Name: Super Bowl, Drones, Valentine's Day Grift | Monday Morning Podcast 2-10-25 | Bill Burr
Uploaded: 2025-02-10T19:43:43.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Super Bowl, Drones, Valentine's Day Grift | Monday Morning Podcast 2-10-25 | Bill Burr' from Bill Burr on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-02-10. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Super Bowl, Drones, Valentine's Day Grift | Monday Morning Podcast 2-10-25 | Bill Burr' from Bill Burr on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-02-10. Transcript available.

Super Bowl, Drones, Valentine's Day Grift | Monday Morning Podcast 2-10-25 | Bill Burr

Hey, what's going on? It's Bill Burr and it's time for the Monday Morning
Podcast for Monday, February 10th, 2025.
What's going on? How are ya? What's going on? How are ya?
I'm still here in New York, obviously, doing this fucking, well, not obviously,
obviously, me, still doing this gig.
I can't get fucking acclimated to this time. Every fucking night I'm laying in
bed till like 2, 3 in the morning.
And I'm tired as shit. I don't know. I don't know what the deal is.
Oh, Billy fucking sports fan. Oh, Billy sports fan. I went to a Bruin. It just
worked out.
It just worked out. I went to the Bruins game against the Rangers on like
Monday or Tuesday last week.
And then say night, I went to the Knicks game against the Celtics.
It's funny. It was a fucking 830 game, right?
So, I'm there with another buddy of mine. He's a Celtics fan. You know, the guy's
a Knicks fan.
And, you know, it's an 830 game. East Coast, 830. And I'm like, where the fuck
is it at 830?
And they go, it's the national game. Celtics start the game.
Jason Tatum. What he did all night. A little crossover move. Nobody touches him.
And he just fucking two-handed dunk on some poor bastard on the Knicks.
Took the garden out of the game quick.
The Knicks thing now, we're up like 17, 18 fucking points quick.
This is the national game.
So, you know, the refs start calling, you know, anything that we're doing or
whatever.
And we're all just laughing. Even the Knicks fan.
He goes, yeah, he's got to keep it close. It's the national game, right?
I don't even know where the fuck we are.
Like, the level...
You know what was fun about corruption when I was young?
It was... They at least tried to hide it.
You get these fucking refs just wide open.
You can fucking bet on sports at the arena.
You can see Kyle and hold some sort of fucking governmental position.
I wasn't seeing Kyle.
I did a gig Saturday night after the game.
I was walking in the snow.
Walking in the snow.
By the way, this whole fucking new thing with fucking guys wearing shorts in
the wintertime.
It was fucking snowing out.
It was that awful snow.
Not the fun snow.
That makes your girlfriend go like, yay, it's so beautiful.
It was that wet snow where it's almost rain, but it's not.
And it's not snow.
And it's going sideways.
And this fucking jerk-off comes up the street.
You know, he's got this...
You know those big winter coats you'll see a homeless person have?
You know, they just grab whatever coat they can find so it's ill-fitting.
Maybe they beat up a homeless guy bigger than them so they're fucking walking.
He had a big fucking coat like that, you know.
Snow boots on and then shorts.
The fucking shorts thing.
It's like, I get it.
You don't get cold.
You know?
That's the male version of a chick with like fake titties.
Like wearing them out, you know.
Barely covering them.
And then being like, what?
It's fucking...
It's just comfortable.
What are you looking at?
Yeah.
These fucking male attention whores.
Get a fucking personality and a pair of pants.
Fucking walking around, I run hot.
It's like fucking 31 degrees out.
What the fuck are you talking about?
Walking around in goddamn shorts.
And here's the thing.
I know some people run hot.
But like this whole wearing shorts in the fucking wintertime or all year round.
That is a new phenomenon in the last like 20 years.
Last 20 years.
So...
I don't know.
Or maybe it isn't that.
Maybe it isn't a fucking...
Fashion.
I don't know.
I just...
I always look at shit like that.
Just being like...
All right.
That person like...
Doesn't know how to tell a story.
Doesn't know how to talk to women.
So they got to do something to steal focus.
You're wearing shorts.
But they don't get...
No!
Then we got to fucking talk about your legs.
Anyway.
And let's just say...
Let's just say it isn't a desperate attempt to get fucking attention.
You know?
Like a hipster.
Picking somebody off a fucking...
What is that?
The worst app ever.
That picture one.
Pim...
Pim...
Not Pimsleur.
It's a language app.
What's the fucking...
Pinterest.
That is the worst, most confusing fucking whatever that is.
They got the coolest fucking pictures.
You can't share them with anybody.
And then like...
The whole thing is just fucking erratic.
I can't figure it out.
But they got great pictures.
Oh, I'll tell you.
They got great pictures.
Okay?
The hell was my goddamn point?
Yeah.
The hipsters.
It's like they go on there.
And they just pick a guy from like...
1974 to 1982.
And they're like...
I'm dressing like that guy.
At least they do in Los Angeles.
I don't know if they...
Maybe in Brooklyn too.
I don't know.
Let's just...
Okay, Bill.
Let's not be a cunt.
Let's just say maybe they run hot.
I run hot.
Well, then how come you're wearing a jacket?
If you run hot, wouldn't you just walk down the street?
Like it was springtime?
And if you do run hot, like what is happening to your junk in July?
Wait a minute.
You run so hot that like you and your woman, you're trying to have a baby.
And you literally cannot do it in the summertime.
Because your balls and your junk are just so fucking just heated up.
It cooks your sperm.
Gross.
Right?
So in the wintertime, in order to have like viable sperm, you got to walk...
Like...
All right, honey.
Let's try tonight.
All right.
Wait a second.
I got to put my shorts on and walk around the block in the snow.
Ah, cool down my jizz.
Here we go.
Anyway, so I went over to Gotham Comedy Club.
Had a fucking shitty set.
Had a fucking shitty set.
I just wasn't like...
I mean, the crowd was good and everything.
And the show went okay.
But like, I just wasn't flowing.
Anyway, dude, I saw a fucking amazing, amazing movie.
Arguably, the greatest movie, if you grew up in the 70s and you just want to go
back to it
and see, like, the greatest documentation of how dirty this country was in the
early 70s.
How brown everything looked.
And all of these fucking wannabe Cadillac, four-door fucking sleds that you
just...
Like, all of these cars that I...
Like, the cars that you forgot you remembered.
If that makes any sense.
Like, oh my God.
I remember seeing...
Who makes that fucking car?
And I was missing on all of them.
Is that a Buick?
No, it's a Pontiac.
Pontiac, what?
What the fuck is that?
So anyway, they have this...
The same guy...
I should have got these names.
The same guy that choreographed the car chase in Bullet.
Stars Roy Scheider.
I'm sorry, I didn't even say the name of the movie.
It's called The Seven Ups.
And the full movie is on YouTube for free.
Now, I don't like watching movies for free.
I have no problem paying for them.
I usually, you know, rent them for $3.99 on YouTube.
YouTube low-key has better fucking movies than most streaming services.
Because they have, like, you know, random, obscure...
Like, they don't give a fuck about an algorithm.
It's like, if you upload it, it's there, right?
So, anyway, Roy Scheider.
But the guy who choreographed the car chase in Bullet.
Steve McQueen in that Shelby Mustang.
And then the bad guys were in like that.
I don't know what the fuck it was.
I'm so bad.
Someday, I'm going to sit down and learn the Hemi shit.
Some sort of Chrysler Dodge.
I don't know what the fuck it was.
But it's a badass car, right?
And so he does this one.
And this one...
I'll be honest with you.
I can't even name...
It was a...
I want to say that the car was like a four-door fucking Pontiac.
It was a sled.
And then the other one was some rip-off of a Mustang or some Hemi shit.
I don't even know who made it.
Roy Scheider's in that one.
And they have this car chase.
And it's just like Bullet, where Steve McQueen was driving by himself.
Roy Scheider's driving by himself.
And then there's the two bad guys.
So the two bad guys...
There's a guy in the passenger seat named Richard Lynch, who was also in Scarecrow
with Pacino and Gene Hackman.
And he's a fucking unbelievable actor.
Un-fucking-believable actor.
And he's the other bad guy.
He's in the passenger seat.
And what's amazing is he plays scared.
Like, that's his choice.
Like, he's fucking concerned.
And it really makes the scene, like, come alive.
Because the way the first one, both bad guys were, like, stoic.
You know?
Like, that worked in a way.
But having somebody at least address what the fuck they're doing.
And by the way, they're racing all along the Upper West Side.
They go over the George Washington Bridge.
And they sort of fudge it.
Because they go over the George Washington Bridge like they're going into New
Jersey.
And then they somehow end up on, like, the Merritt Parkway.
Like, you're going up to Westchester.
It is a fucking amazing, amazing car chase.
And there's a nod to Jane Mansfield in the car chase.
If you guys know that fucking story.
Um, anyway.
Absolutely.
I, you know, out of five stars, I give it, for cars, I give it six stars.
Absolutely incredible.
And, um, I've been trying to think, you know, now that I, uh, I sold my Jaguar.
And I don't have a, I don't have a daily driver.
Um, I want to, I'm going to get one of those fucking cars.
One of those big fucking living room cars.
It's got to figure out, like, which one.
Um, it's so funny.
The interiors on those cars are ridiculous.
It's like you're driving around in a living room.
It's unbelievable.
So, anyway.
That, that movie is incredible.
And then I also saw, um, I went out yesterday and I saw The Brutalist.
Jesus Christ.
They should have called that movie The Fucking Brutalist.
Because it is fucking brutal.
Um, not in a bad way.
Just, uh, what the characters go through is fucking brutal.
Um, long-ass movie, too.
Um, it had an intermission, which I can't remember the last time I went to a
movie.
It had a 15-minute fucking intermission.
And I went out with a friend of mine.
And we're looking at each other like, dude, what the, how long is this fucking
movie?
Because we were going to go to the movie and then get something to eat down in
Chinatown over there.
And, um, the acting in it is, is, is, uh, is incredible.
Um, so I guess it's not already.
Sorry, I'm not on time here.
Um, it was nominated to, uh, for a whole bunch of awards and everything.
And I can see why, uh, performances in there were fucking incredible.
So, um, anyway, that, that thing ends.
And, uh, you know, it was a six o'clock movie.
We got out at like 10 o'clock.
Um, and we were laughing, going like, you know, if that was on TV,
I don't know if I would have made it, like, I would have, with my ADD, I wouldn't
have made it through it.
So I was so glad I went and I saw it in the movie theater.
Um, but it doesn't drag.
It, like, somehow went by really fast.
Um, but I didn't have the distractions or anything like that.
Um, and also if you watch it at home, it's three hours and 35 minutes, but that's
with the credits.
Credits take five minutes.
So it's three and a half hours.
Um, but anyway, so we're walking out of the movie theater.
And, uh, then we're going over, walking over to, like, Chinatown.
And at this point, it's late and it's Sunday night.
And I'm trying to figure out, you know, we're trying to find a place that's
open or whatever.
And we're talking about, uh, the movie and shit.
And I walked by and it was so funny.
And I looked and the Super Bowl was still going.
That's what fucking, I just, it's so fucking awful.
Why the Super Bowl has to be that goddamn fucking long.
Um, I went to the game last year and I swear to God, when they go to commercial
and you're sitting in the stadium, how fucking long it is.
It just kills all the fucking drama of it.
It's the only sport that does that.
It's the only fucking sport where it gets to the most important game of that
sport.
And then the game is so in the fucking background.
Who's performing at halftime?
How much do you think that commercial cost?
We normally run three, four commercials between, you know, commercial breaks.
Now we're going to run eight.
So, anyway, um, my prediction on the game was that if they let him play, uh,
the Eagles could beat him and Saquon was going