Name: Bill Burr - Dropping The C-note On Your LAY-DEEE
Uploaded: 2017-01-09T22:40:56.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr - Dropping The C-note On Your LAY-DEEE' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2017-01-09. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr - Dropping The C-note On Your LAY-DEEE' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2017-01-09. Transcript available.

all right calling girlfriend a cunt hey bill hope fatherhood is treating you
well if it finally
happened has not happened yet recently my girlfriend was being very
unreasonable
and running her mouth about something and i said she was being a cunt didn't
call her a cunt rather
acting like one and you know what there is a loophole there
there is a loophole there but when you drop the c word it's it's very difficult
like i've never called my wife a bitch ever i've never done it the entire time
i've been i never
called her that once one time i did say that she was acting like one and uh she
brought that up for
like fucking three years because she knew how important it was to me to never
call her that
and she fucking we got into a fight and then she pushed my buttons trying to
get me fucking
more and more mad because that's what they do and they're not doing it
maliciously that's how
they fight most of them where guys go what the fuck you say and then you start
fucking fist fighting
women usually don't get to that level so they're fist fighting is they they
they've already broken
you down psychologically and they just try to make you as mad as they can and
um if you're with a cool
woman they'll they'll take responsibility for that and they'll eventually
forgive you um so anyways all
right so you said that she was acting like one okay since then she's had her
panties in a twist and
what's your thoughts are that if anyone male or female is acting like a cunt i
can call them a cunt
what's your thought thoughts on women calling women a cunt and have you gotten
into trouble for calling a
woman a cunt i've never done that uh to a woman that i've dated have i ever
called a woman a cunt
you know it's funny as much as i use that word i don't think i've ever done
that
um no i don't do the name calling thing
as angry as i am if i ever done that
i've definitely like yeah fuck you you fucking psycho i've done that but i i
don't i don't do the uh i
don't do the the the fucking the uh those classics i don't i don't i don't
break out the classics i don't
say bitch cunt i don't say any of that um yeah i don't i just don't i saw i saw
that early on in
my life that that doesn't work and i saw what it does to a relationship i just
saw it um you know
i i had a paper route when i was a kid so you know you get to step into a lot
of people's homes
and watch a little movie trailer and a lot of times you're walking up to the
house and you can hear the
the director's cut of what's going on before you went in there you know so i
saw a lot of that you
know being from massachusetts there was a lot of hotheads and uh i don't know
as much as a dick as i am um i've never done that and i can tell you that it
gets you nowhere
so um
and the thing the stubborn thing that you're doing right now that you're not
apologizing for it is
going to cause her to dig her heels in and what you're doing is you're creating
this toxic
fucking cesspool in your relationship okay you could have said a bunch of other
words and you
went to defcon 5 or whatever the is it one is one the worst or is five the
worst whatever the worst one
you went nuclear honor i i think you should apologize and just say for the
record i didn't
say you were a cunt i respect you enough to not call you a cunt i just said you
were acting like what
okay i won't do that in the future i was wrong and don't even don't even defend
you just say i apologize
for what i said i shouldn't have said it just just apologize all right and
there'll be some rigid
residual shit but i can tell you right this right now if you're gonna make a
real a relationship work
when you're in the wrong you have to apologize you have to do that because if
you don't apologize
if you always get your back up if you fight them every step of the way then you
stop being a person
to them you're just this thing you're just this loud annoying thing okay but if
you say you're sorry
if you ever if you say like you know what you're right and blah blah blah blah
the times when you
actually are defending your position you have clout because you've admitted
that you were wrong when you
were wrong so there you go now i'm not saying she wasn't being a cunt okay now
that's the type of
thing if you want to say that that's what you say when you got your one fucking
buddy who for the most
part can keep his fucking mouth shut but even then you can't depend on that
okay if you're ever going to
call your woman a cunt you fucking do it you go for a drive and you do it in
your car by yourself
and you yell everything that you want to yell because she's not listening to
you you make all
your fucking points you fucking crush it you give your closing argument to the
invisible jury inside
your car and then in the end you know and if you actually stop for a second and
listen to me you'd
understand that but you can't because you're such a fucking cunt right and then
you look over
you know at the other person sitting there at the red light with you and if it's
another guy if it's
me i'm gonna laugh you know not at you but i'm gonna laugh knowing what the you're
doing
and if it's a woman she's probably gonna laugh knowing what the you're doing or
if she's a cunt
she's gonna squint her eyes at her and be more of a cunt
there you go so um yeah i do not nor would i ever do that i would to the to the
to my wife
i would never fucking do that i wouldn't do that to any woman that i was in
business with i wouldn't
do that with any fucking i wouldn't do that in general um but uh generally
speaking when i talk
about people um i kind of just call men cunts
i think it's funny to call a man a cunt to call a woman a cunt is uh it's just
not funny
calling a guy a cunt is hilarious and i stand by that all right not saying that
this is not cunts god
knows that word exists for a fucking reason but uh it's just too mean and i'm
telling you you lose
you lose in the end because uh you know they could just make your life
miserable and every court of law
generally speaking out there is gonna side with them and next thing you know
you will never play drums
again because she's gonna take them from you all right not the baby okay that's
the podcast for this
week uh god bless you all right you're fucking cunts uh go yourselves and i
will check in on you on thursday