Name: Patton Oswalt w/ Sam Morril & Mark Normand - We Might Be Drunk Podcast
Uploaded: 2025-08-18T01:00:43.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Patton Oswalt w/ Sam Morril & Mark Normand - We Might Be Drunk Podcast' from We Might Be Drunk Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-08-18. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Patton Oswalt w/ Sam Morril & Mark Normand - We Might Be Drunk Podcast' from We Might Be Drunk Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-08-18. Transcript available.

Patton Oswalt w/ Sam Morril & Mark Normand - We Might Be Drunk Podcast

Hey, we're here. We're doing it. We might be drunk. We got Patton Oswalt with
the tea.
Hello, having tea. I can't day drink anymore. I'm too old, kids.
Yeah, this is an early one. That's because of us. But we were talking about Red
Bank,
New Jersey. Killer room. Count Basie. I had seen Lily Tomlin there like way
back in the day.
Amazing show. She was like redoing, it was like topical material and then she
redid
search for signs of intelligent life. Oh, yeah. Great show. Hell yeah. Yeah.
Ellie Wong is a special
there. It's a big one for specials. It's a great room. Because the interior is
gorgeous. Beautiful.
Beautiful. Cool staff. But I went there. I'm like filming my own tour doc type
movie and
my publicist was driving me and I have Rachel Feinstein in the car with me too.
She's playing
my publicist in the thing. And the publicist is like a dumbass. That's like the
character. My
publicist is like, I'm not stupid. I'm like, we were the whole time. We're like,
you're kind of stupid
though in a lot of ways. Like you're kind of incompetent. She's like, I'm not.
We get there
early to film. She pulls up and she goes, you're going to kill me. I'm like,
what happened?
She goes, we're at Count Basie Hall, not Count Basie Theater. I'm like, what
does that mean?
And she goes, we're 90 minutes away. And I was like, we're literally making a
movie about
how dumb you are. And you drove us to the wrong venue.
You gave us such a perfect scene. And she just kind of had to take us just abusing
her for the
rest of the ride there. Wait a second. Did you advertise you were at the Count
Basie Theater
or the Count Basie Hall? Theater. Oh no, she just made it. It was just a brain
fart. She just put
in the wrong venue into her GPS. She drove us there. She's like, I'll drive.
Let us, let me drive.
What I'm saying is where the tick, like on your website, did it say Count Basie
Theater? So when you get to
Count Basie Hall, there was no one there or they knew to go to the right one.
No, no. Everyone else knew to go there.
My publicist drove us. She insisted on driving us. Yeah. And I was like, I was
like, oh, thank you so
much for driving us. And then of course, wrong venue. We get there. I had all
these like childhood
friends there. I had like this kid I grew up with who's like, he's, he's like
drinks the same amount
he did in eighth grade when he was like an alcoholic. No, no, no. And he
brought like eight of his
friends and he's like, can I bring them all back? And I was like, yeah, fine.
And he walks up to my
publicist and he's like, he's like, dude, she's fucking hot. And I was like,
aren't you like seeing
somebody's like, yeah, we just got engaged. I was like, okay. He corners my
publicist and
he goes, can I get your number? Wow. I was like, where's your wife? She's right
out there.
The fucking brother-in-law, the whole family. I was like, what the fuck is
happening?
What was he arguing? Look, we're only engaged. I still have some time.
That's true. What am I supposed to do? It was, it was crazy. It was a, it was a
weird night.
But yeah, that is the flaw of GPS. Cause they, they have like, I have a street
and it's this place,
parkway, you know, lane and they'll fuck you so easily. Yeah. I told her on the
way back,
make sure to put it in Manhattan, New York. Don't take us to Kansas right now.
I remember I did the Count Basie theater and I went in and you know how
gorgeous the interior
is like all that. So I was like, wow, look at all this. And then they went,
yeah. And they pointed
up to like some little bit of architectural detail. And there was this weird,
still kind of shiny,
wet stain of some kind of substance that had splattered on there. It was really
high up too.
I was like, whoa. And then they just went Gallagher.
Gallagher had been in there the night before and they, they go, we did the best
we could to clean,
but he hit something at just the right angle. It went so goddamn high.
The one on the left is Cosby.
I never thought of Gallagher leaving. Theaters must have hated Gallagher.
I never thought. I just knew audiences and people.
It's crazy. He got to theaters with that shtick.
Oh yeah. That was huge.
No, I saw, I saw him at the fucking Kennedy Center back in the 80s.
The Kennedy Center.
Damn.
And it was a goddamn mess.
Well, Gigi Allen wasn't as messy as him. It was an easier cleanup after Gigi
Allen than it was Gallagher.
Yes. Ozzy eating a bat left less of a imprint, but his wordplay I thought was
pretty damn good.
I know people hate him.
Didn't he walk off Marin's interview?
He did.
Oh yeah.
Come on, Gallagher.
Yeah.
One of the greatest lines ever in podcast history.
Come on, Gallagher.
You hear, you hear the hotel door slam.
Oh yeah.
It was perfect.
Damn.
Yeah, it's like a national lampoon radio skit or something.
And then he had a brother that was Gallagher too.
There's a whole, we did a documentary on Gallagher.
I don't know if we do.
No, we need an A24, like, weird Ari Aster horror film about the two brothers
and the weird fighting.
Yeah, because he had his brother go do smaller venues.
With the same act?
Same, because he was so popular that he was getting all these booking requests.
And he's like, well, I want, I want all that money too.
So he like, his brother got a nominal fee and then he also got a cut of that.
He wanted to get all these gigs and then the brother.
And he's like, but you got to stay a certain size theater.
You can't go above a certain size theater.
You can't go in certain territories.
And I think the, what I heard was the brother went out and really kind of
caught the bug.
Like, hey, this is awesome.
And just started booking the bigger venues.
Like, I think I'm better than the original.
And that's what he did.
Wow.
And as weird as that sounds, I was just, there's this great podcast called A
History of Rock and
500 songs.
So good.
And so the, they do one on Little Richard and Little Richard was so popular.
2D4D was so massive that he got all these booking offers.
Like, just like more than he, there's no way he could do them.
Like physically, he couldn't be there.
So they found Little Richard impersonators because people really didn't know
what he looked
like.
They just knew what he sounded like.
People that could do him and they would send him to all these other venues and
just be Little
Richard.
And one of those Little Richard impersonators later on, uh, went back to his
real name.
Uh, James Brown.
Oh my God.
James Brown started as a Little Richard impersonator going like, you get this
chunk of the
money and the rest goes to us, goes to the Little Richard corporation.
Wow.
So he, he was out doing Little Richard gigs.
Wow.
Amazing.
That's crazy.
That is crazy.
It's also like back in the day, Jim Carrey doing standup was like all
impressions.
And then one day I think it was, he said Dangerfield was like, just be yourself.
Right.
Just be you.
You'll do better.
And it's like, you know, shit.
And it took him a while to find that.
He would bomb a lot before he figured out the all righty then.
And he said, that's what it clicked.
But if you can just click into Clint Eastwood or all these accounts.
Of course.
It's like, fuck, it must be hard.
And it kills.
And do it like that well.
Yeah.
You know, it's like, um, as funny as Dan Soder's material is, some of his
impressions are so
goddamn good.
But he fights it.
Like if I could do Soder's impressions, I would just, I would jump into that.
I know.
Well, if I could do the impressions at the level that Soder can do them, I was,
I remember
I was talking to him and said, you know, if you were an evil person, you could
cause
some real problems in these people's lives.
Like calling up, like, there's no difference in what, and he never had to say
like, and
now I'm going into this person.
Right.
He would go into the voice and I was like, the fuck dude?
How, it was really eerie.
He's like the original deep fake.
Yes.
But he, did you ever see that episode where he called in to like CNN or
something as Dave
Chappelle?
Soder did that?
And it worked.
They were like, oh, we got an interview with Dave.
This is great.
And he just bullshitted them for like 20 minutes on a podcast.
You never heard about this?
No.
This is huge.
Pull it up.
Holy shit.
Oh yeah.
Cause I know that, um, there's a, uh, there was a couple of DJs in LA, uh,
Kevin and Bean.
Yes.
And they would do, uh, Jerry Lewis, one of the, I think it was either Ralph Garman
did Jerry Lewis and they called France during the Iraqi war and they somehow
got through
to the French president.
Oh my God.
And they had to go to commercial because the man was just like, this isn't it.
Like, cause it all happened on the air.
Like they were talking.
He's like, hello, I just want to hope that you would bled your, and, and, but
he wasn't
doing the crazy over there.
He was like the way when Jerry, I can't do it, but when Jerry Lewis tries to
act serious
and talk, and it just sounds exactly like him.
So you could see the president was like, ah, Jerry, it's so nice to, uh, that
you called
and, and, and apparently the management was like, we could go to federal prison
for this.
Why is the FBI using comedians?
Like all these guys to like call in, call in is like a whole manie or somebody.
Who better to do it than Jerry Lewis?
So we got a number of random phone numbers in Paris and we decided to call
people up in
Paris and I would do Jerry Lewis and tell them that we still want to be friends
here in
America.
Okay.
They don't even have, um, there isn't even a clip of the call cause that can't
be on
YouTube.
Oh wow.
Like it was all immediately taken down.
Oh yeah.
But it went out over the air alive.
I remember when, cause I was driving around, I remember when it happened.
And I was like, is he, cause I thought, oh, they're calling.
They, they got another comedian, the other line to be the French president and
they went
to commercial and came back and Kevin and me were like, okay, uh, we've just
been talking
to a management and we would like to, uh, preemptively appell it.
Like they were really freaking out.
Yeah.
I bet.
Wait, go back.
You had it.
You had it.
It was him talking about it.
You went back.
You had it right there.
Yeah.
Right.
The first, the first video, the big one, the big one, the bottom of the bottom.
Jesus Christ, dad.
That's 28 minutes.
Well, I'm looking for a clip.
I see.
So he did this live on a show, but he got through to CNN.
Fox news.
I was wrong.
Oh, yeah.
Cause they wanted an interview about like all the trans jokes.
And he was like, ah, fuck it.
Let's call him.
And it worked.
Holy shit.
So this is live on the, how is the crowd not losing it laughing?
They were.
And Lewis has to be like, shh.
Yeah, shut the fuck up.
Yeah.
Oh, here it is.
Hello.
Hey, how are you doing?
Hey, I'm good.
I'm on a train.
So apologies.
Can you hear me?
Oh, it's quite all right.
I'm sorry.
I just want to call you real quick.
Cause I know I only have about four minutes.
That's okay.
I have a 1% battery.
Oh, I just, I wanted to get in quick and talk to you about Lewis J. Gomez.
He's one of the funniest people I've ever met in my life.
Yes.
This is a point they should have known it wasn't Dave.
Holy shit.
Apparently when Kevin Pollack was doing a movie with Alan Arkin, he would call
up the director
or producer as Alan Arkin on the phone and like make weird like demands for the
next day.
And then they would come and they'd go, we have like the muffins you wanted.
And I was like, what are you talking about?
And then he, Kevin just said, one day he gets a message on the machine.
No more phone calls, Kevin.
No more phone calls.
It's not funny.
Like he was real.
Cause he just sounded exactly like Alan.
Yeah.
Damn.
Yeah.
Pollack's a weird power to have.
He's in a lot of great movies.
Oh yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He's in like a few good men.
You're in a lot of great, I was looking at your IMDB before we came here.
I was like, holy shit.
I mean, obviously like.
Don't get me started on the fan.
Oh, big fan.
Yeah.
The