Name: Bill Burr: For MeTV | Going to the Gym
Uploaded: 2020-07-24T11:00:03.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr: For MeTV | Going to the Gym' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-07-24. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr: For MeTV | Going to the Gym' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-07-24. Transcript available.

so guess what i finally did you know i i had that fucking rotator cuff issue
with my right shoulder
and then i finally finally did the rehab right blah blah i got the whole
fucking thing going
everything was great and now my left shoulder's fucked up so this thing's been
fucked up for like
a year i'm finally i finally said fuck it i bit the bullet and i i'm back into
rehab rehabbing this
goddamn thing because uh i miss going to the gym i miss lifting weights and you
know i gotta be honest
with you i i really feel like the gym needs me you know i mean anybody can go
in there as a young
person all shredded and doing whatever the fuck you're doing taking pictures of
yourself selfies
as you're fucking squatting half the goddamn gym anybody can do that okay but
it when you see
a 51 year old bald red-headed male with a bad shoulder hobble into the gym
okay reach down to tie his sneaker and blow out a hammy
slowly drop to his knees grimacing in pain refusing help because he's from that
generation
under his own power getting back to his feet slowly shuffling back out of the
gym leaving his water
bottle behind i like to think that the younger people think you know if that
guy
could have brought his old ass to this gym to suffer that humiliation in front
of that entire row
of ellipticals
i can't get here six four four to six times a week you know i always felt that
i inspired people when i
went to the gym you know there's a certain you know there's a certain vibe that
i bring to the gym
that you just you just can't coach it you can't teach it it's what i do you
know most people have the
inner ear buds i don't i come walking in with the giant fucking bose noise
canceling you know like a
gold-toed fucking white dude in first class that's how i come in you know plain
t-shirt sweatpants
dressed like fucking malcolm young if he did aerobics right rest his soul that's
it and all these
fucking guys with their newfangled fucking exercises right i don't even do that
i'm i'm from the
generation that's right behind the generation that used to wear the fucking
hoodie and then they'd wrap
the towel around their neck and then tuck the towel into their fucking into
their sweatshirt oh this is
an oldie but a goodie i told this on the podcast a long time ago maybe fucking
10 years ago one time
i was at uh i was living on the upper east side i was living on the upper east
side of fucking new
york right and i was new york sports club was the gym i was a member of and
this fucking guy came in
all right that fucking generation he had the fucking sweatshirt on with the
towel around his neck tucked in
you know into his neck right then he had larry bird short shorts on this is
this is like
this is like mid-2000s where shit was still baggy and everything he had the
fucking larry bird short
shorts on he had his socks pulled up to his knees old school looking sneakers
like tom mccann or some
shit and he had a headband on with the fucking white dude afro looking like ken
patera and he comes in
and he was lifting weights and every set he'd bring he'd make this noise he'd
bring it bring it down and
then up and he'd go yeah yeah super loud the whole gym looking over but you
were scared of the guy because
he was like fuck i don't know what the this guy was just this guy would rip
your arm off like a gorilla
he was going yeah and then the best part was on the last one when he shouldn't
have done one more rep when
he was fortunate forcing the last rep through he'd go
so we're over at the fucking whatever the the barbell rack whatever you call it
dumbbell kettlebells
whatever they are now they were just fucking dumbbells back in the day and this
guy is on the
other side of the gym going yeah yeah and we're fucking crying laughing but
there's mirrors everywhere
so you got your head down because i don't want to fucking deal with this guy
this guy looks like
he's one of these guys did an eight ball every night in the 70s and somehow
lived to tell about it
i don't want to fuck with this guy
for a fucking hour
it was one of the worst workouts i ever got other than my abs from laughing
but it was one of the one of the probably the hardest i probably laughed that
year
and it was that thing where you're connecting with strangers just looking and
just fucking
closing your eyes tears coming out um and then of course dropping the weights
boom boom every fucking
set love the guy um but anyway i want to get back to the gym i want to be that
guy i want to be
a fucking spectacle you know i do hate the gym is those fucking douches who
spend a half hour
stretching you know it's like go go take a fucking yoga class let's go
you see all these people waiting to stretch
two places where you can never get a spot the place where you stretch and then
the bench
people everybody fucking benches you know you don't want to stand in line
go to the squat rack that right there that's like fucking global entry to the
gym go into the
leg room there's nobody in there
um
i think that's changing though because when i uh
i was lifting earlier this year before i re-fucked up my shoulder
um
there were there were a lot of people in there
actually
they never used to be and i was actually psyched because i ran out to somebody
that i know
he goes i saw you at the gym i saw you like three times i just you always seem
like you just fucking
got your beau's headset on you don't want to talk to anybody
he goes you do legs a lot and i was psyched because i never do i never did legs
i was fucking
the ass my shoulders are fucked up
i didn't do any back fucking work all you did was bench press curl you did
tries and then you did
whatever those fucking things on either side of your neck are your trapezi that's
all you do which i
guess goes down your back but you just worked if you just wanted to have no
neck that's what you
wanted you wanted a big chest fucking biceps big arms that's all you did and i
i never did my back
so everything got all fucking was all strong on the front and my back was just
like mush
so i don't know whatever the fuck that did now i got bad shoulders so there's
one for you everybody
make sure you do your squats make sure you do equal on both sides so you're not
imbalanced