Name: Bill Burr & Nia - Cocaine Up The Ass
Uploaded: 2017-01-13T15:54:37.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr & Nia - Cocaine Up The Ass' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2017-01-13. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr & Nia - Cocaine Up The Ass' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2017-01-13. Transcript available.

Nia you sound like you drank some of that what's that what's that drank you
sound like you're lean is that what the kids are doing nowadays with their
fucking cough syrup and their Irish spring that they take a cheese grater
and they fucking Irish spring that's one of my favorite things dirty Sprite
that's what Future calls it I like when you got all these these fucking people
on the internet and they show you how to make it because I was sitting you know
as a comedian I gotta know what's going on oh did you look online to see how
it's made yeah it's literally Sprite and like codeine like prescription
no then they take like a car someone put a Jolly Rancher or some shit in there
but like if you just look at the ingredients on the back of the fucking
thing yeah yeah like uh I gotta hand it to this generation all these
generations
every time you think like you know wow like like I always say in my generation
there was crack babies and I'm just like okay that's it that's the end that's
as
fucked up as you as you're gonna see like human beings do things like like as a
parent I wouldn't be able to be shocked like you're doing what right then came
meth heads which literally look like walking dead people they're not zombies
but they're not real people anymore they have like fucking they like when I
would
do gigs out in the Midwest you know out Iowa and in further west into those
states
you know celebrities go to buy a log cabin and buy a fucking pretend they own a
grizzly bear outfit right you go out there and they had like this before and
after pictures of people on meth yeah yeah and I was just like holy shit that
made that blew my fucking mind and now looking at these guys I mean I guess
this
isn't as bad as meth but just watching beings will always find a way to get
high
though new creative ways to get high like that's just kind of how it goes don't
you
think but I'm gonna sound like an old man here what was wrong with what the
fuck we
did can't just drink a couple of beers I mean what that that fucking drink that
they're drinking
that's like shit homeless people do or like like full-on alcoholics and people
will not
fucking give you like money for booze anymore and you just don't have it that
that's what they used
to do they go when they start drinking NyQuil yeah because prescription and any
of that stuff is
really like I don't know I've never drank that kind of stuff before but it's
supposed to mimic the
feel of opioids I thought opioids opioids opiates you mean oh no opioids is the
correct right that's some
bump on your ass no that's a hemorrhoid I thought opiates so that's opiates opiates
but hemorrhoids is also a word it is I think is that when you take like the q-tip
lace with the shit and you put it in your ass I don't know why you are obsessed
with
the ass but no no there was a thing that these kids were doing they was soaking
something there was I swear to god I swear to god I went down a rabbit hole how
these
kids get high there was this fucking thing they were doing they were taking
something
like a q-tip or something and they were soaking it in this shit that got you
high
and then they'd stick it in their ass because there's a thin membrane there
I believe it yeah like how people blow coke up each other's ass and stuff no
yeah that's
a thing that is not a thing it is I now you know what I'll go with the fucking
q-tip up
the ass no it totally is a thing hang on a sec that is not a fucking thing it
is the old
coke in the ass just yeah just picture what that looks like what do you cup it
in
your hand and then you can go spread it wider wider and yeah no fucking way
probably use
like a straw to funnel it in the anus really and how well do you know this
person hey dude
we've been friends for a while right you know I've seen you drink drinks you
use a straw I
use a straw right that's not really crazy you know and we both have asses so I
got this bag
of coke hear me out just hear me out just sit out sit out just listen to me I'm
not taking
my pants off I was just adjusting my belt listen all right coke this is gonna
be on my fucking
search engine now next time I go to Apple store coke up yes up the bum up up
the anus up the
arse up the arse so it's even in England I got cocaine blown up my ass so you
don't have
to what oh that's a vice article of course it is okay wait anal use rectal
administration
this is drugsforum.com so don't put cocaine in your butt people that's at reddit
uh live leak.com man blows cocaine up a woman's ass yeah was he trying to numb
it before he stuck his
fatty in there thing yeah so okay wait a second well you don't have to encyclopedia
dramatica
investigate it more just know that it's a thing that exists
all right well then I gotta look mine up well I gotta read the article here all
right this is
what you need some sort of fucking uh kitchen knife don't wait wait wait let's
not tell people how to
do it I mean I guess okay this isn't real Neil when the internet was suddenly
abuzz with rumors that
getting a friend to blow coke up your ass with a straw was worth the trouble I
had to see if I'd been
doing it all wrong after all blow doesn't come with instructions oh Jesus
Christ get to the fucking
point all right there's not gonna be a video of this is it okay okay uh I know
it's funny I said
hoping the conversation would cover but I just wanted to understand the
possible health effects
on a more fundamental level okay so he called somebody position's viewpoint and
a very nice woman
named Kate spoke to me I asked her about it and she fell silent he said I know
it's funny I said I was
hoping she says it's more sad actually he said oh yeah that's the word I should
have used sad overall
Kate was extremely helpful and promised to contact all the gastro uh someone
are all just still the
internet had spoken I had to try it not that that this guy okay I'm going to go
with the pictures now
he's got the spoon he sticks it in a vial all right in the end my high was no
more significant than when
I opt for the more orthodox approach all right so people are doing it because
it was the other thing
the thing I was talking about rave let me look this up rave drugs ass search
somebody got their booty eaten at an all in an American festival strange happenings
regarding EDM
festivals raves and drugs strange happenings regarding EDM festival raves and
drugs them
dot dot dot them and going to eat their ass not really and not what people are
thinking how to smuggle
in gear to a concert Jesus Christ shaking her ass at a rave party wicked woman
I don't know why can we move off of this topic this is getting weird
maybe it's getting weird we're not doing it we're just researching it we're
like Pete Townsend