Name: Thursday Afternoon Monday Morning Podcast 9-21-23 w. JOE BARTNICK | Bill Burr
Uploaded: 2023-09-21T12:47:28.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Thursday Afternoon Monday Morning Podcast 9-21-23 w. JOE BARTNICK | Bill Burr' from Bill Burr on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-09-21. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Thursday Afternoon Monday Morning Podcast 9-21-23 w. JOE BARTNICK | Bill Burr' from Bill Burr on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-09-21. Transcript available.

Thursday Afternoon Monday Morning Podcast 9-21-23 w. JOE BARTNICK | Bill Burr

All right. Hey, what's going on? It's Bill Burr and it's time for the Thursday
afternoon just before Friday, Monday morning podcast.
And I'm just checking in on you. Oh, my God. Look, we're trying to fucking warm
me up here with the blue, with the blue.
Anyway, we got a guest this week. It could have been like bluer. You know what
I mean?
They're kind of like this isn't baby blue. This is sort of like, is it going to
rain?
Blue. My guest this week has a special that he did with ATC called A Killing in
Chicago that has been killing on social media.
Clips going up, getting a million and a half views. The man, the myth, the Rose
Bowl, tailgate legend, the one and only Mr. Joe Bartnick.
What's up, Bill? Yeah, we are here to promote. I'll tell you what's up. We're
here to promote your special and you got a minor's cough or something.
What's happened with you? Yeah, I've been sick for a couple of weeks, but it's
not COVID.
COVID I can handle. I've had COVID like three times. This is worse.
Oh, all right. Well, where, what funny bone did you just come back from?
I just did. What comedy condo?
That's what my wife is claiming. I'm like, no, I was in a nice hotel. I got
sick at, well, I kind of went, I don't know, Steve Byrne, the goddamn comedy
jam for the Lemieux benefit.
So it was a lot of fun. I actually took it easy. I took it easy until the plane
ride home. You know how they simmer at like 10,000 feet and everyone's ears go?
I went deaf for like a week. I still can't really hear out of this one side of
my head.
Okay.
Yeah.
There's a lot there. All right. So you were at the goddamn comedy jam in
Pittsburgh.
Guess what song I sang?
Oh, I heard. Dirty Deeds.
Oh, okay.
And I heard you killed it.
I did well. After my last debacle, trying to do the gambler at the All Things
Comedy.
Oh, no. If you can't really carry a tune, you need something up-tempo.
I can't carry a tune in a suitcase.
Yeah.
Let alone the fact that everybody knows like the gambler, like the five lines.
Everybody knows.
Yeah, you got to-
There's like a book. It's like a Bob Dylan song before and after all those
words, and I didn't know any of them.
He called me the morning. Hey, you were still doing a show. I'm like, oh, yeah.
It was a debacle. You were there.
Was I there for that one?
Yeah, you were there. We did it like Coyote Ugly style, like on top of a bar.
And like the Chicago Blackhawks were there heckling me. It was one of the worst-
I wasn't there for that.
Okay.
No, I would have remembered that. The Blackhawks were heckling me. Well, then
you're still killed in your own way, right?
Well, Dave Boland and his guys, so they're good people. Yeah, but it was a
disaster. I'm not going to sugarcoat how awful it was.
I didn't get it done. I have no one to blame but myself, and all I can do is,
you know-
You go up to the podium after a loss, and you take it like a man. Bill, I had
to take that one like a man. It was terrible.
You don't blame your teammates.
No. I'm not a finger pointer.
Yes. Finger pointers. That's a big Joey B thing. Finger pointers never win
championships.
They don't. You see a quarterback coming off the field pointing fingers, never
have a ring.
The guys that-
What about Tom Brady? He used to rip into guys.
Did he point fingers running off the field, though?
I think he was more like this. He karate chopped.
That's less of a- It's kind of like a overall you, not you.
It's not accusatory.
Yes. It could be the offensive line. It could be the ref. It could be Belichick.
It could be himself.
And the murderer is that man right there.
It's not- You ran the wrong route.
I don't know if he did that. He just sort of would like lean over and would
sort of like, yeah.
I definitely see- I can see that.
But anyway, I have to be honest with you. I am so proud of this special.
To have my name on it, I just feel like it's this-
Guest starring in it as well.
Oh, yeah. I do a little sketch in there.
That I just, when I watch the clips, it's like, this could have came out today.
This could have came out, it's like 20 years ago.
It's like timeless material.
And then with the mustache and the fucking, the Russian dictator fucking do you
got going.
And it just looks like somebody's linebacker's coach went up there and did
stand-up.
And I'm so thrilled the way it's performed.
If you guys just want unfiltered, like, what, you know, somebody just going up
there saying what they're thinking,
which I think is really something to protect at this point.
Everybody's so fucking afraid that, you know, you're going to say something.
But I kind of feel like that's even over.
I think everyone's like, all right, all right, like, what did we just do for,
like, the last fucking five years?
We let these fucking fascist nerds who acted like they were cool people, but
they weren't.
They just had their own fuck.
They ended up being just like the people they were trying to stop, but, like,
they had, like, they were sort of warm and fuzzy about it.
Did I lose you on that one?
A little bit.
But you know what?
The thing is, is thank you for the compliment, but also watching you all these
years, you're the one of the most fearless guys out there.
So how can I sit next to you?
It's like batting behind DiMaggio.
How can I be in the on-deck circle and be like, eh, I'm not going to do it.
My shit jokes are pretty fearless, Joe.
No.
I get out there and I sling it.
But seriously, you say what you—
Right from the fucking anus.
You have no fear on what you say, and I think that's the whole key of comedy.
If you're scared, don't say it.
No, because my whole thing is I'm not being malicious.
I'm being silly.
So if you want to take it serious, take it seriously.
But, I mean, that's not my fucking fault that you decided to go that route.
And if you don't like it, there is literally 10,000 fucking stand-up specials
that you could watch.
10,000 other ones.
Did my arms disappear into the fucking—
But that's me, though, as far as, you know, I'm not malicious in anything I say,
you know?
I know, but you know what I loved that night when you did the thing?
When you did the special, you still hadn't got your back surgery, right?
No, that's why if you look close enough, you can see my dead leg.
Yeah.
So you were playing hurt.
It was like deep into the fucking Stanley Cup run.
And you went out there like Messier.
And I was getting sick because I couldn't go to the after party.
I was all run down, and I flew into Chicago.
Me and Verzi surprised you.
And you went out on the first one.
And I remember Bertolino was going like, dude, we got it.
We got it.
So we were like, Joe, we got it.
You were like, I just don't want to let you guys down.
Big fucking St. Bernard that you are.
And then the second one, dude, you went out.
There's something about like your—on the final one.
I just love the pacing of it, the confidence, you're seasoned and all of that.
And it's just such a—it reminded me of like the first time I saw you at the
punchline
when I remember just going like, this fucking guy, who is this guy?
This guy does not give a shit.
And it's like—it's kind of what I hope for in every comedian, regardless of
what style,
regardless of what their opinion is, what I hope every time I see a comic is
like,
just please just say what you want to say.
And how—but, you know, obviously don't—I mean, I don't want to listen to
some person
that's like, you know, being like, you know, actually going up there, being
fucking stupid.
But like, just being silly and having a good time.
I fucking love this special.
I love the way it looks.
You guys got to check it out.
We got—we've been doing how they knew the new ones come out.
You know, you put out a few clips, you get people excited.
Sort of like a stand-up trailer.
And then we should—I think we're going to have the whole thing up on our
YouTube channel
in August.
And this guy's going to be headlining around the country.
It's actually the middle of September.
Middle of September.
Because we're going to even it out with my week at XM Radio.
Beautiful.
It's your idea, the summer of Bartnick.
Summer of Bartnick.
How much more can you do for me, Bill?
Huh?
You got my dad to the Masters.
You got me a comedy special.
How much fun was that?
The Masters was incredible.
It was incredible.
Dude, the first day, I felt like I was at a Big Ten football game.
It was like so fucking cold.
And we're all dressed like we're going to see golf.
And then the next day, it was like, oh, it was like ungodly hot.
Actually, the next day wasn't that—it was actually a much better day.
But it's exactly what you look like on television.
It's that beautiful.
Yeah.
It really is.
Like that bridge, it's right there.
Amen Corner.
Yeah.
And all of that.
Yeah.
We always seem to end up on—was it 15?
It's a—it's got like the—most guys try to lay up right before it.
There's a—and there's a par three right after it.
I always forget if it's 15 or—if that's 15 and—I think that's 15 and 16,
because then
it's—no.
I think it's 14 and 15, because then it's 16, 17, 18.
I forget.
All I know, that was the—
The numbers.
Yeah, whatever.
Whatever.
But you know what I did?
I—before we went there, I watched Jack Nicholson.
Jack Nicholson, they pick it up on—it's on YouTube, the full thing on his
back nine
on the final day when he picked up—I mean, he's like down like four or five
strokes, and
it was just—that's that one where he—he watched awards with the putter.
Yes, sir!
Yeah.
It was just—I watched that one.
Jack Nicholson.
Jack Nicholson.
What'd I say?
Nicholson?
Yeah.
I always do that.
Jack Nicholson.
Thank you, Adam.
Here's Johnny coming up 18.
As an over-the-top—
Whenever you see me lining up a pot, whatever the fuck you think—he's—that's
probably
the most frightening he ever was.
Oh, the shot—yeah, he's nuts.
Yeah.
Absolutely nuts.
It's scary.
My daughter just had to watch that for film school.
I'm like, how cool is your—I'm paying for this college?
You're watching The Shining for fun?
This is great.
I know.
And there's something about the—what's the woman who—and I just spaced out.
Shelley Duvall.
Shelley Duvall is like, you feel for her, and she's also fucking annoying.
Yeah.
I mean, you don't want her dead, but you want her, like, to go away.
Yeah.
Like, just get in the hatchback and just let Jack go fucking crazy, because it
just—you
know what it is?
I think when I watch it, I kind of—in her, I see myself sometimes when I'm
just fucking
playing the victim and being helpless.
There's just something about it where she'd have a fucking bat.
He's a writer!
How tough can he be?
Just fucking hit him in the head!
It's not like he's a fucking plumber going nuts.
He fucking writes shit.
Right.
Sitting in a typewriter.
Good Lord.
He's got carpal tunnel.
He can't even—how does he even swing his axe?
How does he hold the fucking handle?
By the way, dude, tonight and tomorrow, there's a double feature at the New
Beverly Cinema,
Clint Eastwood.
Oh.
Fistful of dollars and something else.
It's not the good, the bad, and the ugly.
There's some—I mean, that thing, I'm telling you, it's—that fucking movie
theater.
The films that they have coming up, they got 3 o'clock high.
Oh, whoa.
Yeah.
Playing at 3 p.m. because everything Tarantino does is fucking cool, and then
he adds another
layer of fucking cool to it.
My favorite Clint Cheap Western, though, is Hang Him High.
That's a great one.
Are we doing that?
And he's like, yeah.
Next time you hang him in, do it right.
Yeah.
I can't do a Clint.
No, that's a good one.
Oh, I just—I mean, Clint is just the best.
He really is.
He kills me.
Do you know the one that I—
Joe is a connoisseur of old television and old film.
Me, TV.
No, I was the Comedy and Magic, and I was the youngest comic, except for maybe
Suba, by
like 25 years, and even those guys don't watch Me, TV Plus.
Me, TV Plus.
I could be 70.
Heroes and icons.
He's got me taping Kojak.
I watched Kojak last night, and it was so cool.
Like, I put it on.
I was like, ah, is Nia going to like this?
