Name: Bill Burr-The Green Hornet Movie
Uploaded: 2011-01-04T06:49:59.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr-The Green Hornet Movie' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2011-01-04. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr-The Green Hornet Movie' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2011-01-04. Transcript available.

What is that Seth Rogen?
Green Lantern?
Is that what it is?
One of those fringe superheroes?
I already don't like that movie, and I love Seth Rogen,
but I don't like that movie.
I don't want to watch a bumbling superhero.
Like, what is this gun?
Did I just almost shoot my foot off?
I want you to be the shit.
All right?
Why won't Hollywood show me a guy that makes me want to be that guy
like they used to back in the day?
I'm so sick of every—
They're even making superheroes, like, nerdy and unsure of themselves.
Spider-Man was never nerdy and unsure of himself.
He had a fucking smoking heart, tits and ass, raven-haired fucking beauty
that he was banging every night.
He wasn't afraid of shit.
They used to pretend to be nerds.
That was their alter ego, where they sat there, you know, Clark Kent.
Ooh, hey, where are you?
Like the white guy on all those Def Jam bits.
Peter Parker, you know, walking around with his stupid, you know,
getting yelled at by Jameson,
where he could have just shot some fucking cobwebs right into his goddamn mouth.
Now they got to make him every man.
I'm sick of it.
I've had enough of this.
It's a goddamn disease in this business.
All right?
And I don't know.
It started off great with those Judd Apatow movies.
I loved 40-year-old Virgin.
Those were all great.
And then Hollywood's just like,
oh, let's just do that and only that forever.
I'm sick of it.
Enough already.
I want a superhero who's the shit.
I want to see, like, you know, what happened to those guys?
They just, everybody's a fucking nerd now.
You know what?
I think this is the beginning of the end of the nerd.
I think the nerd has had its run on TV and on cinema.
I mean, they have so explored the nerd on that show, The Office, that half the
people on there, they're playing borderline retarded.
You know?
There's like two characters on The Office who sit around with their mouths
hanging open when they're not even talking.
And it's just, it's, I can't, I can't fucking watch it.
I'm sick of it.
You know?
There needs to be more.
They got to swing it back to fucking Animal House, Caddyshack.
You know?
How funny was Chevy Chase in Caddyshack?
Guy was the shit.
He had $100,000 checks laying around.
He's banging all these hot broads.
And he was still fucking funny.
I don't understand.
What do they think?
Like, I saw the trailer for, is it Green Hornet, Green Lantern?
I don't know what the, Green Lantern, that sounds really wrong to me now.
If you guys know anything about me, I can never get the fucking names right.
Green Hornet, is that what it is?
Okay, and I've gone on YouTube a long time ago just because I was interested in
the car.
I believe it's a Chrysler Imperial.
And he was the shit.
And Bruce Lee was his sidekick.
That's how much of the shit that guy was.
Bruce Lee was his Robin.
All right?
And you fast forward it 45 fucking years.
Now, the Asian dude is looking at Green Lantern.
And as far as I can tell, Seth Rogen is basically going to be like the white
cop on fucking Sanford and Son.
What's going off?
How does this gun work?
Wow, that was a big explosion.
You know, he's like the, uh, that, that mousy black girl in, uh, um, police
academy.
You know, is he going to have the don't move dirtbag move at the end of the
movie when he finally grows in to being a superhero?
And let me guess, he has to save the Asian.
So you have a little bit of fucking, uh, wax on, wax off there.
Is that what the fuck's going on?
You know what?
Fuck that movie.
Not fuck Seth Rogen.
I love Seth Rogen.
But fuck that movie.
I'm not going to go see it.
I don't want to see, you know.
Seth Rogen, he finally, he gets himself in shape.
People still call him a fat ass.
He isn't.
He got himself in shape.
He gets to play a superhero.
He earned it.
And he still has to play this wishy-washy, unsure of himself.
You know?
Ah, fuck that movie.