Name: Ep 159: Merry Queefmas (Ralph Barbosa, Carmen Lynch, Louis Katz, Santa Claus
Uploaded: 2023-12-25T02:00:02.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Ep 159: Merry Queefmas (Ralph Barbosa, Carmen Lynch, Louis Katz, Santa Claus' from We Might Be Drunk Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-12-25. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Ep 159: Merry Queefmas (Ralph Barbosa, Carmen Lynch, Louis Katz, Santa Claus' from We Might Be Drunk Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-12-25. Transcript available.

Ep 159: Merry Queefmas (Ralph Barbosa, Carmen Lynch, Louis Katz, Santa Claus

all right hey folks here we are we're here we're queer it's a beautiful 43
degree day in new york
city when we're taping i don't know what the actual christmas is gonna look oh
good point
well could we could be dead by then i'm climate change world war three yeah palestinians
uh what
else you got out there speaking of explosions i just dropped the negroni poop
the likes of which
that's you yeah that's you i believe it's a gingerbread man or boy thanks for
coming in bud
hey take your time hey how are you you again good to see you who are you with
sloth sloss yeah drank
with us oh yeah he's got a problem he's got a problem so wait while ralph's
putting on his uh
inmate outfit let's hear about the uh the night of too many stars oh i did a
spot last minute someone
dropped out obviously when you hear this lineup you're like yeah someone
dropped out john stewart
john stewart host okay uh john oliver chris rock wow uh adam sandler wow robert
schmeigel puts it
together too many stars uh with the jacket with the jacket i like it he's a
gingerbread guy but he's
like off the clock nice to meet you i don't think we've met in person right wow
nice to meet you
nice to meet you wow i didn't know that worlds are colliding so i did this
thing on monday night
too many stars the benefit show it used to be on tv yeah i remember that it's
like for autism and uh
oh i did one joke i shouldn't have fucking done too but i uh it's like i walk
in i'm like holy shit
that's harvey kytel whoa it's like people that you're like really that guy
doing here is he autistic
no no no no but he could play autistic he's good and i want to appreciate the
money you made for my
people but we we uh i go up and it's like you know you know gaffigans everyone's
there whatever i
i get off stage and it's like i did a couple jokes i shouldn't have done you
know you go into a joke
i have a joke with a punchline is a special ed moron or something i could have
cut that one probably
all right and uh and i get off and the first face i see is kytel and he's like
fucking harvey kytel hates me and then i turned it's steve bruschemi and he's
just like i could
have just been his face but uh that's like his face is always like that you
know and then i turn
funny looking and then i turn and it's uh and paul rudd goes yes wow bailed out
by rudd so many stars
yeah paul rudd's a funny dude i love he's funny yeah steve bruschemi's a little
funnier or whatever
that's my comedy opinion yeah steve bruschemi rules yeah uh big daddy he's the
uh the hobo
yeah yeah sausage mcmuffin yeah exactly even when he's not funny he's funny
yeah remember when he
got shot in the face on sopranos oh hilarious i thought you were gonna say fargo
he's been shot
in the face a lot yeah i never saw fargo fargo's fucking good i just remember
he's got the the
groceries and he's like with the keys and he's just like blam yeah pull that up
i use this to get hard
so oh this is jamie by the way she made us drinks jamo yeah we're having coquito
this is your second oh yeah thank you so much my first coquito ever no oh yeah
what is background
thank you um mexican oh yeah puerto rican it's not it's not everywhere i guess
coquito is like a
puerto rican thing yeah oh yeah okay better uh eggnog i think oh wow eggnog
either what does coquito
mean little coconut that's what it means but it's different that's really good
where it doesn't
yeah this is so good damn i usually hate coconut yeah it doesn't have eggs and
it has sweetened condensed
milk where eggnog has heavy like regular milk yeah sugar you just pull up with
a dad get shot in fargo
that was the wrong scene oh yeah he shoots oh yeah dude i pull back a second
right before he gets
shot it's the weirdest reaction to getting shot he's just like oof he's like
ooh
like that would have been a good pep though commercial
oh shot in the face and improved it
wow what a mood cohen brothers yeah you check out fargo that's a good one they
put him in a wood
chipper in the end yeah i'm still gonna watch it you can ruin endings for me i'll
still watch them
same what are you do you live in texas no yeah kind of wait for it oh what a
fucking shotgun
wow on the firewood did you guys ever watch barry yeah that that was a cool
that's cool how he dies
yeah he's like what he's like what did he say what's his last line he's like oh
wow bam
pull it up i didn't see the ending of the show so that's the last season i'm
sorry that's all right
this is such a spoiler note of a podcast that's what's considered a great show
bill hader's amazing
but it's funny that that's like a comedy yeah yeah comedy try watching that
before bed on the road
you're gonna want to slit your wrist it's incredible i mean the acting's insane
henry
winkler is like oh i love winkler by the way this is the difference between men
and women right here
there's no group of women sitting around going pull up when buscemi gets shot
in the face on a porch
whose whose desktop cover is that that's you is that from dog day afternoon you
got it yeah that's
bad that's badass it's christmas edition i put the package in there nice yeah
that'd make a good
halloween costume hmm yeah the suit is tough though because they're like what
are you doing like you
don't yeah nobody would know no except like big al pacino fans right i don't
know yeah you just look
like a dead maybe gay guys that movie's like a gay rights movie right trans
trans oh gay too kind of
right yeah in a way yeah it's all part of the lgbt plus q minus gene this is
barry so now i'm gonna
know how it ends there we go oh really gonna spoil it for this guy what season
are you on i'm i'm one
behind but i'll still watch it oh it's still an interesting season yeah all
right there you go
this is like the finale sorry guys wait where's buscemi i don't think he's in
this oh oh i thought
that's what we were doing are we not doing it i don't know ralph just brought
it up it's about it's
about to happen okay this is the long i don't even remember there's that there's
that meme i forgot who
did it but it's like uh dudes can just sit around and talk about like they can
just name role
players in the nba oh yeah that's what this is but like dude's getting shot in
the face right
what if i just got the movie wrong oh there you go
whoa ron white
oh wow oh that's fun all right all right all right i'll still watch it i feel
bad for people you know
died but that's got to be a cool way to die like getting shot yeah people
respect you automatically
for that you know teddy teddy roosevelt was shot and i think it helped him win
the uh the presidency
he got shot during a speech and then kept going why did he keep going he was
that tough was folded up
in his pocket so many times the bullet pierced the speech just got the blood
just got in him he finished
the speech and then went to the hospital there you go matter you know his
president uh presidency it
didn't help was jfk that's true didn't help his presidency yeah they told him
you should wear your
speech on your forehead and he didn't listen
who had that bit that biden is the only president you could punch assassinate
shank oh that's funny
that is hilarious you punch a punch anyway yeah i live in texas but i've been
coming to live here
every other week for a little while like for for a month maybe damn yeah might
as well get a condo or
something yeah that'd be cool i mean i stay at my friend's place in queens i
just go in on the rent with
him so i got like a like an apartment now i guess but i do want my own place
yeah i don't i don't know
how my stuff's like some in his room and then some in his living room but i don't
know i'm never home
anyway you know that's how i feel sometimes right we never i i looked i went to
my living room just
my you know other room i have two rooms and it's just two giant suitcases open
same yeah and that's
just my apartment always is you know yeah people are like you should clean your
room i'm like i'll be
there for a few hours right to pick some shit out maybe do some laundry and i'm
out that's it i feel
good like sleeping in transit me too yeah we're on that tour bus that was the
best sleep i got in a
long time oh man isn't that sad i feel the same way i did a bus this year and i
was like
i sleep like shit at home yeah i know the bus is where i was meant to be even i
even sleep better
on a plane than i do at home like all like stiff and stuff right but i don't
know somebody recorded
me sleeping at the airport that wasn't cool oh yeah i'd like sat on they tagged
you yeah they tagged
me i was like what a pretty funny whatever it is i'll punch them well they're
no i won't they're a
woman but i get my mom to punch them that was fucked up probably better it's a
woman a dude is it would
be worse i think oh i've been tagged by dudes recording me sleep is that legal
yeah well i usually
sleep at the airport maybe you're narcoleptic nah nah nah i can't sleep like at
night but once i'm at
the airport and i'm like 15 minutes till we board then i'm just like all right
all right i'm the same
way the body knows it like starts to go into shutdown mode and then there's a
delay a 15 minute delay and
you're just like that you threw everything off yeah now i'm fucked for the day
it's all it's all hinging
on that it's got to be an on-time departure 6 a.m flight that's why i mostly
fly southwest they're the most
consistent but i don't know one time well a few times i flew delta and i liked
having like comfort
plus or even like first class but there's been two delta flights that get
delayed and i'm just like
nah i can't risk it right can't risk you fly in day of yeah i'll fly in day
same yeah these you do a
day early sometimes only the only way i'll do a day he's a nerd the only way i'll
do it is if it's two
theater shows in a night okay if it's one show i'll risk it but if it's two i'm
like i'm
fucking myself all right all right if it's a club i always go day of yeah i
haven't done theaters yet
so i'm yeah i'll take back the nerd thing yeah we'll go theaters next year say
january yeah yeah
yeah man i first saw you on i think the first bit i saw of you i forgot even
the song it was but you're
like it was a rapper who bragged about going speed limit oh quavo that's
fucking that's a great bit
yeah he won't open my dms yeah but yeah no thank you yeah i like that i like
that one that one got me
some followers but i am like damn i can't really do that on the road now right
because people know
it yeah sometimes people will yell it like do that one and i'm like nah that's
weird no but that's nice
though that he's getting requests it's flattering but you're like but you heard
it it's funny when
it's a dip like it depends on the comics i remember like many years ago i'm
opening for gary goldman
and people were like grapes it's funny the bits that like you know you can tell
the type of comic you are
yeah gafkin said there's a guy who follows him all to all his gigs and dresses
a hot pocket and he's
outside dancing and you're like damn that is the height of that's funny once
yeah but he goes all his
gigs i don't know i feel like that would be pretty funny like all the time just
never acknowledge the
guy yeah see how long he does it for yeah because it doesn't ruin the act he's
just outside the first
time in like the 19th time yeah every other time right right right this guy the
first time and then
that time where you're like you're still doing this oh yeah i like that yeah
man so what is like you've
been on you've been out with like birth this year and you've been on the road
like this year you've
been really going hard right yeah yeah i guess so it's been all right you know
you get lots of free
stuff which is cool yeah this is how fast his rise is this guy hosted for me 10
minutes ago and then now
netflix i got an agent after that they're like you hosted for mark norman
it was harvey we want to get you on the road yeah yeah that yeah i hosted for
you at uh
what was it arlington improv that was it yeah