Name: FMTV | Bill Burr Visits A Pumpkin Patch
Uploaded: 2022-01-02T12:00:22.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'FMTV | Bill Burr Visits A Pumpkin Patch' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-01-02. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'FMTV | Bill Burr Visits A Pumpkin Patch' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-01-02. Transcript available.

this is all basically people don't think the way that i think therefore they're
morons that's what
the theme is going to be here because i'm air quote enlightened i i'm thinking
i'm beginning
to see uh the fallout of like close to 20 years not even 20 years say like
maybe i don't know
we'll say 12 years of social media the effect that it has had in reality
television that is had on the
average person walking down the fucking street like i i gotta tell you
something i went to a pumpkin patch
yesterday right one of the great fucking things that you can do with your kid
you go to a pumpkin
patch and then they have like a petting zoo you know you learn stuff from the
goats right you see
the young ones all happy you see the fucking older ones that are all jaded
saying it's all
bullshit we're never getting out of this pen you know but the young ones have
hope right you see a
lot of metaphors as you're watching it right or is it a simile i don't know so
i fucking walk into this
pumpkin patch okay this it's all about the kids right you go into a pumpkin
patch halloween you're
a parent it's all about the fucking kids i show up to this fucking thing by the
way it's a fucking
phenomenal punk this has nothing to do with the pumpkin patch it's about the
people there
i first thing i walk in the first thing i see
is mom booty cheeks hanging out of a pair of daisy dukes
it's like you're a mom where are the rest of your pants
i saw another woman she was walking around she had on a fucking leopard print
slip no bra just walk like
walking around like like they're trolling for dick and a fucking pumpkin patch
like what are you doing
and then the guys had like fucking like super expensive sunglasses and fucking
sneakers and shit
and it's all i it was like the whole fucking thing was did you remember back uh
mtv cribs
right and all of these these uh musicians you know half of whom it was like a
rented house and they
would have their whips and they'd have their giant fish tank and like their
entire fucking house looked
like perfect right down to the the selection of fruit and the way it was placed
into the thing
like everything was ready for a photographer which by the way i saw somebody
there who brought a
photographer to to take pictures of their family that had literally like a paparazzi
level lens
and then i'm seeing all these people clocking that being like oh we have to
fucking do that
um
yeah everybody was walking around looking like a foot not everybody but like
there was this
core group of people that were walking around that looked like a fucking
instagram video
a picture or whatever um
i just i don't know i don't even know what my fucking point is but like people
are are starting
to walk around and they look like they're photoshopped and they're not
i i just don't i don't understand i don't understand the hot mom
like walking around with your goods hanging out with your kids
this is what kills me that there was like a husband there there was a dad there
like when do you let that go it's like it's over okay you're fucking you got a
guy
what are you still campaigning for and i don't want to hear this horse she has
the right to dress
of course she does i'm just i'm just saying
i i don't i don't uh
i don't i don't understand it
that was fucking it was weird felt like i'm at a pumpkin patch and i and i had
this weird divorcey vibe
like swinger vibe to it you know i don't know