Name: Bill Burr - Airlines Pulling Passengers Off Planes | Bait Car
Uploaded: 2017-05-15T10:25:52.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr - Airlines Pulling Passengers Off Planes | Bait Car' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2017-05-15. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr - Airlines Pulling Passengers Off Planes | Bait Car' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2017-05-15. Transcript available.

All right, you want to listen to somebody just fucking tearing me a new one
here?
So I was talking about fucking United Airlines and Delta and them just yanking
people off of flights and like what happened to customer service
And all of this type of, you know, I felt guilty flying United
The way they just dragged that Chinese dude off the plane or the dude going to
China
Just assuming he was
Chinese, Asian
You can give me that, right?
Who knows? Who knows? They were hitting him so fucking hard. I don't know
You know fucking
Fucking anyways
Airline bumping he said
He says hey you uninformed cunt
And i'll tell you nothing makes the reader want to read more when you just
start off with the insults
He said congress and the passengers bill of rights have led to more passengers
getting bumped due to more cancellations
And do you think he gives any examples? No, he just moves on to his next point
Also, if people showed up for the flights they booked
The airlines wouldn't be overbooked
Many passengers book multiple flights
How about if you buy
So you're just assuming that the guys that they're yanking off the flights did
those people
I don't do that
I buy one fucking ticket and I show up. That's how I do it
So you're telling me that that chinese dude or that other fucking person
On delta you're telling me that that that those are those people so they said
hey you booked like 20 flights
You only showed up for one
Hey, get out of that fuck. I said get out of there. You're telling me that's
what happened
Or are you telling me that because other people do that?
Because the guilty people did it that united and delta is now just gonna grab
some random innocent person and throw them off the fucking flight
I heard the reason why they did it was because they had another plane that they
had to get a flight crew to
And they just fucking yanked the guy off that has nothing to do with that other
shit as far as I know
But I hate what am I i'm just an uninformed cunt
Evidently you who just like me just make statements with no fucking evidence
behind it
All right plowing ahead he goes. How about if I buy a ticket for a flight and
miss it for whatever reason?
You lose it question mark
Is that how you run your shows?
Was that a point?
How about if I buy a ticket for a flight and miss it for whatever reason?
Comma you lose it
Oh, how about if you yeah, I don't have a problem with that
I don't have a fucking problem with that at all. I'm on the same page
I hate when I show up on time for the security line and somebody else shows up
super late
And then they get rewarded and get breezed through the fucking line like they're
in that t like they're part of the tsa party
They're the pre-check people
Dude, you're bringing up all this other shit that has nothing to do with a
fucking just somebody who bought a ticket and sits on the plane
I drive a car other people steal cars
Should I be yanked out of my fucking car because other people are stealing cars?
This makes no sense
I might be an uninformed cunt, but you are a pompous
Arrogant uninformed cunt
I could say that because i'm in show business and you know, we're all down to
earth
All right, let me read some more of your air quote points
All right, is that how is that how you run your shows?
No, I don't run my shows like that. You know, this is my fun. This is how I run
my fucking show
I don't have anybody kicked out ever you can be the biggest cunt ever I I
kicked the first fucking person out in 10 years
Because he was so fucking drunk
I'm a hell of a guy. I don't give a fuck
I'm a great guy when it comes to that shit. How dare you lump me in with united
airlines and delta?
You you you you hateful so and so
All right, let me let me at least finish this point here
Is that how you run your shows or if someone buys a ticket to your show and
misses it due to traffic leaving the house late?
Etc. Do you honor their ticket to the next show?
I will tell you this i've had plenty of people fucking reach out to me and I
have hooked plenty of people up with tickets
Okay, how about that?
Has everyone reached out to me?
Has have I seen every fucking email? No, but I hooked people up i've run into
fucking people walking down the street driving by in a car going
Oh, fuck. I didn't know your dad
Hey, can I go to the show?
I'm like, it's all sewed out. Oh, fuck. I go fuck it. What's your name? I've
done that countless times
So there you go, sir. I don't know what you're talking about
So the equivalent to that is I fucking pull up
Stand outside the gates of the airport. Hey, you guys flying to minneapolis. Uh,
yes, sir. We are
Can I can I buy a ticket? Uh, sorry though. It's all sold out
Oh, bummer. I don't worry about it. Don't worry. We'll get you on the plane and
then they fucking yanked someone
They yanked somebody off
I don't know
Why'd they pick the asian guy, huh?
Why couldn't they pick some fucking white dude in a suit, you know why you know
why
All right, uh leaving the house late do they okay? Well
That is what the airlines do if you miss a flight they put you on another one
So fuck off you non-reading pigment impaired cunt. That's not what they do
That's what they do sometimes
Other times they yank you up the plane other times they tell you to go fuck
yourself
Other times they say hey, you have two hundred thousand miles
You can't use them when you want to use them and if you don't use them by next
wednesday, we're taking them all back
Other times they say hey, we're just charging extra because it's post 9 11. We
lost all this money
We're just charging for food, but eventually we'll fucking stop overcharge and
we'll stop charging for this shit
For all the money that we lost in 9 11, which you know, we're now gonna pass on
to our fucking customers. So they take the hit
When was fucking 9 11?
I know i'm an under uninformed cunt as far as my calculations were coming up on
the 16th anniversary this september
You're still paying for pringles, aren't you?
Sir i'm all for defending the fucking man when it's when it's for I mean, I don't
know what you you just fucking
You just brought up a bunch of
I guess behavior by uh frequent flyer people
So then evidently I I should get yanked off a plane at some point because other
people are overbooking shit
You know what you're you're the kind of person that probably likes that that uh
What they call it the trap ride or the trick car whatever that fucking show is
You probably like that show you probably think that that's a good fucking show,
right?
That show I can't even believe that fucking show is on television
For the it's on true tv
We should change their name to fucking horrific tv
They fucking they drive down to like the fucking projects
And they leave a car with the door open keys in it running and then they wait
for someone to fucking steal it
And then they act like they got a bad guy off the fucking street
And I was reading comments underneath the you know, I love that they're gonna
go out of their fucking way
To go down there and try to get someone to go to jail. Why don't you go down
there and try to help somebody out?
I saw one guy he actually stole the fucking car. He knew it was the trap car or
whatever
He's driving with the door open because he knows that they just lost they they
fucking hit the lock so you can't get out
And he's saying he knows it's a trap car. He's waving to the camera and all
that
They asked me if you knew it was a trap car. Why did you do it?
He said, I don't know
Maybe I just wanted to get on tv and then he laughed and everybody's like that
guy's crazy
I want to party with that guy that guy's a dope or anything
It was it was to me it was fucking depressing
Like that's the level of options this guy has in his fucking life that he would
do something like that
And somebody else brought up a great point
Okay, like why don't they take that car around the fucking suburbs?
To the whites cul-de-sacs. Why don't they do that?
And everybody's like, oh simple because white kids don't steal cars the fuck
they don't
They absolutely do and i'll tell you there's a point in my fucking life. I
would have done that
I absolutely would have done that just for the stupid fucking just to have the
story
So I could talk about it loudly around chicks that I liked because I didn't
know any other way to approach them
If they ever did that in a fucking suburb
And a bunch of white kids started going to jail over that shit that shit would
not there would be entrapment
It wouldn't be held up in court and the fucking show would be shut down all i'm
saying
Okay, you sir, you probably like that type of shit. You probably like that show
You think that's a good show and hey, let's let's uh, you know rather than
giving this guy an opportunity
You know, they could just as easily couldn't true tv have a fucking show where
they go down there and they try to give somebody a fucking job
You know
I don't know