Name: Bill Burr | Socialism v. Capitalism
Uploaded: 2021-05-19T20:30:02.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr | Socialism v. Capitalism' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-05-19. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr | Socialism v. Capitalism' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-05-19. Transcript available.

socialism first capitalism oh god damn i really opened a can of worms here
people i don't even
know i couldn't give you a definition of either one hey andrew can you please
get bill to read
this i've been writing to build for a couple of for a couple of times before it
would be so grateful
if you get this to him thank you very much all right dude i gotta already say
you are suspect
that you you're an adult and you wrote a sentence i've been writing to bill for
a couple of times
before all right hey billy hey bill pasty fuck dangle balls redheaded redhead cunt
burr i'm going
to keep this short because i know how hard it is to read out loud for you yeah
it's about as hard for
you to write a fucking sentence um i am a fellow liverpool fan from tunisia
living in the netherlands
ah fuck it's his second language my apologies you are smarter than me god damn
it i thought for once
i wasn't going to be the dummy anyway um i don't get why americans only believe
in extremes oh shut
the fuck up i don't know why you dumb cunts if you want to give us constructive
criticism why you would
open it with a statement like that you just put me on the defensive oh have you
figured it out
have you figured it all out in the netherlands i've been there with the illegal
drugs there and
fucking all of these guys with itching their fucking heroin scabs on their neck
trying to sell you a
stolen bicycle that's not an extreme do whatever the fuck you want here in holland
i guess it's just in amsterdam anyway either socialism or capitalism nothing
else the ideal in my in my
opinion the ideal in my opinion system is actually a mix between the two god
damn it this already
sounds interesting a country with capital with capitalist economy but also the
same time social
policies like nationwide health care and affordable universities
yeah that's a tough one that's like hey what if you just did heroin once a
month and you didn't
get addicted to it um anyway countries which are successful with this the netherlands
where i live
well you pat yourself on the back finland norway denmark all right i want
people who aren't white
from the netherlands finland norway and denmark to write in to me and i want to
know if this guy's
version because i'm assuming this person is a white dude and that that this is
in fact the equal
opportunity closest thing to perfect that it can be i will tell you this uh one
of the biggest cunts i
ever met was in denmark this taxi driver i forget what he said but he turned
around at the end of the
ride because you americans are so stupid huh and i oh my god i fucking i almost
punched that guy in the
fucking head
i was so fucking he was such a fucking bitch too one of those fucking you know
six foot four 130 pound fucking european guys
fold like a fucking lawn chair as they say on crime stories
i stayed in that cab my wife was trying to drag me out and i fucking just said
trash oh yeah you're so
smart you drive a fucking cab and he's like oh he's putting his fucking bitchy
hands up
who's kidding who i didn't almost punch him in the face i was just fucking mad
and i yelled at him
that was the real thing i wanted to punch him in the face all right but i was
afraid because i watched
fucking uh what is that guy we had the drugs type to take uh tape to the inside
of his leg and he
fucking goes to jail or the fuck is the name of that movie which i will never
watch again it was so
fucking terrifying uh yeah i wouldn't want to go to jail but he was a big
fucking he had a big mouth and he
was a big bitch um anyway yes it will lead to higher tax rate but also you see
where that tax goes and you
won't have to sell your house in order to pay for your hospital bill all right
so you're telling me
in your country that there's nobody abusing their position of power and uh you
know there's no filthy
stinking rich person there or are you saying there are some but not as many and
it's spread out better
i don't know i understand why this can't work in the u.s because like what dave
chappelle said on
rogan to rephrase higher tax rate works in countries where the people trust
their government
also u.s is controlled by corporations um i kind of believe that all of the
countries at this point
are controlled by corporations unless you have a dictator uh am i crazy
thinking that i do like how you guys
are rejecting our food all you had to do was look at us to know you didn't want
to put that shit in
your body um all right once again every other country seems to be better than
this one and they've
evidently solved all their problems anyways side question i'm a 20 i am 29
years old and i would like
to start playing drums is it too late for me no because you're probably still
in college because you
don't have to fucking pay for it like those fucking college student lifers i
met when i was in
finland um no it's never too late it's never too late it is so much fucking fun
it is so much fun um if
you live in a place where um noise is going to be an issue i recommend buying
the v drums the electronic
kit if you can afford that or a used kit if you can't um and i also recommend
um looking in in learning all
about hearing loss and and uh tinnitus or however the fuck you say that word
and get yourself those
vic first headphones and really really be careful with your ears all right also
he said you're doing
great learning french i speak french and you are doing great i'm currently
learning dutch and i know
how hard it is to learn a new language well i had to set that aside because i
have to like i only have
so much space in my brain where i'm going to pick it back up when i'm on the
other side of this fucking
instrument thing uh p.s thank you for the podcast it helped me through some
tough times and for being
open about the shit you are dealing with it helped me realize certain things
about myself look at me
i'm like a fucking bald freckled male oprah go fuck yourself you cunt all right
man well thank you
for the input and I'm happy your life is better. It's doing better.