Name: Bill Burr - Girlfriend's Daughter Causing Us To Break Up
Uploaded: 2017-09-18T11:59:49.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr - Girlfriend's Daughter Causing Us To Break Up' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2017-09-18. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr - Girlfriend's Daughter Causing Us To Break Up' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2017-09-18. Transcript available.

All right, my girlfriend's daughter is causing us to break up.
Is that a bad thing?
Jesus Christ, I mean, you're already dating somebody that already has a kid,
so that's going to be already 100 times harder to make that fucking work,
and then the kid doesn't even like you.
So, I mean, maybe she's doing you a solid here.
Hey, Bill.
Okay, here we go.
So my girl and I of seven years both work for the same company,
and I was offered a better position in Florida.
And she was also offered a position as well.
Now, here's where the daughter comes in and fucks up the flow.
Yeah, because she fucking probably wants to stay at her school.
Her daughter's 14, is just starting high school, is refusing to move,
and her mother is going along with not forcing her to move
and is going to pass on her position.
We agreed I will not move down and get things in order until she...
Wait, we agreed I will move down and get things in order until she gets there
in four years.
Now, for the past few weeks, we've been getting into more fights,
and her reasoning for the fight is...
Sit down for this one, Bill.
She says it's easier for me to leave when she's mad.
She's fighting you because it's easier for you to leave when she's mad.
I think that's the dumbest fucking reason I've ever heard.
Also, she keeps saying I'm going to go down and find myself some black ass
and end up cheating on her while I'm there.
Would love to get your take on this situation and get your insight on what I
should do.
Thanks.
And pick up a fucking drink, you pussy fuck.
I would say...
I'd say there's a staggering lack of trust.
I think the key here is to not get into an argument with her,
is to just sit down and try and discuss it with her and just say,
listen, we agreed that this is what I was going to do,
and now what it is, is...
I think this is what happened.
What she did was she did what was best for her daughter,
and she put herself with you in second.
But she still sounds like cares about you,
and the fact that you're down there,
she's worried that you're going to leave, and she misses you.
I think that that's what's happening.
So I would just ask her,
is this some misdirected anger
where you're actually just saying that you miss me and you love me?
Is that what you're saying here?
We could work through this?
And then if you're really not going to fuck around on her,
and you're really going to see it through,
then you ought to be able to just say,
listen, I'll do whatever it takes.
I'm going to be there in four years.
If you're not lying,
I think you ought to be able to work your way through it.
And I think this has less to do with the daughter
than it has to do with the fact that she just misses you,
and she's afraid that you're going to find somebody else down there.
Evidently, wherever you moved,
where there's a bunch of black ass down there.
That's what I would guess.
So you guys need to get on the same page,
and you need to have an honest moment with yourself
before you fucking slowly tear the Band-Aid off.
Either get the fuck out of it or totally commit to her.
I mean, seven years at this point,
why aren't you dropping a fucking ring on her?
That ought to shut her up for a good couple of weekends.
It won't shut her up permanently.
I can tell you that right now.
Oh, I can tell you some stories.
Oh, can I tell you some?
Oh, sit right back and hear a tale,
a tale of a married guy
who jumps through all the fucking hoops
and still gets the evil eye.
All right.
My wife.