park episode.
- It's really funny, yeah.
- Welcome to Apple Pay, take Apple Pay.
- Yeah.
- Dude, that cracked me up.
By the way, we only got the food because Al was able to,
that guy, Al is able to figure his way out of everything.
- So how'd he, what'd he do?
- He found a dude to loan him cash.
- In the restaurant?
- He like knew a guy.
And I was like, I don't even know that guy.
He's like, oh, I'll Venmo him or get him back or whatever
to give him cash to pay for the thing.
- Wow.
- Al is a magician.
- Dude, Al is, he can get into anything too.
- Yeah, dude, he's a magician.
- You know what I mean?
Like he's like a sitcom guy now.
- He hit, you know what he used to tell me on the set
when we worked together?
He used to go, dude, I'll tell you what I'm gonna do.
I'm gonna be in like a fifth, sixth
on the call sheet kind of guy, I'm gonna cruise in.
I'm gonna go, that's what you guys are having?
And then get out of there.
And I was like, yeah.
And he goes, watch.
And he did.
Now he's on George Lopez's show, right?
He's been on for years and he's cruising.
- It's incredible.
- He loves it.
- It's his paycheck, paycheck, paycheck.
- And for people that don't know,
one of our good buddies, a comic, comedy store guy,
has the worst blowups of anybody on earth.
- Al?
- On stage, he fucking would blow up on audience.
- Oh, I know, I know.
- Oh my God.
Someone would talk, he'd be like, lady?
- Yeah.
- And then it would just spill out.
- The rage.
- The rage would spill out of him.
- Yeah.
- And look at how sweet he looks.
You would never guess.
- Do you get rage?
I've been getting rage lately.
- When I was young, I did.
But now I just ignore people talk.
If they're yelling, I just don't, it didn't happen.
- Like when a group of people walk out during a set up.
- People did that to you?
- Yeah, last night, I go, where are you going?
And they turn around, we gotta go to the bathroom.
- Yeah.
- During a set up.
- Well.
- I get so mad.
And then it's like, or they fall asleep.
- Oh, I've heard.
- You get late last night spots at the OR.
There's always like a heroin nod lady.
-
- Where she's just like, you know what I mean?
In and out of consciousness.
I hate it.
- I don't like.
- Go home!
- Or itchy people.
You see a lot of like.
- Oh yeah, yeah.
- You see a lot of itchy people in the store late at night.
- Yeah.
- Peace, bro.