Name: Ep 168: Fahim Anwar & Sam Tallent
Uploaded: 2024-02-26T02:00:04.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Ep 168: Fahim Anwar & Sam Tallent' from We Might Be Drunk Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-02-26. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Ep 168: Fahim Anwar & Sam Tallent' from We Might Be Drunk Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-02-26. Transcript available.

Ep 168: Fahim Anwar & Sam Tallent

hey folks here we are we might be drunk i'm hungover you're looking fresh you
haven't drank
in what a week i drank on rogan oh okay and that richard jefferson episode sent
me the
bad because i had an ulcer that i was like i was something's wrong i i don't
want to be the
party pooper yeah we got an nba player here drinking with us you got that right
i drank
both of us oh yeah and uh yeah and that next morning i was like fuck got the
endoscopy yesterday and i
was yeah goddamn wow lives from the comedy cellar you need someone to pick you
up because they
it's like an abortion they gotta we gotta get you home i got propofol whatever
the michael oh really
knocked me the fuck out whoa and it's and you have to fight not to make because
they put the thing in
your mouth and it's the big tube yeah big circle you have to fight not to be
like no dicks in here
you know but uh yeah i uh i woke up like whoa and i did three sets you saw me i
did three sets last
night because devito's running the hour i want to be there to yeah report very
impressive so what
what does an ulcer feel like is it burning it's stinging kind of it's just like
sharp like really
upper abdominal ah oh man that's not silent reflux or acid reflux it's kind of
it's kind of
similar okay yeah because uh our friend joe list has silent reflux and he gets
the cobblestone
throat it it bubbles up oof yeah it's all gross it's gross i think of the guy
in dumb and dumber
my ulcer yeah yeah i need my pills that's uh ketchup mustard classic dude yeah
i was i was
i was under man it was uh i was fucking out of it what a wild man you're under
the you're under the
gun at the at the hospital in a hospital gown propofol michael jackson then you
go do sets
yeah i well you know i had some coffee i was fine which also though like chill
with the coffee i'm
like i can't wake up with that i'm on propofol oh yeah true i gotta wake up bet
you slept pretty
good though i was fucking out dude it's pretty crazy how hard that knocks you
out you got any more
i could i could use a nap oh it felt good yeah i bet there's no sleep better
than a
pill induced i got a crazy one for you so did i tell you i lost my laptop no i
left my laptop
on i went to dallas i left my laptop on in the seat completely my fault it was
a brain fart the tray
was broken yeah i usually throw it on try to edit some shit do some joke
writing whatever
and uh it was broken so i was like i'll just put it in here read a book put it
in there totally
forgot it oh terrible system yep i call i i realized once i'm in the hotel i'm
like i left my fucking
laptop brutal damn it i'm trying to edit jokes i'm trying to it's so much
harder i'm doing the notebook
which is great yeah for writing but it's a little it's annoying to like shift
stuff of course but uh
i call and of course there's a million hoops to go through they keep sending
into people who are like
i don't know right and then they go it takes 14 days to get from the plane to
lost and found
i was like and i said well that's a bad system yeah two weeks you got to be
aware that that's bad
they're like it's not great that's a fortnight i said to the woman on the phone
you i could buy a pill
that will kill a baby today and she was like i don't know how that helps you i'm
like it doesn't
but i'm trying to make a point yes yes lost and found is a lot of work to do to
catch up
right you probably get a gun quicker than that too 10 days probably 10 days
background check i would
say probably 10 right give it a goog isn't that crazy yeah and you could be
mentally ill and get
a gun you lose your gun well you can't bring your gun to flight i guess but
that's true yeah they get
that uh they get that at security you don't have a bit like this do you i was
going to run this by
you maybe we'll just do in the pod i have a joke about so you know i ran i
started this joke on
the pod it's hitting but i go uh you know guns they're like a baby you know
they're uh
you know they're easy to hate but then you hold one and you're like and you're
like uh that's great
and you're like yeah it's kind of cool i get it guns like babies both annoying
on airplanes
yeah uh both uh if you date someone new you're like this could be a problem
both gonna be in a school soon oh that's great anything like that no no i had a
holding my guns
are like dicks if you whip it out it's it scares people you know they're don't
hopefully it's not
loaded mine sawed off
but this is great gun jokes something about how they're loud yeah oh yeah there's
a lot here
the silencer on yes yes especially on a plane yeah that's good gun rifle uzi
you were just in
in boise yeah that's a fucking bitch of a flight bitch of a flight had to go a
day early i hate the
day early you know me unless you have two shows you're like i'm going early for
one show yes the
two show night you're like all right it's a lot to roll the dice on if i land
you know but
totally one show brutal but i gotta say boise all the way on the other side of
the country
idaho they love comedy they appreciate comedy it's sold out quick um and the
crowd the crowd was
killer so had a great time and boise is a cute little town it's clean it's
quiet it's nice
yeah everyone's friendly there because the dudes are like six eight they're
like big honkies they're
like peters they look like paul bunyan yeah paul a lot of patagonia a lot of ll
bean
all that shit yeah it's kind of like uh those a lot of those cities have like
they all feel like
burlington yes exactly the mountains are in the distance and i'm at a coffee
shop i'm like so
what's the thing with boise because i'm trying to get material for the for the
local jokes and i'm
like uh give me what do you got here what's the what's the delicacy what's a
motto something and
they all go huh yeah i don't know like you grew up here like lived here 40
years i'm like give me
something about the town they're like well we got scenery we got hiking and i'm
like go you can i mean
new york it's like pizza subway rats wall street you know there's a million
things happening for
something's happening you can say anything yeah migrants beating up cops i can
give you something
something yeah 9-11 uh pizza gate who the hell knows but uh yeah they have
nothing but there there
it is it's a cute town we always say veter and i always say you can always tell
it's a good coffee
shop on the road if it's a trans barista they're gonna make you a good latte it's
like you're like
all right that's so true yeah little cool coffee shop if there's got a a trans
barista always i went
to one in boise called district me and andy haynes uh had had coffee there and
wrote some jokes i can't
believe you used to not drink coffee because it's like such a central part of
our lives you know it's
huge yeah i can't live without it now when i'm hung over the first thing i just
go right for that
coffee and i feel like it helps a hangover like 30 percent we you know what we
need
is a bodega cat coffee once you get bodega cat like really bodega cat.com bodega
cat whiskey.com
oh yeah but uh i think like we get similar flavors with like a a bourbon coffee
it'd be really cool
love it that's a great idea and it's not uh illegal or whatever this has been a
fucking nightmare
we'll get it guys keep if you can get us distribution help it's we're about to
dip in
our own fucking pockets and we're trying to beat dos oros those cunts we had it
we had a liquor first
we're gonna go storm the pat mcafee show awkwardly and try to push our our hooch
that's it do they
promote on pat mcafee oh they stumbled on there it was awkward and weird really
yeah i mean it was
funny bert took his shirt off they had some some young uh quarterback like this
hot cool black guy
and he's like who the fuck are you he was trying to hawk his energy drink and
it was a funny moment
it's so funny how famous they are in our world yeah they do arenas but like you
know you know
you're a quarterback you're still like what exactly that's not my world i know
he was like 22 he's
like who is this what do you do why is this guy shirtless he's doing push-ups
that was great
well it's like when howard stern was at a courtside game and he was mad none of
the players
recognize him it's like well dude it's 2024 right they were gonna recognize you
in 98
yeah they're like is that angelica houston who is that share
yeah there you go i didn't know that meant two bears i guess that makes sense
yeah that's cool
vodka is a tougher world it's a tougher world yeah competitive because the top
shelf vodkas
are like i mean goose ain't going nowhere cat one ain't going nowhere right
like and i thought
him and tito's were like in cahoots but i guess he's going against tito's we
got to figure this out
dude yes we will we're pushing it baby oh they already got more merch than us
they're killing it
god our merch is cool dude we got good merch they got cool merch so it looks
good stop promoting them
we need more help than they do they're huge brought it up there we go there's
some merch no way did you
really make we might be drunk shoes what holy shit did trump inspire you that
is hilarious who the
fuck's wearing these i don't know i mean go buy them immediately sure awesome
but our faces are on
there i don't know about that that's that's rough i don't know with like a suit
that could look kind
of cool that's true i can't do a high top i got i got sensitive ankles i'm not
a big high top guy
either i don't like the constriction i feel it i wear them sometimes but i don't
even for basketball
they used to like tell you you have to wear high tops in the 90s and now now
all the players are
wearing low tops i know did you pump no i love that rock snl thing what was
that the thanksgiving
just pump it you don't remember that we got to pull that pump is big hey what's
up yeah sit down all
the way from los angeles where were you before this oh all right nice i just
did sodas oh yeah
he gives you a pack of cards what i didn't get a packet what it's a new thing
he does i swear to god
like i almost cried because i haven't gotten a pack of cards since i was like
13 uh hoops nba hoops
i love that what the hell what the hell it's like flowers for men honestly dude
like yeah i had to
take i i went through like a flashback of when i was 13 and shit uh because
when's the last time as a
grown man you've like i haven't and so like the whole ritual of it and shit oh
yeah it was awesome
you never did the comic book cards did you no i never got into that it was more
my speed a little
bit like marvel yeah that was what's the big one to get like spider-man rookie
card i don't know
parker in high school yeah uncle joe what is it uncle ben that's like getting a
coach card the
uncle ben card yeah is this with great power comes great responsibility like
fuck this i have a million
of these they remade spider-man so many times it's like i know that's why the
spider-verse one was
kind of cool because it was like at least they went a different way for once
well let's take a bet
what are there more spider-mans or fast and furious spider-mans i'm gonna say
furious oh there's 10
furious there's so many fucking furiuses a lot of furious i feel like the
franchise really hit its
stride when they did away with maybe there are more there's so many when they
did away with what
physics uh because they were they were like grounded in reality you know they
were having writer's
block after number three right then they're like okay what if we don't do
physics yeah like i always
imagine they had like a physics consultant in the room and then he kept on squashing
all the great
ideas and they're like you want to like stand outside like we'll call you when
we need you
physics are real tell that to paul walker oh my god all right he uh that is so
weird man like
dying dying that way i know that's like luke scott's like uh what's his name
mark hamill really
getting his hand cut off yeah that's crazy i was in the theater salvo cano used
to do a thing
where they wo