Name: Bill Burr - Fountain Street Church Grand Rapids | Video Games | Going Mean
Uploaded: 2017-07-18T15:22:06.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr - Fountain Street Church Grand Rapids | Video Games | Going Mean' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2017-07-18. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr - Fountain Street Church Grand Rapids | Video Games | Going Mean' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2017-07-18. Transcript available.

so anyways i want to thank everybody that came out to the uh the shows at the
fountain street
church in grand rapids michigan um it is and it is continuing to be one of my
favorite gigs i've
ever done um i know i always say i'm going to put up pictures like i didn't put
up a picture of my
drum kit like i said i was going to and i'll tell you why because uh you know i
got these simple
stands and the ones that i want i just wanted the single bracket ones i don't
like those double
bracket like i'm going to go play in a hurricane they weigh 9 000 goddamn
pounds um i accidentally
ordered those instead of the ones i wanted so i had to return those and now
today i'm going to pick
up the right ones i just want to have it all set up when you see it i want you
to see it right i want
it to have the right look i'm not going to have it like you know here's the car
i bought and i don't
have this the the tires on it so um but speaking of drums um my booking agent
my reuben kincaid is uh
you know i was telling him how much fun i have when i go on the road if i find
a place where i can go
play drums he goes you know we could put it in your rider that you know anytime
you do a couple nights
at a theater they can set up a drum kit there i go get the out of here that
sounds like some diva
shit he goes and he goes dude they they have music acts there all the time it's
no big deal so i was
like all right so i show up at the fountain street church and uh they had a
fucking they had a they
had this yamaha kit with this fucking horrific white trash like leopard skin
wrap i don't even know what i
i don't even know what to call it it was like somewhere between the stray cats
way back in the
day and uh poison maybe you know it actually looked like the fucking stretchy
pants that the slutty girls
would wear at the heavy metal concerts it was the same kind of print and i'm
looking at those things
going like what the fuck are these and she goes don't worry everybody always
says that sit down and
play them and the kick sounded amazing and i was able to thanks to my drum
teacher you know i have a
game plan when i try to tune something up and i got the snare to sound great
and um i went in on this
fucking hilarious i go in there on saturday to play i'm like about an hour
before the doors open
so i went in there and i was fucking wailing on him and when i got off the kit
i you know i was
literally like in like the place where the priest dresses and shit you know
puts on all the fucking
flowing ponchos and shit and i walked out and there was no one in the church
and i walked in the
parking lot and it was like fucking six of the security guys just standing out
there i was like
sorry sorry it was still a lot would have been great if they actually had them
out on the stage
i would have left them there for the show wouldn't have bugged me but uh it
would have sounded
fucking unbelievable um this giant church and i didn't realize because you know
last time i played
there i only played one night it kind of came in town i did it i was like what
the hell was that
that was fucking incredible and then i left but um this time you know i was
there for like uh two days
three nights and i was able to read up on like the history of it listen to this
shit this is all the
people that perform there because there was no bigger venue that was the
biggest venue in the uh
i guess western michigan or whatever or at least in grand rapids so if anybody
big came there they
went there everyone winston churchill spoke there helen keller spoke there
blind and deaf learned how to
fucking read and write and speak somehow figure that one out um who else uh amelia
airheart malcolm x
did i say winston churchill duke ellington ella fitzgerald dave brubeck
led zeppelin pink floyd you too in like 1984 played there i think zeppelin and
pink floyd was
obviously on their first tours and uh that's just that's just what i can
remember trying to picture
when i was looking at the wall who else i saw there i mean it was fucking
incredible eleanor roosevelt
and they had like pictures of them and then like their little thank you notes
and shit
it was fucking ridiculous uh bb king and then make
i think i said that in the video that i took which i will actually post
and i promise you i'll give you a picture of my uh my drum kit uh this week
but anyways let's let me talk about uh what should i talk about here
how about this how about how great fucking grand rapids is and it's one of my
favorite cities
i was there with dean del rey and he was fucking murdering all week and he had
a bunch of fans
came out too people flying in to see him and then he went on to detroit to go
play some rock club like
after uh after our show saturday night but there was this place i of course i
of course forget the
fucking name of it um but they had all these old video games in there the fuck
was it called and why is
my stomach still growling i had a bowl of cereal trying to starve myself before
the fucking acting gig
um oh by the way thank you for all your guys suggestions sec slash criticism of
my my dieting
or whatever this guy goes dude you can't say you're crushing it you know you
crushed it
if at night you're still having a drink or two it's like if you fucking i think
i don't realize that
mom yes i realize that um but anyways uh what was it called stella's or some
shit i can't fucking
remember but uh we went down there and they evidently they had a great burger
which i didn't have
went to this healthy place and got this fucking wrap
right in a water water and then uh we went over there because they had all
these pinball machines
and shit me and dean are fucking old as shit and we walked in there they only
had one pinball machine
but they had all these great um old uh video games and we showed up right and
we sounded like two
fucking kids d just goes they got asteroids i think we blew 10 bucks playing
that um
i've never been one of those i've never been a video game guy just haven't been
because they're
so fucking awesome they were like addicting but that is something remember back
in the day when
you would watch mtv cribs and then like these fucking people would have these
video games
in their uh in their houses and uh i used to always think like i always feel
like you buy those
and then you never fucking use them like you use it for like the first day and
then it's just like
oh wait i gotta go to work you know i have to work so i can pay for this big
giant stupid machine
that i could have just pumped a couple of quarters into and let somebody else
own and deal with the
fucking maintenance however if i was ever gonna buy one it would be asteroids
and my number two is a
game that not a lot of people know about and um i think for the most part they've
all disappeared
uh it was a fucking great game at least i loved it it was called elevators and
it was basically
it i if i vaguely remember it it was like spy versus spy kind of thing you were
dressed in white
and all the bad guys were dressed in black almost kind of looking like dressed
like the spy versus
spy from mad magazine and you had to start you get in an elevator and on each
floor there were these bad
guys and as you pass the floor they'd be shooting at you from the right or from
the left and you had to get
all the way up to the top of the building and get something and then come back
down again and the
worst was when you were going back down again and you'd be shooting at the guy
and the guy would duck
and he'd lay down on the floor and as you went by when you couldn't raise your
gun up and it was just
just your head at floor level he'd blow your brains out um i used to play that
one i'd buy either one
of those i guess no i wouldn't i wouldn't it's a waste of money but whatever we
had a great time and
i got a killer picture of dean in his total rock star pose playing the game and
uh i think he already
tweeted it out so if you look at dean del rey's twitter thing you can find that
so we did
that and i want to thank people at dr grin's comedy club i went down there and
uh did a quick spot
you know went up did some jokes or whatever and it was funny when dean was up
there he
started trashing this woman who's sitting in the front row because she wouldn't
shut up
and i said to the other comics go there going i've like it was one of those
deals as a comedian you'll
be on stage and someone's talking and commenting on your jokes and then you don't
realize most of
the crowd can't hear it so you're kind of supposed to ignore it i guess even
though it's driving you
nuts so he just snaps and trashes her and i was sitting in the back of the club
i said to the other
comedians it's like you know what's funny we couldn't even hear what she said
um you probably
should have just kept going i go i've made that mistake 20 000 times then i
went up next
and i did the exact same thing exact same thing and i trashed her and then she
got mad
you know said she was offended by some joke i did about the troops or some like
that it's like no it
isn't no it isn't i know when you got offended you egomaniac when i looked at
it i said something to
the effect of why would you think that you have anything interesting to say was
one of those lines
which was just really you know now that i've said it out loud and i've kind of
gotten out of the
emotion it was uh it was really mean i went mean that's what i did i went
fucking mean