Name: Ep 76: Joe List w/ Emperor's Clouds & Mist
Uploaded: 2022-05-23T01:00:04.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Ep 76: Joe List w/ Emperor's Clouds & Mist' from We Might Be Drunk Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-05-23. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Ep 76: Joe List w/ Emperor's Clouds & Mist' from We Might Be Drunk Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-05-23. Transcript available.

Ep 76: Joe List w/ Emperor's Clouds & Mist

Hey folks here we are we might be drunk we're doing it we're back worlds are
colliding we got a big guest and old pal. We might be Tuesdays. Oh we might be
gay we might be a lot of things how are you Jojo? Genuine question where are
the
cameras? Am I on? One here, one here, one here. I noticed none of them are
pointing at me oh this
guy. Is that you? That's your camera? That's your A. I'm looking at you assholes
and I don't see
nothing. Oh yeah. All right so do I talk to you do I talk to the people at home.
Hey folks we're the
hosts. Yeah we're going sober today you got it with a green tea I assume. I got
an
Emperor's Clouds Mist Grande just had my chocolate chip cookie in the lobby.
What
is an Emperor's Mist? Don't worry about it. No it's a green tea it's a it's
like a
standard green. You want to sniff? Yeah. You might get a little bit of my
breath on the
lip there. Sounds like a good queef. It's an Emperor's Mist. Not bad right?
Just a
typical green. There's also the Jade Citrus Mint. That's a mint green tea and I
don't care for the mint. Nah I don't like the mint either. Yeah. Tea I
associate with
being sick. I can't do tea often. Oh interesting. Don't tell the British. Well
it's like
chicken noodle to me. I can't it's like I can't get amped up for it because I'm
like
I just I'm like yeah I'm sick. I love chicken noodle. I like it too but I get
it when I'm sick.
I see you associate. I always think this though it doesn't people are always
like if
you're sick have a little green tea but I'm like I drank three cream teas a day
every day
and I got sick. Yeah. So it must be how rappers feel with Sizzurp. They're like
you need some
cough medicine. He's like that's all I drink. I mean I mix it with uh hooch.
What's Sizzurp?
That's they drink cough syrup to get fucked up. I had NyQuil for the first time
during COVID.
I'd never had it. It's incredible. It works. It's great. Fantastic. We call
that a free lapse in the
sobriety business. Is that right? Yeah you take a nice NyQuil. Whoa. Yeah it's
pretty good.
Silent free lapse. So is it allowed? Well I take the pill form. I wouldn't take
the liquid because
I'll let you know the next thing you know I'll be raping your father on
Christmas Eve. Because it does
come in a glass of shot glass. Exactly. Yeah. No totally. You gotta do pill.
Damn. Oh yeah I never
thought about that. Starts with mucinex PM it ends in a fucking glory hole.
Yeah no there's people
that do that. People like alcoholic they drink hand sanitizer or uh NyQuil.
Damn. Yeah. I've
crushed up a Tylenol PM and shoved it up my ass. Sure. Snort that shit. Do a
line. Yeah.
Tylenol PM works too. That'll knock you right out. It will. Benadryl? Eh. I've
kicked that because
it I'm immune. Well you wake up. It's not quality sleep. Well Tylenol PM and
Benadryl is the same
drug. Ah shit. Same sleep drug. It's all mental. What do you do? Do you take a
drug to sleep?
Anything? People are starting to hate that watch by the way. Really? It's a
problem. Yeah. Oh damn. It buzzes
every hour. It said uh someone wrote Mark Norman's watch. The guy did like
three takes
of it. It was one of those tweets where he deletes it and rewrites it and then
writes
it again. Ah. But he was like Mark Norman's watch has interrupted more podcasts
than Will
Smith or said it didn't make sense but it kind of made sense. Doesn't make
sense but you
can see that they don't like it. Yeah. All right. Right between the lines.
Interrupted
more podcast more comics than Kanye. Eh. Eh. I'm trying to punch it up. Did he
interrupt?
Well I guess interrupt is the wrong word. He fought with D.L. Hughley, Pete
Davidson
and Trevor Noah. And Mike Myers. Right? Is that right? Oh Mike Myers. He just
made it weird right?
He just made it weird on SNL. Yeah. That's a different podcast. Pete Holmes
podcast.
Well D.L. Hughley, I didn't know he had beef with it. D.L. was like a former crip
I think.
Is that right? I wouldn't fuck with D.L. Interesting. Yikes. It's on the D.L.
Yeah. I had no idea
he was a crip. Not anymore it's not. Yeah. No that's uh no he's like a he came
from the
gangs I think. I mean Matt maybe fact check that. Really? D.L. Hughley seems
like such a I guess
he does have a neck tattoo. Hmm. So maybe you got something here. Yeah. Was he
a crip?
The blood so. Oh eehoh. That's a big fuck up right there. That's like the n-word
for that.
Yikes. I don't think we're supposed to be talking about this. I think we should
move on. It's on Google.
Yeah well Google's not a person with a podcast. Yeah. I'm not gonna stab Google.
Who's Google? Which one was that? Was that Bezos?
Google? Yeah. No. Bezos is Amazon.
Who did Google? Yeah who did Google? Who started Google? Well there's Zuckerberg
with Facebook.
Yeah. And then there's uh the other guy.
Larry Page. Trump was the president. Who's the CEO now?
It's not them now is it? What's his name? Uh Apple. Uh Jobs.
Wasn't it? Who was the guy that Nate went on his boat and he owned the Blazers?
Sundar. Sundar Pichai.
No it's not Sundar. It's my favorite green tea.
I think I hiked Sundar Puchy in Peru.
Oh yeah.
October 2015. I don't think he invented it. We would have heard that name. I've
never heard of Sundar.
How did Google? Because Yahoo was the one. There was Bing. Remember Bing?
Chandler Bing.
Yes. Hotbot. Hotbot. Hotbot. Hotbot was another one. Ask Jeeves.
That was something. Oh yeah Jeeves.
Yeah. That was in the Gullman joke according to AskJeeves.com.
That didn't last. I don't think Sundar invented Google. Was Bill Gates Google?
Too Sundar. Microsoft.
I don't know. I suck. I think it's Larry Page.
Who's that? It's that guy. The guy with a bad haircut.
Yeah that's tough. It's funny how the richest people have the worst fucking
haircuts.
Yeah. Zuckerberg. That's true. Supercuts.
Yeah. He's got the bangs.
He does. It's weird.
He's not looking great. Who else? It's a short. It's a long list.
Who's that guy in Zuckerberg basically?
Yeah. It was an unearned premise on my part.
Beza. I mean Musk doesn't have great hair.
No.
So maybe he got something here.
Yeah. Beza is three.
Okay.
No one knows this guy. You'd have to bring a picture of him on stage.
Yeah.
Oh yikes.
Well he cleaned it up I guess.
Yeah. He's like the Robbie. What was that guy's name? Fuck. I forgot his name.
Robbie Prah?
No.
Robbie.
You know Robbie. The golf instructor. He got the haircut.
Golf instructor.
He's a comedian.
Oh.
He got Bernstein?
No. That's a different guy.
Comedian. He teaches golf.
Robbie Collier.
Oh Collier.
I didn't know he was a golf teacher.
I forgot about him.
Yeah. Robbie Collier.
He looked like that and then he got his hair all fixed up. He looks great.
Really?
Really.
I thought he looked okay before frankly.
Wow.
Yeah.
Well some women will tell you if you're going bald just own it baby.
Yeah.
That's what's hot in a man. Owning.
Yeah.
Well Bruce Willis made it kind of cool.
Yes.
He looked good bald.
Yeah.
He did.
Bruce Willis.
George Picard.
John Luke.
John Luke Picard.
Yeah.
Who's George Picard?
George Picard is another actor from-
That's George Pappard.
Pappard.
Yes.
He's in My Breakfast with Tiffany.
Statham.
Statham's hunk.
I think Ben Kingsley kind of has something.
He's Gandhi.
Yeah.
Sexy Beast.
Sexy Beast is solid.
Look at all these guys.
Black guys are different though.
Jason Kanner.
Jason Kanner sure.
There you go.
Travolta went bald.
Alan Lefkowitz.
The women are attracted to him.
Sarah talks about how they're attracted because he's really listening.
He's thoughtful and he's listening.
He fucked my ex-girlfriend.
It was fucked up, man.
What?
No.
Alan fucked my ex.
Whoa.
He fucked Judy Gold?
Oh, shit.
And my mom, dude.
Alan fucked my mom.
Well, no better guy to talk about it with.
Who else?
Who gave me some other bald dudes?
Bald and hot.
Prince William.
Yeah.
Stanley Tucci's kind of cute.
Ed Harris is hot.
Ed Harris has got something.
Women like Stanley Tucci for sure.
Oh, yeah.
I like him.
Would you?
Yeah.
I don't like how he tried to become Bourdain, though.
That kind of bugged me.
Yeah, a lot of guys tried.
I wish he'd kill himself.
What's his face?
What's that kind of name?
Cute guy.
Philip Rosenthal?
Phil Rosenthal tried a Bourdain thing.
The manager?
Vitor loves that show.
Really?
Yeah, he's Everybody Loves Raymond.
Yeah, that guy.
Yeah, people love that show.
He has his own show?
Yeah, he's got a food show on Netflix.
But isn't he Ray Romano's manager?
No.
No, he was the co-creator.
Co-creator of Where He Loves Raymond.
Ray Romano, I'll say, is the nicest dude on the planet.
The nicest comic.
Yes.
He's the only famous dude that pops into the cellar and is like, oh, I don't
want to bump
you, you know?
Yeah, yeah.
Everyone, every other famous person is like, I'm going to do an hour and a half.
You're going to fucking wait at the table.
You're not going to see your family for a while.
Ray Romano is literally like, no, just, you know, I don't want to inconvenience
you.
And you're like.
True.
Great guy and hilarious.
And hilarious.
Funny.
Funny comic.
Nice enough to do Ray Ellen's show.
Wow.
That's saying something.
That's nice.
Not Aruba.
No.
Okay.
He's not going there.
No, certainly not.
Tell your Aruba Tony Wood story.
This kills me.
Oh, I told it on Rogan and it bombed, but.
Oh, well, we're, we're, we're, we'll laugh.
He, everything goes over his, uh, talk about bald hot guys.
Oh, yeah.
He's, he's a bald hot guy.
He's bald.
Yeah.
Uh, Tony Woods.
Tony, I've probably, probably heard this story a million times.
Sorry, I'm a little hoarse from sporting events, but Tony Woods, uh, is in Aruba
and
he's late for every single show.
I love him.
And so.
Hilarious.
He's like in the eighth floor.
So he's late for every single show.
A hundred percent of the show.
The show is in the hotel room, but he's late every show.
It's in the, the ballroom.
So, yeah.
So Ray Ellen in the hotel.
Yeah.
Ray Ellen says, I got an idea.
I'll put him in the room across the hall.
That way he doesn't have to find his way.
I can just go and get him when it's time.
Wow.
So Ray Ellen, the first show of the second week, he goes over, he knocks on the
door
and he says, I just gave Dan Natterman the light.
And Tony Woods goes, all right, I'll jump in the shower.
He's a classic.
It's a two minute light.
He's a classic Tony Woods.
He really is.
He's always got his cavassier.
He's the ladies man.
You know, I feel like I've never connected with him because he's more of a, he's
a drinky
party guy and we'd never collided then.
I feel like if I knew him 10 years ago, we would have gone to some titty bars
and drank.
Right.
That guy's got hours of material.
He's a funny dude.
Yeah.
Classic.
And he does hours in one set, but I love the guy.
I'm a fan, but I've met him 500 times and he's like, hey, who are you, a young
brother?
And I'm like, yeah, yeah, we've met.
The first 30 times he was like, it's great to meet you.
And I'm like, it hurts every time.
I know.
Every time you say that.
There's a lot of guys like that.
Attell was like that for a long time.
Natterman is like that for quite a while.
It's these scatterbrainy kind of guys.
Once you get in, you're in, but it takes a minute.
Isn't that weird that we probably do that to people?
We've probably met young comics and they're like, hey, nice to meet you.
And they're like, oh my God.
You're probably right.
That's the therapy right there.
What do you mean?
That you have the awareness to just be like, oh, we've had our impact on young
comics.
Yeah.
That's you being in therapy.
Yeah.
Or it's ego being like, we're those guys now.
Either way.
Either way.
Or it's self-awareness.
I'll take your interpretation.
I took it as ego, but yeah.
Really?
Well, he flipped it.
But I think it's also just like the idea of being like, oh, this is our impact.
Like we're talking about these people.
This is what we do.
Sure.
Well, I do think that because I was talking about this the other day.
I remember being at, I went to the New York Film Academy, as did Mark back in
03.
You got that right.
And 