Name: Psychiatrist Emails Bill Burr to Call Him Out
Uploaded: 2024-03-20T22:45:01.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Psychiatrist Emails Bill Burr to Call Him Out' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-03-20. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Psychiatrist Emails Bill Burr to Call Him Out' from Bill Burr Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-03-20. Transcript available.

All right. Psychiatrist's opinion for why you suck at reading out loud.
Are you fucking kidding me?
Jesus Christ. It's that bad that we had to bring a professional on here?
Hey, Billy Boy Freud. You get it? Sigmund Freud.
I am a child and adolescent psychiatrist. For some reason, C-H-I-A, he had
capitalized.
Working in a major city. So, you know, I'm not a mouth-breathing moron, at
least on this topic.
Here is the link to my credentials. I'm not clicking on that fucking thing, you
self-involved jackass.
To add to my professional experience, I mean, how do I know this is you?
You can just fucking send a link to anything.
I broke the deadlift fucking clean jerk fucking thing, whatever the hell you
call it.
Here's a link to me doing it. How do I know it's you?
All right. To add to my professional experience, I also personally have a mild
form of ADHD
that was never formally treated until later in life,
but definitely has led to issues with forgetfulness and organization throughout
my life.
All right. First of all, I just want to let you know that I'm offended that you
feel,
because you work with children and adolescents, that I'm not even adult enough.
That's actually pretty fucking accurate. All right. I get it.
You act like a child. You end up getting a child psychologist to fucking figure
out what your problem is.
Okay. Fair enough.
A common misconception about ADHD is that it means you can't focus on things.
That's not true. As you yourself may have experienced, people with ADHD
struggle to focus on certain things,
but hyper-focus on other things that are complex and sustain their interest.
Yes. I believe I've talked about this, and I think that you're plagiarizing me
from what you listen to on the podcast,
you know, so you can fucking continue to add, like, legitimacy to your claims
that you're a child and adolescent psychologist.
Okay. I would have believed that you were.
The fact that you had to fucking give me a link, you know, let's, let's, why
don't we analyze you?
What's going on with you that you felt the need that you had to send your
resume to me?
You know, what, what, what, what's, let's talk about that.
What's, what's going on with that? Like, where's that coming from?
I mean, you know, talk about your childhood.
Did you feel that your parents built you up?
Do you feel that they believed in you and thought that you could achieve things?
Did they not?
Is that why you sent me, a complete stranger, your resume?
Because in a way, I was, you know, because this is my podcast,
I represented an authority figure and a, dare I say, a parental
sort of figure that, that you went back to being six years old again
and had to send me your fucking trumped up resume.
Um, a common misconception about ADHD is that it means you can't focus.
Okay, I read all that shit. That's fucking funny.
I can't focus on things.
I just fucking literally took a left turn and then came back and started rereading
what I already read.
This hyperfocus often leads them to forget or ignore other things they can't do.
Forget or ignore other things that they can't do.
Okay, so the issue with ADHD isn't the inability to focus,
but the inability to appropriate, allocate that focus.
I think you meant appropriately allocate that focus.
Yes, I understand all of this.
I am hyper-focused when I fly a helicopter.
Uh, when my wife is talking to me about what our day is,
I'm looking at my phone and also thinking about something.
I'm not focusing on anything.
Um, yeah, I, I understand this stuff.
This is like, like, don't ever let the report,
your, your high school transcript,
like, that isn't, that isn't a reflection of who you are.
It's a reflection of how you felt about school.
Finally figured that out.
Because if you just take it at face value,
you're like, I'm dumb.
I'm not smart.
It's like, no, I, I wasn't into this shit.
I don't like school.
It's way different than being stupid.
Um, does that make sense?
Um, another common issue is that people with ADHD
have trouble keeping up with how fast their thoughts are going
and it tends to present itself when reading.
Yeah, I found if I actually slow down,
I read much better.
I also fucking, if I get in my head
and then I try to go even faster,
it all goes off the rails.
And I also think that when I'm reading slowly,
it sounds way slower to the listener.
Let's try reading the rest of this really slowly.
While reading the first and second word,
your mind is already on to the third and fourth word.
I've already fucked it up.
Is already on to the third and fourth.
I'm still stupid.
Uh, you can read entire sentences and paragraphs
and by the end of it,
think, what the fuck did I just read?
Yes.
Or when reading out loud,
you stumble over your words.
Yes.
Because your mouth can't keep up with your fast,
with how, with your fast,
your thoughts are going.
You don't have,
you're not a fucking psychologist.
You can't even write a goddamn email.
Or do you have HD, ADHD too?
Is that your fucking excuse?
This is an enigma.
I don't know what this fucking guy is.
This sometimes get confused with dyslexia,
although ADHD and dyslexia do occur together sometimes.
You're basically describing me.
I have a little bit of that.
Like when I look at billboards,
I think they say something other than what they say.
The words don't get jumbled up,
but they,
I just look at the words
and I think they say something else.
Uh, meds and therapy can
definitely help severe forms.
Why do you need to help it?
Just,
you're fucking really smart.
Your brain's going too fast
for this bullshit
that you don't want to fucking read.
Why would you drug that out of you?
Go find something
that holds your interest.
You know?
Like aviation
or a pair of fucking tits.
Uh,
but there are plenty of people
with more manageable forms
who adapt and learn shortcuts
and live full lives
without treatment.
I did that until I was about 30.
Hope this wasn't too hard
for you to read.
Well,
maybe you shouldn't have
so many fucking spelling errors
next time,
Mr. Fucking Resume.
Billy Bird Brain.
All the best to you
and the kiddos and Nia.
Thank you, sir.
Or ma'am.
Um,
yeah,
I,
I,
you know,
I,
that all of that makes sense to me
other than putting people on meds.
Uh,
I don't understand
why you have to go on meds
because your brain
is working too fast.
Uh,
I think that you should
seek out something
that makes you interested,
that holds your interest
and focus on that
and do that for a living.
And,
uh,
that's it.