Name: Bill Burr - Dr. Laura and the N Word
Uploaded: 2010-08-18T13:31:17.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr - Dr. Laura and the N Word' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2010-08-18. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr - Dr. Laura and the N Word' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2010-08-18. Transcript available.

Oh, you know what someone sent me?
Somebody just asked me if I want to do an interview on that Dr. Laura.
First of all, I've never heard of her.
Evidently, she's been doing it for a while.
Is she like the poor man's Dr. Joyce brothers?
I never saw Dr. Laura.
I'm going to go with Dr. Laura for the block.
Dr. Laura, thank you for coming back.
How are you?
Something fucking psychologically funny.
They say that 80% of people in Wisconsin eat too much cheese.
Well, let's see.
There is a lot of cheese in Wisconsin.
I'm sorry.
I just had a flashback to Hollywood Squares.
So anyways, Dr. Laura evidently dropped the N-word like 58 fucking times.
So I was like, holy shit, how did I miss out on this?
And then I watched it and all she was really guilty of, she was guilty of being
an old white
person making a fucking old reference to Def Comedy Jam on HBO, like the last
two seasons.
And she was just going like, what?
You listen to, you know, you put on the HBO.
You know, you watch the comedy shows and it's N-word, N-word, N-word, N-word, N-word.
You know, and then just people just go, just because now she's being racist,
they don't even look at the context.
She was saying that when you watch Def Comedy Jam the last two seasons, that is
what you heard.
That is what you heard.
I used to do a joke.
I didn't say the N-word.
What I would say was my impression of Def Comedy Jam.
This is the last two seasons.
I'm not talking about the early seasons when it was Martin and all those guys,
but the later
seasons when they were scraping the bottom of the barrel like white comedy, you
know, when
just every fucking accountant who just threw his sport coat on and went up and
went, what's
the deal with airplane food?
Black stand-up comedy got there in like 94, 95.
And my joke of the Def Jam impression was, white people, pussy, peace.
That was every set that I, that's all it was.
You ever see a white guy laying in bed?
You know, motherfucking black people, we lay in the bed, we lay in the motherfucking
bed.
It was ridiculous, all right?
And then it was peppered with the fucking N-word all the way throughout.
Fucking ridiculous.
So you can't expect some 60-year-old white lady to be able to fucking process
that.
To get, like, I guess my only way to explain it is that's sort of like the
black word for
dude.
You ever talk to a surfer or somebody like that?
Dude, I was sitting there, dude, like Bobby Kelly.
Dude, fucking dude, man, you know, dudes, you're being dudes, dude.
I mean, you ever just, as a white person, stand on a subway platform and there's
some
dude from fucking around the way and it is literally every other goddamn word
and you're
just sitting there like, you're just like in awe.
Like, how to fucking use any word that much in a goddamn sentence?
That's all she was talking about.
She wasn't condoning it.
She wasn't saying it in a fucking racist way.
It's ridiculous.
And then fucking the fat boss hog there, Al Sharpton, comes, you know, waddling
out behind
his fake fire hydrant.
And then I was advocating they got to take advertisement away.
For what?
For what?
Because she made an old reference?
I fuck, I hate that.
I hate how, how, uh, there's no context anymore.
People don't look the context.
They just, they just have a list of words.
You said this and anybody who uses that word, regardless of the fucking context,
means X, Y,
and Z.
You're in the clan.
It's fucking bullshit.
It's like when I was up in Seattle and, uh, I don't want to burn this joke, but
it's
a joke that's on my next special where I was talking about how, uh, I'll give
you a little
bit of it.
This will be a little teaser for my special.
It's basically how anytime you do anything like sensitive as, as a straight guy,
your
friends are always like, what are you a fag?
And I was making fun of the homophobia, but because I used the word fag, these
fucking four
gay dudes in the upper deck just stood up and they go fucking homophobe mid
joke and
storm out of the fucking place.
Fortunately, my ears are shot from drumming.
I couldn't hear what they said.
I kind of wish I did because it could have been a great moment if I could have
got them
to stop for a second before they fucking sashayed out the goddamn door.
Um, well, that was homophobic right there.
You're saying we all sashayed.
Take a fucking joke, you dick.
You know, Jesus fucking Christ.
You don't sit around making fun of shit.
Ah, whatever.
That's what I'm talking about.
She's not, she's not guilty of anything.
You know, she's guilty of, of watching.
Def Jam and describing it 15 years after it went off the fucking air.
That's all she's guilty of doing.
And, uh, if I was a black comic, I would be fucking annoyed the same way I get
annoyed
when people make fun of standup comics in general.
And then whenever they do, they, they go, uh, you know, what's the deal with,
with airplane
food?
And they, they, they criticize comedians for some bad shit that awful comedians
did 15
years ago.
So there you go.
I don't even know why I fucking talk.
I just, I'm just, I don't know.
Al, what does Al Sharpton do?
That guy should be selling used cars.
I don't understand what he does other than get his hair relaxed every fucking
20 minutes.
Oh, you need to apologize for that.
We need to take the, the, the, the, the, the advertising away from your podcast.
There's no fucking advertising on here.
It's free.
All right, Alvin.
Um, anyways, let's plow ahead here.
Um, but you know, who am I as a fucking white person to fucking say that, you
know, who am
I to have a fucking opinion on that?
So, uh, how about, uh, so I don't offend anybody.
How about the African-American listeners?
Do you feel that, uh, what she, what she was saying?
Look it up, look it up on YouTube.
Um, and then look at all the brilliant comments underneath it.
And not to mention, I think a lot, uh, I don't know.
If you, if you go on YouTube, uh, I would be convinced that everybody around
the country
is saying what they thought Dr. Laura, uh, Laura was saying.
If you, if you go on YouTube, I don't give a fuck what video you look at.
You could look at, um, I don't know, guy dunks basketball.
And then you go underneath, it's going to be all be about fucking slavery.
Uh, you know, fucking getting Mexicans out of Arizona or illegals, whatever the
fuck
you want to, it's just, I don't know.
It's depressing.
YouTube, I just watched the videos and I try not to scroll down, you know, like
how I
try not to look at porno, try not to go to the free websites, but just fucking
thumb starts
quivering.
I got to click it.
And then I go down and then I, I'm reading it.
It's just, it's just fucking depressing.
Um, and this is what kills me.
Then she goes on and she fucking apologizes.
So now the fact that you fucking apologize, you're, you're giving validity to a
bullshit
point, uh, uh, um, uh, uh, a bullshit point.
Why would you apologize if you didn't mean it in a bad way?
You weren't, you were making a reference to fucking, uh, the last couple of
seasons of
deaf comedy, Jim.
Right.
Anybody, nothing crickets.
Ah, who gives a fuck.
Anyway.