Name: Bill Burr - Creeps At Disney
Uploaded: 2015-09-11T06:38:04.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr - Creeps At Disney' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2015-09-11. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr - Creeps At Disney' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2015-09-11. Transcript available.

rapaport he fucking told me about this thing that he did um i gotta find it man
uh did anybody
listen to michael rapaport when he was on the howard stern show when he played
fantasy football
against the fantasy football guy and he won he had his son pick out the fucking
teams and evidently
he was shit talking and this guy wasn't good at shit talking and he absolutely
buried him on the
fucking howard stern show i'm trying to find the clip if anybody has the clip
please send it to me
and then i will retweet it um i'll retweet it you know you know on the podcast
twitter account and by
saying i've been trying to do it my fucking laptop died i got a new hard drive
put into it and it shit
the bed so uh i just said fuck it and i went out and i bought like an 800 lap
laptop fuck it i'm done
buying expensive ones not like 800 bucks that's that's you know that's cheap
for a fucking laptop
so uh i'm not and this is the great thing about this one this laptop i'm not
putting any information
on it i'm not putting any of my fucking music on it i'm not putting anything on
it so when it inevitably
shits the bed you know did you save it to the iCloud fuck the iCloud fuck the iCloud
fuck the iCloud
and fuck Disneyland and fuck Disney World i read up on that shit dude that is
so goddamn creepy how
they're gonna gonna microchip you when you go in and out of that park the
entire fucking time
and the only way to fight it is to just not go because you can't have an
intelligent conversation
with most people because most people are morons most people be like dude why do
i give a fuck if
they know where i bought a fucking slurpee i don't give a shit as long as i'm
on space mountain
right they don't give a shit and it's so perfect because eventually when the
government microchips
everybody one of the arguments is going to be like well they microchip you when
you go to Disneyland
do you think that mickey mouse is evil dude i was reading this thing where they
literally you're going
to go in there and the people dressed up as the characters are just going to
come up to you and be like
hey bill how's it going i'm sorry hello bill that's you know i almost said it's
pluto that's when you
know you're doing a bad impression when you have to say who the fuck it is
hello this is arnold
Schwarzenegger um like those characters are going to come walking up and saying
hello to you
all right so if you're walking in there with that wristband that is tracking
you from a fucking
satellite in outer space and pluto comes up to you and knows your name before
you introduce yourself
and in the meantime in the background it's singing it's a small world after all
if the that trifecta
of shit doesn't creep you out then uh i think you're a robot either that or you
deserve whatever
happens to you when you're in there you know what i mean those fucking creeps
over at disney when are
they not going to be creeps arthur ash award to caitlin jenner so you get the
fucking exclusive
interview with diane sawyer ah shameless absolutely fucking shameless all
alleged but i feel after that
whole deflate gate thing it doesn't matter all you got to do is you just say
shit and then it becomes true