Name: Bill Burr - Advice: Fat Shaming Won't Work
Uploaded: 2014-07-01T12:01:55.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr - Advice: Fat Shaming Won't Work' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2014-07-01. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr - Advice: Fat Shaming Won't Work' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2014-07-01. Transcript available.

Your fat shaming won't work.
Hey, Billy Bench Press.
Here is my conundrum, and I need your help,
and maybe the help of the lovely Nia
on how to handle a situation with my wife.
My wife has been really down lately about her weight.
She's probably put on 20 pounds in the past two years
and is having trouble getting rid of it
before Nia jumps all over me.
Jeez, Nia has a rep now, huh, for jumping all over people.
Let me state that not once have I made this an issue,
and I tell her all the time she's beautiful, all right?
Her weight gain has not bothered me in the slightest
as I barely noticed it.
The problem is it has killed her attitude
and has been the subject-slash-starting point for many fights.
I get blamed for not helping her,
even though I cook all healthy meals each day,
and when I call her out for not going to the gym enough
or eating the wrong shit, she flips out.
I try to stay as positive as I can,
but I can only take the verbal beating for so much more
before I snap back and tell her to stop blaming me
for her issues.
Any idea how I can handle this situation?
Not sure who I should turn to,
but since she is a Gemini,
I thought you were the man for the job.
Thanks for everything and go fuck yourself.
All right, this is what I would do.
I would go out to your local CVS
or even that, maybe a card store
where you can write something original, all right?
And get something nice and loving on the cover
and then you write from your heart
how much you love her on the inside, all right?
Something really quick.
And then you have an attached note.
And in the note,
you basically, in a calm, positive way,
express the fact that you're worried about her
and you really want,
and it kills you that she's not happy
and you love her.
So when she's not happy,
you're not happy and you want to help
and you feel like basically where she's at,
what you told me,
where she's at right now mentally
is preventing you from helping her
and that you don't want to fight.
And this is the bottom line, dude.
It's only 20 pounds.
I mean, that's a fucking joke.
You know, she can get that off.
She just, you know,
and obviously she wants to.
She sounds like a really strong person
and most people who are strong,
you know, their Achilles heel
is the fact that they can't,
you know, if they've been strong their whole life,
when there's a sign of weakness is shown,
they get super insecure and super defensive.
And there's nothing out there
that is going to show you weakness
or a flaw quicker than putting on weight
because it's not like,
okay, this social issue
that only comes up in a certain thing.
It's what you look like when you walk around.
And I'm sure most of the world
is not even noticing or whatever,
but to her, she sees it constantly.
So it's beyond just a pound thing.
It's a mental fucking weight on her head.
So I would try to, in a positive way,
open the doors to some new line of communication
and you really have to extra be on your game
because she might lash out at you.
Even if she's receptive to this,
she might go back to the other thing
and it's going to be really hard.
But what you have to do,
considering she's losing her cool,
is you have to stay extra cool
to kind of balance it out
and just sit there
and let her yell at you
and say all that type of stuff.
And if you just sit there
and you say nothing,
okay, and you just let her go
and you're just sitting there
and you wait for her to finish
and you just,
rather than taking what she's saying personally,
you analyze it
and just be like,
okay, right,
you know, that's another example.
I'm not trying to nitpick.
That's another example right there
where I'm trying to help you
and I need you to stay calm,
blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
You're not feeding the fire
and it kind of hopefully
will just burn itself out.
And fortunately,
she's a woman.
So I think she's going to be
way more receptive
to this line of attack
because it's socially acceptable
for a woman to be weak
or admit to weaknesses
where a guy,
you know,
we're supposed to be fucking John Wayne,
you know,
eating steaks her whole life,
sitting there
with the fucking head wound going,
it doesn't hurt,
you know?
So that's what I would do.
I would really,
you know,
and then I'm not saying
that you just have to sit there
like a bitch either.
Like there will be times
where you just have to sit up
and just say,
listen,
you're saying a bunch
of mean things to me right now
which is going to possibly
cause me to say mean things
back to you
which I don't want to do.
So I'm going to go for a walk
and when you calm down,
you know,
I would love to sit down this
because I'm going to help you
through this.
All right?
And just,
you know,
walk out as she's screaming
and yelling at you
and just go for a walk.
You know?
Just go for a fucking walk.
Give her a good fucking
two hours to calm down
and then just come back
and sit down
and I wouldn't even bring it up
and I'd wait for her
to bring it up
and then just let her
say her shit
and I,
and I,
if you just keep doing that,
I think
hopefully that'll,
that'll get you
to where you want to be.
I don't fucking know.
Um,
but I definitely
wouldn't do the fat shaming
thing that I do
in this,
this case scenario.
Yeah.