Name: Monday Morning Podcast 6-3-19
Uploaded: 2019-06-03T19:20:36.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Monday Morning Podcast 6-3-19' from Bill Burr on Comedy Buff. Published 2019-06-03. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Monday Morning Podcast 6-3-19' from Bill Burr on Comedy Buff. Published 2019-06-03. Transcript available.

Monday Morning Podcast 6-3-19

hey what's going on it's bill burr and it's time for the monday morning podcast
for monday june
3rd 2019 what's going on how are you hey um i don't know what to tell you i'm
here in new york
city we start the we start the movie tomorrow so uh you know little i always
get antsy before
i do those things but then once i do a take or two then i'm just kind of i'm
fine so and also today is
my beautiful wife's birthday which is a nice distraction the family's in town i'm
no longer
lonely uh they came in yesterday it was awesome we have a nice little space
here so i play this
game either where i chase my daughter around or you know she does like the pony
ride but like
i used to do you know how you do the pony ride where you're crawling on all all
fours but my
left knee's too up so i was like all right get on my back and we'll do it this
way and then that morphed
into let's do the fast pony ride so now i have to run with her on my back and
uh yeah it's just there's
no way there's no way around it i'm just old no matter which way i try to
adjust it she wears me out
but um yeah it's awesome that they're they're here in town so anyways let's
talk let's talk stanley cup
final hockey your boston bruins are up two games to one two games away from
winning the stanley cup
which would be the seventh in franchise history and uh they're two games away
but that is a long
long ways away it's been a very strange series so far it's been a series of
dominance whoever wins the
game that night seems to have dominated like um i remember when the bruins won
game one all my buddies
would text me going st louis can't play with us you know they were texting emojis
of it's gonna be a
sweep and um i saw enough in the first period of uh of that game i just knew
that you know they're a big
fast team and i this is gonna be a war this is gonna be a war so last night was
a weird game
i don't know uh it's a little frustrating i gotta tell you i was furious after
game two um not because
we lost i've just never seen a bruins team look the other way uh after that
amount of liberties are
taken after the whistle you know this is this new period where they've all the
i wish all the people
that wanted to get fighting out of the game actually watched this series you
know because that's what i
always said it's like they all these people were advocating you know getting
the fighting out of
the game so they could continue to not watch hockey and like there's nothing
wrong with the way st louis
is playing but the way that they're playing back in the day you know we would
have sent a goon out on
the ice to settle everything down but now you there's none of that anymore so
the game that they're playing
which is essentially they play the lock the whatever the left wing lock or
whatever
and then they're coming down the ice and running our goaltender and back in the
day if you ran the
goaltender the second you did it you just dropped the gloves because you knew
somebody was going to
come and try to beat the out of you but that can't happen now so i guess what
needs to happen is then
the ref needs to take his whistle out of his fucking slacks and you got to
punish the team but
they've kind of let it go and when they have taken the whistle out they kind of
have matching
penalties which has been really frustrating but my buddy joe bartnick told me
he said don't worry
all the bruins have to do is keep playing their game and they'll be able to get
past it but i am by
no means comfortable um i'm psyched we're up two games to one but i am you know
it was so weird i mean
that game was essentially five to two it wasn't you know it was an empty netter
and then a garbage time
fucking bullshit goal in the end um it was basically a five to two game and i
was really baffled how we
were how we somehow scored five goals when i felt we played the game eighty
percent in our own end
and um that isn't what i like and the way st louis plays is you got to get up
on them early because
they you know if they get up a goal or two they're just gonna fucking smother
you with that boring ass
fucking trap defense which i don't understand why you know you saw the nba they
you know when guys got
too big and too fast the game got boring so certain defenses were made illegal
and for some reason uh
i don't know they opted to get rid of the red line like that was supposed to
fix the problem i don't
know what but um you know i don't know all i know is back in the day the game
that st louis
is playing they would have to be a way tougher team to play it um like who's
that guy number seven patrick
maroon i mean back then that guy would have got the kicked out well i mean i'm
saying he would lose
the fight i'm making that assumption but someone would have jumped him um you
know with the
bullshit that he's doing but uh that's just kind of not the way the game is and
i gotta tell you as a
bruins fan 40 years it's been a i i've never seen you know we were never the
fast team we were usually
the team doing the so um i know there's a lot of st louis fans who do what game
are you
watching it's like whatever we're doing is the reaction to what you guys are
doing you know what
you're doing you saw the san jose charts sharks the last series by the end of
the series the third
of their team was gone from the way that you guys are playing and you know let's
be honest man it's
now you know we'll call it chippy so um i i still think that we i really
believe in my heart of hearts
that we're the better team but i still don't think that you know that means we're
gonna win you know
when a team is gonna play like a physical game like that because guys end up
getting hurt you
know what i mean i mean it's just it's just the way it is so which i don't have
a problem with that
because the bruins have played like that for ever it's just weird now um having
watched hockey as
long as i have to then not see somebody skate out and beat the out of that guy
so he tones it down
and everybody else relaxes it's really been a uh a weird thing but um having
said that you know the
atmosphere was great last night you know before the game and just the game just
got out of hand but
it was cool to see all those st louis fans that excited it really is a big time
hockey fan uh hockey
town as much as their baseball team does so well um you know they're definitely
diehard fans if you're
a st louis fan you are a diehard fan so you've been through it so um we'll see
we'll see what happens
um i don't know it's kind of just seems like it's going to be a back and forth
so far obviously this
will be huge if we can somehow break their serve you know and win back to back
here and go home three
games to one but uh if they tie it up to two i just i just see this thing going
seven um
all right i just hope no more of our players get fucking hurt um and if they do
i think it might be
time to fucking go down to wherever our fucking farm team is and just bring a
fucking goon up and
clean somebody's fucking clock like they did the other day and leave some teeth
on the fucking ice to be
like you know because like i said the refs aren't fucking doing anything
um matching penalties is the best we seem to get um so anyways haven't said
that speaking of as
diehard as st louis blues fans are um i watched a little bit of the nba finals
and the fact that
they're calling drake a super fan it's just like i i you know i know it's a
business i know it's about
money but that guy is the furthest thing from a super fan a super fan is there
through thick
and thin where the is this guy been okay what kills me is up until like two
years ago their super fan i
hope i say his name or is that nav batia is that how you say his name no
disrespect to that guy i love
that guy that guy has been to every single home game in the toronto raptors
history
he travels on the road dude remember we played them in the playoffs he came to
the boston garden and he
was such a good guy that you know even though he was wearing all his gear and
he's
such a happy good he's everything a fan should be his behavior and all that he
gets no screen time
all of a sudden drake comes in who's a super bandwagon fan to the point he has
to wear a
fucking he's got to wear a fucking wristband or a headband on his fucking arm
because he's got tattoos
of the jerseys of the players on the other fucking team and i i just like that
guy is literally
like the worst representation of a sports fan you could possibly have standing
up the whole game
you know when you sit behind you know that fucking every time somebody takes a
three-pointer
they got to stand up or stick their arm up with three fingers in the air like
everybody doesn't know
i understand if it's a big three-pointer and especially nowadays when both
teams seem like
they're going to take 23 pointers a piece this guy's going to get up 20 times
in 48 minutes
as i'm trying to watch the game behind him um going on to the court getting
into the faces of players
having arguments with them and he is being like champion like he's just this
amazing fan i even
saw like stephen a smith well who's kidding who i absolutely love stephen a smith
but that guy does
get a little enamored with famous people he really does because there's no way
if that was some plumber
and he was getting in the face of steph curvy and that other guy who kicks you
in the balls
accidentally 58 times when he takes a jump shot you know if he was getting in
the face and he was just
some regular guy stephen a smith would you know you're a plumber sit your ass
down what are you
doing learn how to behave yourself in public he would go that way but because
it's drake you know some
auto-tune singer who evidently has a cell phone now all of a sudden this guy
can go on the court
um i don't know i think drake has that performer disease you know where even if
it isn't their show
he has to somehow be he doesn't know how to behave if if if like when he walks
into an arena
you know it's just sit down and you have some popcorn and watch some of the
best athletes on the
planet the guy's literally running his yap like it's like drake how many points
do you have how
many assists what you're not in the game i know you're wearing half a uniform
so you might get a
little confused i i just i don't understand it's i don't know it's nauseating
behavior i hate it back
in the day when i was a celtics fan and the amount of times they would cut to
jack nicholson
it's like i don't give a what this isn't a jack nicholson movie and plus when
you look back and
you see how many hall of famers were on the court i know he's part of the
atmosphere and diane cannon
and it was the whole la thing whatever i guess they cut the famous people
whatever but you know
all of a sudden they're like making plays they're in like the huddle and drake's
sitting there giving
the guy a back rub i mean it's just it's steven a smith sitting there going
like if you don't like it
shut the man up with your performance um oh so so then if if any of us regular
people go out and
get courtside seats like it's okay for us to do what drake's doing i can just
go up to a coach and
start giving them a back rub i can start yelling at a player and and picking lint
out of their hair
i can do that like that's okay you know if the other team doesn't like it then
shut me up and
score more points um like i said i love steven a smith but i disagree and i
think he's just getting a
little enamored with this guy's fame i uh it's ridiculous behavior he's a total
bandwagon fan
with tattoos of other players from the other team on his arm the out of here if
you
want to see a super fan it's that nav patia guy okay that guy that guy is an
ambassador that guy is
a tremendous tremendous human being all right and i'm sure when he goes to
karaoke he they don't have
to turn on the auto tune for him all right um anyways how far into this why
does this screen shut off
huh i never know where i'm at okay 13 minutes in i got my new recorder here
everybody that