Name: Bill Burr - iPhone
Uploaded: 2011-11-21T18:35:46.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr - iPhone' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2011-11-21. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr - iPhone' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2011-11-21. Transcript available.

Now, you fucking douchebags, fucking douchebags, trying to get this goddamn
iPhone for what?
Everybody's going to have one in six weeks.
All right, they got like fucking, they got like 20 cargo ships right off the
coast, filled with them.
Just in a holding pattern, just trying to work up the fucking nerd frenzy.
What are you doing?
You're buying into it.
Go fuck yourself, ghost of Steve Jobs.
Okay, you want me to buy your phone?
Fucko, put it in the goddamn store.
Stock your fucking shelves.
All right, when you got plenty of them, then you fucking call me and I'll go
down and get your goddamn phone.
You motherfucker.
You recently dead son of a bitch.
You're going to fucking sit there?
Oh, you know, it's fucking ridiculous.
I have listened to fucking Bobby Kelly.
Dude, they got plenty of them, dude.
Go down to the store, dude.
And I fucking go down there and they don't have them.
And they go, you know, we release a couple.
If you go to our website, dude, if you go to our website, dude, fuck your
website.
Sir, don't use that language in this store.
This isn't a fucking store.
Store has stuff that I can buy.
I don't walk into a store and then you tell me to go to a computer back at my
house.
Right?
This is still a store, right?
Why don't you fucking call me when you got the shit that I want?
Sit here, play your fucking games.
You know?
I know that you didn't come up with it with your stupid genius t-shirt.
How much of a fucking discount did they give you on the fucking iPhone for you
to play ball?
Huh, Seth?
For you to sit here and lead people around like this and create this artificial
fucking frenzy for these goddamn phones.
Really?
You came out with a new phone and you only made 18 of them?
You fucking cunts.
I'm sticking with the droid.
Droid.
I'm sticking with this thing.
You know why I like the droid?
Because if you want one, you can just walk over and buy it.
And I don't want to hear from any of you cunts who listen to my podcast going,
Yeah, you just go out here and you just pre-order one.
I'm not fucking doing that.
All right?
I got too much shit to do during the course of the day to fucking sit here and
start filling out packing lists like I'm working in their warehouse.
I don't work for those assholes down at the iStore, whatever the fuck you call
it.
Fuck them.
Fuck their phone.
Okay?
I'm going to get one.
I'm going to get one after the first of the year.
With all you dumb fucks out there who spent way too much money on people you
don't really give a fuck about.