Name: Bill Burr | Getting Yelled At For Wanting To Cut Out Sugar
Uploaded: 2021-10-21T11:00:26.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr | Getting Yelled At For Wanting To Cut Out Sugar' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-10-21. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr | Getting Yelled At For Wanting To Cut Out Sugar' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-10-21. Transcript available.

all right sugar in the house debate
hey hey there billy uh birthday cake tits i know i still got him i'm a huge fan
and just saw you at
one of your sold out shows at the fox theater in st louis you fucking nailed it
and it was a dream
come true now down to business nice thank you for coming out to the show you
know i did that movie
i stayed right across the street at that hotel uh recently i cut out all added
sugars i noticed i
had a serious addiction and decided i really needed a change i got a baby girl
uh the same age as your
son i want to make sure i'm around for her as much as possible yeah nothing
like kids to get you to
fucking straighten up to my problem in perspective i drank three tall cans of arizona
arnold palmer's
every day anytime my girlfriend had sweets in the house i always ate it all
sometimes even before
she got a chance to have some i had a hard time with self-control oh yeah dude
i've been there
i've been there i have a 600 pound person inside of me i just paid my wife
brought home these chocolate
fucking uh croissants and there was two of them sitting under the little cake
thing you know
those glass things stands you put a cake on and i saw them and not only did i
think of eating one
i thought of taking both of them and putting ice cream in the middle of it
making a fucking sandwich
i just don't do it anyway person goes on to say i made it a rule to keep out
all sugar from the house
as well so i wouldn't give in to any temptation within two months of simply
cutting sugar out of
my diet i dropped 20 pounds wow no exercise or anything i was really fucking
proud of myself
after a while a little while my lady
started bringing candies back into the house yeah you're a couple of junkies
somebody's gonna go score some heroin then you're gonna be back on the fucking
junk
i asked her several times not to or at least hide them in a spot where i'm
never in
at the uh never at in the house or where i can't get to them at all
she kind of bit my head off saying well you should have better self-control
oh there you go well that's nice um well that is true i think putting sugar
back in the house is
the equivalent of stocking up the fridge with a recovering alcoholic's favorite
beer
this is what you should have done when she said well you should have had better
self-control you
shouldn't have said anything back and you should just walked out of the room
i'm just going for a walk
and then come back and then just be chill and wait for her to bring it up again
and then just be like all right can we talk about this now like adults
all right like i want to be around for my daughter why are you getting mad
about that
you got to come from that place but if the discussion starts with
well you should have better self-control he wrote like five exclamation points
out of it
like it's not you're not going to work it out
i'm big on going for walks it's another way to drop weight
just go for a walk you just walk out of the room that's what i i try to do now
anyway the guy said i said that same thing to her several times but she gets
mad and makes a big deal
out of it going as far as saying fine i guess i just can't have anything i
enjoy in the house anymore
yeah she's fiending no matter how careful or nice i'll ask her
she'll always make it all about her i've told her a ton of times that she
should respect my addiction
but she always gets pissed off and turns it into a huge argument for some
reason
well probably because you dropped the weight and she doesn't have your willpower
yet
and uh you know sometimes you know when you're in a couple situation and they're
they're cool with the fucking dad bod or the the fucking you know little extra
pounds you have as a
woman they can get like insecure if you start losing weight and looking good
they they get you know
shit is changing it makes them feel like you're gonna get rid of them like all
kinds of shit happens
dude like dropping 20 pounds like fucks with the balance of your relationship
it's really weird
um anyways he says this shit really pisses me off and i can tell mentally i'm
starting to break
yeah because she's able to go off on you and you have to sit there and act like
you're trying to
figure out which wire to cut so the bomb doesn't go off um so you can you
settle the debate for us
should she respect that i have an addiction and keep the sugar hidden should
she respect that i have
an addiction to keep the sugar hidden or do i just need to suck it up and have
better self-control
uh p.s the east st louis woke bits were the funniest jokes i've heard in my
entire life much love to you
and your family um oh he was in st louis not atlanta okay um well let me ask
you this sir
if your wife had a sugar addiction and she told you not to put any sugar in the
house and then you
brought it in after a couple of months and then she said she was willing to let
you have it in there
if you hit it would you do that for her if the answer is yes then i don't think
what you're doing
is out of line um i also think you need to have better self-control also like i
have booze in the
house i don't drink anymore i gotta tell you after a while i don't even see it
anymore like my wife
told me i asked her where something was she goes it's underneath the bar and i
was and i was thinking
literally like a bar like a like a like a ballet bar or something what what bar
in the kitchen what
are you talking about she goes the bar i was like oh oh yeah oh yeah because i
go in there and to me
it's i don't even see the booze just underneath i know there's batteries right
i got kids and their
fucking toys need a bunch of batteries so that's where i'm at so um it's a
little bit of both but
you know i don't think it's fair that she's going off on you like that and you
have to sit there
you know especially when you're making a choice that's going to be better for
everybody that she
should be reacting like that i don't think that's a very mature thing for her
to do and uh yeah she needs
to be more mature about that and that's just something that you know i don't
know she'll either
accept that if she's an adult or she won't or maybe she will in a few weeks but
like that my big question
is if you're asking for something that you would willingly do without a fight
for the other person
and it's something you really need and it's going to not only make your life
better but everybody else's
i don't think that's too big of an ask uh but i considering she has such an
emotional response to it
i think i would ask her what what is going on because there's something else
going on beyond that
you know women are so funny how they always do it i guess i can't have anything
i like ever again
yes that's it christmas is cancelled