Name: Bill Burr - FMTV | Bill Goes Off: Privacy Breaches
Uploaded: 2021-12-17T12:00:07.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr - FMTV | Bill Goes Off: Privacy Breaches' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-12-17. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr - FMTV | Bill Goes Off: Privacy Breaches' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-12-17. Transcript available.

so i get up to do my podcast i get everything all set up i'm ready to go i go
to go to my
fucking gmail my fucking gmail and like every three months these fucking gmail
cunts
they they just try to get information out of you hey here's a way here's a way
to make your
personal account more secure give us more of your personal information it's
like why would i do that
you're obviously having security problems hey can we have your phone number no
gmail you can't have my
phone number how many fucking times do i have to say no no means no in this
post me too fucking world
that we're living in you would think that these these these these technological
cunts whatever the
fuck you call them we're just out there sharing all this fucking information i'm
telling you man all
these all of this fucking shit did you ever seen that thing there's a
commercial out right now
there's a goddamn doorbell right and these crooks are walking up to the thing
to break into the guy's
house and it's lit up and they're like oh wait you see that circle oh shit and
then they just show the
nerdiest guy ever he's like at the gym this total pussy guy so i guess he's at
the gym trying to put
on a little bit of beefcake there either to get some ladies or i don't know
what and he's going and he
starts talking to the speaker going saying a bunch of shit that he would never
say to their face
i mean if he was standing there'd be like hey what room do you want to start in
first
but now he's you know he's the big tough fucking millennial cunt he's at the
gym engaging his core
whatever the fuck it is you know they run down the street carrying tables what
do you call that
crossfit you know hey if you're in fucking medical school right now as a young
person
get into joint replacements that and tattoo removal you're gonna make a fortune
right around 35 to 50
um so he goes yeah if i was you i you know i'd turn around and run talking all
this shit like
he's fucking steve mcgarrett right and uh all of this shit this is what i don't
get about all of that
stuff is like you get these cameras set up we were selling that shit on the
podcast and i'd be reading
the fucking the copy going wait a minute so this will film the criminal in your
house so this has
the ability to film in your house what's to prevent will be nice about this
some rogue employee
from just turning that on
and then you got the flat screen tvs with the fucking camera
what's the what's the stop missing mrs zenith from turning that fucking thing
on and watching you
i don't know it becomes like a weird thing i feel like the house in the future
if you want to run for
president someday you have to have all you do all your fucking and all your
conversating and all your
fucking masturbating in the hallways you know i think you can get like a cheap
like video surveillance thing for in your house
and just say like yeah listen i don't uh you know all the valuables and all the
people are going
to be in rooms so you don't need to show the hallways you got to have a you got
to have like
basically what was the panic room you got to have your panic room
where you can actually you know in the future you can go you can be in your
house and say whatever
sexist whatever fucking crazy thing you want to say you can jerk off you can
fucking you know
talk about your mother-in-law your father-in-law your fucking cousin whatever
whatever family member
you want to fucking talk about you just have like this this you know this dark
spot where you're not
picked up and you know and i think it should be the laundry room and what you
do is in the future you
just turn on the washing machine and the dryer at the same time so there's a
lot of fucking background
noise you grab a pillow and then you yell all this shit that you want to do
right
and you put a pillow over somebody's face that you want to bang so their moans
don't you know make
all the companies curious that they're missing out on the good stuff that they
want to watch when
you're was this too paranoid i don't know it's funny because they used to
always say that like
uh big brother was always going to be watching you and it just turns out to be
a bunch of them
a bunch of fucking perverts
like what's this i don't know it just i don't know the whole thing freaks me
out so anyway so i
fucking go uh i go to get on uh gmail yeah they're asking me all of this shit
and there's no way i
can i can't find the microscopic little thing that says opt out i can't fucking
find it and then
i go to turn on my recorder and then the batteries were or whatever i need to
be charged or some
shit. So I, uh, that's why it's fucking late.