Name: Bill Burr - President Donald Trump | Celebrity Pundits | Crying Adults
Uploaded: 2016-11-11T13:36:36.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr - President Donald Trump | Celebrity Pundits | Crying Adults' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2016-11-11. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr - President Donald Trump | Celebrity Pundits | Crying Adults' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2016-11-11. Transcript available.

Bill Burr - President Donald Trump | Celebrity Pundits | Crying Adults

hey what's going on it's bill burr and it's time for the thursday afternoon
just before friday
monday morning podcast and i'm checking in on you i'm just checking in on you i
really need
to check in on you at least half of you a little less than half oh jesus make
sure you guys are
right there's a lot of crying going on out there jesus fucking christ i've
never seen so many
fucking adults crying in my life what is with all the fucking crying i get it
your person didn't win
but jesus christ you're making the left look horrible i'm going to canada i
love this shit
where people are like threatening like share share goes if trump wins i'm gonna
go to canada it's like
who gives a fuck you know i didn't even know you were still here
look i'm not saying i'm happy i wasn't happy with either one of these people
all right
um but the level of fucking arrogance of celebrities during all of this shit
was just at such a whole
other level do you realize how fucking arrogant you are that you're making this
you basically you're
threatening that if if your candidate doesn't get in you're gonna leave the
country and your ego is
so fucking big you think somebody's going like well i want to vote for trump
but if he gets elected
did we lose share i got you babe the out of here heard barbara streisand really
you're
gonna leave Malibu to go live in Manitoba really you go ahead and do it i'll
give you 40 bucks for
your house that ought to get you that 9 000 acres up there go ahead go go move
up to yellow knife
the dumbest shit but i i literally think like that's the level of ego that you
have to have
as like an actor a comedian or something like that literally to i mean i know i
guess i talk
about it but i'm you know i fuck around i trash people i never told you guys
who to vote for
or whatever i just trashed them both i tried to evenly but that fucking level
that people take
it to where they just start uh you know i kind of was on i was on conan last
night which was
it was a really difficult show uh to do last night because uh you know you know
people are like
fucking stunned out here they can't believe it um as they can't believe it in
san francisco berkeley
fucking new york city and all that type of shit um so it was kind of weird it
was like going on
like right after a funeral i felt so um but i really think this is just my own
opinion what do you guys
what do you guys think about celebrities endorsing a uh a candidate because i
think the candidates they
also kind of reach out to people a little bit like i like i i've never
understood that like why would i be
like you know who are some of the people you know some of the fucking people
that have done it like i
just don't understand it's oh oh you know i was gonna vote this way but the guy
from my three kings
told me to do oh the movie where he tries to get the sky miles the guy who did
the movie about this
guy getting the sky miles is telling me this should be the person to lead the
free world
you know i got a lot of feelings on uh gun control but let me check in with
sean penn first see what
he has to say the level of arrogance that you have to have i don't know it's a
fine line because
it's like all right well it's good that they're involved politically but like
you know there's a
lot that once you're famous then they're actually gonna put a camera on you
then you're gonna start
talking you know it's the same thing it's when you become a huge fan of your
team you know you're
a big fan of your team right and you know you're always sitting up in the nosebleeds
and then all
of a sudden you get a part on a sitcom and then they got you sitting down there
and then your team's
doing well and next thing you know they're sticking the microphone in the face
of an actor right to be
or not to be hey what do you think buffalo has to do here in the second half
well i'd like to see
you uh i'm checking down a little bit it's like i don't i don't understand i
mean you know what in
defense of celebrities regular people do the same thing on the news and they
get away with it because
you don't know what their names are you see it all the time on these uh you
know when you watch the
news if you ever watch the news they always go we went out on the street to ask
people what they
thought about this new target that's going up i think it's going to take away
jobs yeah you know i
just think the downtown area we don't need that there's always that person
right so maybe that's
what it is that's that person is no different than any of those other people it's
just i don't know i
think once you get to a certain level you kind of need to gracefully uh shut
the up
all right having said that can anybody explain to me why they're making such a
big deal about the
transition of power here as far as you know we hope that it's going to be graceful
we hope that it's
going to be the when obama came in george bush was very grace gracious he was
very blood they all they
all were my entire life i've never you know reagan didn't knock on the white
house door and jimmy
was just like hey get the out of here we don't want any there's literally
cameras on that's another thing
too there's cameras filming you as this transition happens everybody everybody's
always you know you're
going to be grace gracious they know well you look you know they don't like
each other
you know this one's going to be particularly weird you know considering the sizable
overtly racist
individuals that you know i don't know what the they were hearing but they gravitated
towards trump
so considering you know barack being the first black president to now let this
guy into
i don't know according to people i hear i don't i mean looked it up was
endorsed by the clan
this is just nuts well that's it that was the end it's the end and now it's
over and now everybody
can move on and um you know i got i did conor last night i think uh i think it
went as well as it
could have gone and then of course you know i got people giving me you know i
was trying to say look
whoever's president it's not really going to affect my day-to-day then of
course yeah it's
because you're a white guy it's like i get it i get it i get it but your day-to-day
your day-to-day
this is my and this is supposed to be uplifting by the way all right knowing
full well that the world
isn't fair okay and that some people start way closer to the finish line than
others that's just
how it is all right and there's advantages and disadvantages to that you know
if you got to run
further you always think that other guy oh yeah he's he's all he's got to do is
just go right
from there to there right and you see all these rich kids they got drug
problems because they
have no worries in life they're rudderless and all that type of everybody wants
to think
if you're filthy stinking rich that you just skip around your life is awesome
i've done enough corporate gigs to see that there's not a lot of happiness over
there
they're really rich people i gotta tell you out in malibu you know neil always
wants to go out to
malibu she loves the beach and we go out there and there's these seaside
restaurants and
you know which are cool it's great you watch people surfing it's awesome you go
out you have
a couple of crab lakes and then you get the out of there but there's a mall
over there
all right the malibu mall whatever the you go over there and i'm just telling
you the people over
there i cannot put my finger on it they are weird really rich people there's
there's some sort of
fucking disconnect i don't know what's going on with them they just that i i
said it to nia i go
what what is what the fuck is with these people there's no vibe there's no
laughing
what's going on here and she just she goes they're bored i think that's what it
is i don't
know i don't know i did gigs um um way back in the day i did some gigs out on
the hamptons
no another place with like super rich people and they're just
fucking weird they sit there and they all look at each other they're looking
you up and down like
i showed up and immediately they were just like all right this guy's in here
for the day
he's a day tripper look at his fucking sneakers
huh look at his fucking orange afro nobody's red hair makes it in this world
before they met donald trump how the did he go from a brunette to looking like
me in seventh grade i don't understand it um
anyways but yeah you make your own opportunity and i think uh
you know as depressing as that is it i always looked at that like uh
i don't know i always try to see like what the i can do
um i just can't believe all the names that i'm hearing now jesus christ newt
gingrich rudy
giuliani these guys are coming back jesus christ that's like that stallone
movie where he took all
the action heroes from back in the day sagal and they all got to have one last
thing
unless it's a hit then we'll make like three of them what was that called the
last gladiator action
hero to i don't know drink your juice in the hood what the with the expendables
yeah this is like he's bringing this is like the republican expendables
he's bringing all these guys back trying to think of another classic name he's
got to go for
from way back in the day somebody didn't die
i don't know whatever but you know something it's over get on with your lives
and uh you know
there's all these protested colleges i don't know what they're protesting i don't
quite get it it's
like there was an election it was legal and your person lost um i guess they're
just voicing their
displeasure with the fact that this guy's in there i dude i cannot believe that
the host
of the apprentice is now president of the united states and that people are
this excited and hopeful
half the country is excited and hopeful you know what i mean
you know the most amazing thing ever are broke ass people that are republicans
that's the most
amazing thing on the planet so you guys in guys he's gonna make it great again
for you
all right please keep checking in on me throughout the years i want to know how
your life
individually will become great again or this country will become great again
so then your life will be great again all those people who are galloping
sideways um
i love how he wants to he doesn't want to have health care but he wants to
build a wall
from california to mexico oh how much money is that gonna cost
what about the job that's gonna create get the out of here that's a that's a
government job
do you know bad all of these you know something that's one thing that they'll
never police but
that fucking bullshit where these contractors they get these government jobs to
build
shit and they charge 10 times the amount that they should and these politicians
just throw the
fucking money around and they don't give a fuck or they have to do it whatever
the deal is you know
like the math on this whole thing do you realize like seven billion dollars was
spent
to get somebody a job that pays 500 grand a year
you know why because i bet it was i bet it was a bunch of people that build
forms you know foundations
and that's what you know they were like oh man i gotta get that i gotta i gotta
build the wall man
you know some guy with the rusted out pickup truck dude if i get that job all
our problems are gonna be over
i'll be building that for the rest of my life um what a crazy goddamn time you
know
everybody wondering how the this happened i think you know what it is is people
are still digging out of
what happened in 2008 and it would have been nice if one of these fucking pussy
politicians would have
said something about the fucking bankers you know um i don't know we will see
what happens but uh
yeah boy oh i'll tell you you know what's great though was when i went to go to
the elect to vote
i fucking had i i looked through all the fucking uh propositions everything i
had all my filled it all
out like a old lady and i went in there and i was just like bing bang boom boom
boom i i blew through
the whole thing knew exactly what i w