Name: We Might Be Drunk Ep 36: The Last Word
Uploaded: 2021-08-16T01:00:10.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'We Might Be Drunk Ep 36: The Last Word' from We Might Be Drunk Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-08-16. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'We Might Be Drunk Ep 36: The Last Word' from We Might Be Drunk Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-08-16. Transcript available.

We Might Be Drunk Ep 36: The Last Word

we might be drunk we might be drunk as long as we are hanging out you know we
might be drunk
raise a glass let's talk shit head peeps rex and a bit maybe drunk we might be
drunk yeah
yo hey here we are we're starting it up we might be drunk good to be back i
haven't seen you all
week it's been a week yeah yeah we both went to our respected gigs and then
come back and you did
and you did it you taped the special oh yeah i forgot all about it tell me
about it it was great
covert guidelines you take the special corporate guidelines are tough for that
you know sam black
the audience legendary audience warm-up or what do you go cedar she's an
audience coordinator she's a
legend because one time she's so intimidating she's our best friend is comics
because she makes sure
the house is packed yep she makes sure people know how to behave in the show
yeah but one time
apparently i think it was during an anthony jeselnik tape and it was someone
might have been jeselnik
they were so scared of her that they peed their pants someone shut up yeah they
were like i don't
want to mess up the taping and she gets people so in line wow that someone
pissed themselves oh my god
so she's my gal she's on our side geez louise that's that's wild yeah yeah she
is brassy she
is a brassy she's a real new yorker is she yeah i brought it up she's from like
the cayman islands
and the caspian sea she's been here forever she's been here forever yeah she
banged uh what's his face
what are you talking about you can't be saying this no it's it's a joke what's
that guy's name
walk on the wild side lou reed lou reed who's more of a new yorker than lou reed
i thought you were
giving real gossip no no no no i'm just saying she seems like somebody who's
like i was hanging out
with warhol and all them you know in the factory yes but uh either way i got to
i love her she's so
cool she's got so many stories and we got to chatting and uh she said this
might be the last because
delta was kicking up so it might be the last unmasked performance wow in a
while and i was
like jesus she's like we just slid right in we're lucky to be here i was like
oh man totally read said
to her there we go there was one lady's whole job was to go to tell you to pick
up the mask
that was her whole job so what do you mean they'd pick up the mask for like if
you're backstage and
the mask is down here she'd go beep beep beep and you had to go oh to you or to
everybody everybody
everybody staff crew talent you're sucks i know i hate it i thought we were
coming out of it but
everything else aside from code was gangbusters uh without a hitch i saw taylor
we hung out brian
simpson and i are our fast friends we made love he's great i never well anally
i don't know if that
counts but he's a great guy and a great comic yeah i i've seen the clips he did
a clip on uh
on david spade show back in the day i think i sent it to you yeah you did yeah
it was killer killer
about how racism is like pennies that's there but no one no one talks about it
or something i can't i'm
butchering it but smart smart stuff uh but yeah great we got i think we got it
in the can on the
first one and then the second one i got loosey-goosey yeah to the point where
my reps were
like easy out there what do you mean well i had a thing in my throat and i did
a whole like oh i did
the semen you know i swallowed a load it was a huge load he was samoa and i
went off on like a tangent
about the jizz and it was killing so they were the crew was like well you got
to keep that in i'm
like i don't know it's filthy they're like keep that we were dying so that's
always nice but it's
fun i know it is crazy that you used to be so nervous yeah these things and
they're just like
i got jizz in my throat and people like jesus i know i know yeah but it's cool
see like we got
you know podcast fans in the front row people are going nuts you had your
people there oh yeah the
drunks were there the gays were there it was uh it was a hot night and there
was a couple people who
never heard me obviously and they were like yeah i went dark i went all in i
heard you went dark so
yeah give me an example you know like i just hit all the hot button anals and
the trans the blm the
everything you know i went all in men women gay black white did you get pushback
no not really i
couldn't say retard that was the big push but then brian simpson said it but he
threw it in with the n
word so it's kind of in the mix so you couldn't really yeah it's like putting
pill on food right
there yes yeah exactly and when i said the n-word uh it was tough to swallow as
well but what are we
drinking uh today we're drinking the today we're drinking the last word which
is uh classic i think it was
the n-word it's a classic cocktail from uh detroit from the 20s oh wow uh it's
nice and it's um it's
from detroit in the 20s yeah okay uh yeah what's the history so the history is
that it was at the
detroit athletic club that someone made it up and it was made from their um own
like bathtub gin
oh it was like you know the gin was really rough so they have to dress it up
with a lot of things
wow so this is uh once again like the paper plane uh like all equal parts uh
but it's three quarter
ounces ounces i know i neglected to mention that last time but it's three
quarter ounces uh
so you can take it on a plane sorry you can take it on a plane exactly uh it's
three quarter ounces gin
three quarter ounces green chartreuse and uh three quarter ounce lime and luxardo
maraschino damn
i see you got your math checked out by the way the other comments kicked you
right in the fanny on the
algebra there on the fractions they really gave them the business yeah they're
like three fourth three
four three four this guy knows that uh huh well it just sounds that's it they're
they're cruel out there
but you know you know who loves bathtub gin whitney houston all right i was i
was on the road the
night she died i remember the night she died i was in knoxville uh tennessee
opening for a comedian
who passed away recently spanky brown what do you know spanky brown no that
sounds made up no
well it's he was so i remember that night because it was the night jeremy lynn
dropped 38 on the lakers
lynn sanity so i remember i this is the tweet i remember from that and i forgot
who said it but
someone tweets holy shit whitney houston died that's lynn sane
it's like jesus christ twitter man man did he have a run the city was abuzz
with linsanity
speaking of buzz cheers cheers thank you beer jew my doctor he told me to watch
my drinking
now i drink in front of a mirror all right he ran my blood he opened up a tab i'll
tell you
now gin might be the least desirable alcohol you think so i think so it depends
i i know people
who drink gin and soda drink gin straight i think ricky velez drinks gin gin
tonic damn that is amazing
that's a good drink oh that's a summertime drink right there yeah dude oh boy
oh boy that is delightful
this is good man danny boy it's called what is it called it's called the last
word the last word
i like it yeah that's good stuff yeah i was in kentucky all weekend uh this
feels like a kentucky
on your front porch yes i'll tell you man that city i'd run on hirshberg
opening for me if you don't
know his comedy check him out r-a-a-n-a-n hirshberg dude killer dude is he's
got high energy and great
jokes he's a hard follow he's he's loud he's brash he's funny he's smart and he's
high energy like he's
sweating up there oh he got off one time one night and he was sweaty and i was
like oh you work way
harder than i do up here i'm literally leaning against the stool i respect that
i mean for sure it's
it's another testament this is horrible timing but uh i met him when he was boozing
like 20 years ago
and uh he was uh he was a son of an onion like he was an old drunken sailor
like he was
can't cantankerous yeah couldn't get that out he was yeah and he i remember
that's where i met him in
cincinnati go bananas uh and he had an edge he did definitely an edge he was
smoking cigarettes he
was boozing he was like a angry little poet yeah he was he was he was like a
little
tiny jewish hemingway and uh but it's still funny back then then he cut off the
sauce and
now he's just a just a happier dude happier dude funny as hell killing i feel
he's got some credits
and uh he's at the cellar he's he's gonna be big i think he opens for whitney
every now and then yeah
you whitney the other guy not bad this is unreal dan's good killer you're a
really cockologist top
notch this is delightful i'll tell you it's like one of those kills he would
kill so hard in front
of me i would have to open with local stuff yeah just to get them that's the
move because i don't
have that energy i just i'm not gonna yell i'm not gonna so i had to i i had
some kentucky bits from
the last time i was there my opener was uh because i went to the racetrack you
know yeah that was the
worst dressed person that was the only one who didn't look like a villain in jango
and chain
so i opened with that that saved me a little just some horse racing jokes yep
got them but damn i i
was sweating for the first couple minutes for sure yeah i wasn't moving i was
sweating because i was
like shit he's he killed he kills but it's a testament to the to the writing
because you have to come up
there and you're not going to tap dance it's just going to be on the basis of
the jokes well he's got
the jokes and the energy that's true that's true he's going to pass all of us
let's be honest
and he's not drinking uh we're ruined yeah this is the problem with this dad is
it's too good you
gotta suck them down like lemonade it's really good only three quarter ounce
gin so you'll be all right
if only whitney was in a tub that late i'll tell you
i'll tell you good teacher really seems to get
i can't so that's my new drinking i have like a i have like Tourette's right
Roddy Rett's can you uh
what do you think about the guys who wake up in the the bathtub with the ice
you know they're like
shit my uh spleen is gone you ever hear about that is that a myth no i think
that i think it's their
kidney not their spleen oh the kidney that's right well they uh i mean it's
funny the ice bath it's
either that or uh you had a great workout yeah you're like an athlete yeah yeah
you're either joe rogan
or you just got left in a motel six right you got shanghaied or whatever i did
a gig in portland
once and i took the shanghai tour you know what that is where shanghai is where
you're at a bar
somebody knocks you out with a blunt object and you wake up on a fishing boat
in the middle of tahiti
or whatever and they go yeah get to work shanghaied you got shanghaied i'm just
saying i did the
shanghai tour where they they tell you what happened damn that was a big
because portland's a big port
town obviously and uh they they throw you on a fishing boat with a bunch of
like mongolians
and you're that's it i'm gonna be there soon oh well keep a head on a swivel
you've been knocked out
of the bar before i have i wasn't knocked out i was just hit twice so i've been
hitting the face in a
bar damn yeah thank god with a jew helmet fro the jew fro saved me yeah it's
padding it's crazy it is
padding i had longer hair it was one of the things where i needed a haircut and
i just didn't get a haircut
and i had that my mom was so mad at me because she followed me on instagram and
i was posting like
insta stories with the cops making jokes about it i had still shards of glass
in my hair but i was like
what am i gonna do i'm like i need i can plug these gigs i'll do so i was doing
and the cops are rolling
their eyes but i'm like hey you better get this guy officer and they're just
like all right and my
mom's like what she called me what the happened i'm like i'm sorry damn well i
know about that that was
vermont yeah what was the other one the other one i was uh i do it it's part of
this white night story
when i do that but it's just i gloss over it quickly but