Name: Breakthroughs, A Bike Ride, The Valley | Thursday Afternoon Monday Morning Podcast 12-4-25
Uploaded: 2025-12-05T03:13:48.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Breakthroughs, A Bike Ride, The Valley | Thursday Afternoon Monday Morning Podcast 12-4-25' from Bill Burr on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-12-05. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Breakthroughs, A Bike Ride, The Valley | Thursday Afternoon Monday Morning Podcast 12-4-25' from Bill Burr on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-12-05. Transcript available.

Breakthroughs, A Bike Ride, The Valley  | Thursday Afternoon Monday Morning Podcast 12-4-25

hey what's going on it's bill burr it's time for the thursday afternoon just
before friday
monday morning podcast and i'm just checking in on you whoa what's going on how
are ya
oh how is it going in your world it's fucking december
you're getting out there you're shopping you're doing it online
you're scrolling you're picking out you're trying to figure out the european to
american conversion
side size is that what it is why the do we do everything different i don't know
it doesn't
make any sense to me man like why don't you just stop trying to be different
i remember when i was a kid they tried to they tried to get us into the metric
system they were
going to do this thing where like we finally just joined the rest of the world
you know a meter is a little more than a yard and i remember this whole thing
that they were going to
try and get us to just for once get stop thinking about ourselves
and and just get on board with the rest of the world and america universally
was like well what are we
going to do next start liking soccer and we did how do you do that there would
be like a generation like
a measurement generation gap
you'd ask your kid how much they were and you wouldn't know what they were
talking about you
wouldn't know how tall they were you didn't know how far away they were
these are like major things you can't undo these things unless unless the whole
thing collapses
and then we install a dictator and then like if literally if your life is on
the line
i think then you can make changes like all right i'll go from
whatever what is our system called
um to the metric system
you know and i'll start liking your sports and i'll sing the song about you
you know i have noticed about countries i've gone to where there's dictators is
they have their picture
up everywhere they're sort of like the instagram like influencers of their
country and what's weird
is they never look happy they look very stern like the vibe when you're in a
country that's ruled by one
person the vibe is dad's home that's the vibe dad's home dad's not going to
like what you're doing
dad's coming up the fucking driveway
and you will all act accordingly and then the dad knows he's being a douche
and that eventually his family is going to get fed up with it and they're gonna
tell him to hit the bricks
in one one form or another you know so i guess we didn't want to do that
over here so we just stayed with uh the fuck is that i can't remember what our
system is called
i do know the other day i had to get a screw what do you got a screw loose dude
i had to get a
screw something fell off my garage little decorative plate piece that they have
you know that little
arrow thing that they have on the side of garage doors i don't know why i
opened the garage door
and it just it just it just fell off you know like it just it just couldn't do
it anymore
it just fell in the driveway and i could only find two of the four screws that
i needed so
i went down to the hardware store
hang on a second honey i'm going to the fucking hardware store so i go down
there
and i can't tell if this thing is metric standard for all you fucking people
out there that have been
yelling i couldn't tell if it was metric or standard so i had to go through
them all until i figured out
what it was i still don't remember and um then i got some light bulbs and
shit and i found out that there's certain light bulbs that they have an app on
them
which means there's some is this a smart light is the light listening to the
conversation so it can
like you know it's waiting for me to talk about the lights like wow it seems
bright in here and they're
like oh oh oh that's our cue and then everything else you said is recorded and
sent to the mother
computer to figure out how to sell you more shit is that what's going on i want
to ask you a
fucking question how do we keep allowing these infringements on our privacy
while my people
whitey we keep buying clothes that say like freedom freedom ain't free and all
of this but we're doing
nothing to stop these corporations these guys they're they are the big bad wolf
and they keep telling
you that it's everybody else we keep believing them hey abusive person who's
the one abusing me oh those
people over there thank you and then there we go off we go to go fucking fight
some other people
when it's really fucking you but do be deep sorry um all billy freckles billy
freckles is having
breakthroughs in uh in therapy man i am finally getting rid of all of this
anger like after all
of these years of doing like surface work i'm actually finally getting to the
core of it and uh
i really figured out that you you know i guess they say you carry memories in
your chest you carry
anger resentment hurt and pain i do anyway in my gut and i feel like it all is
be
getting untwisted and um
i have tried everything to get rid of this
this fucking temper of mine and i think i finally i finally found the thing and
it's you know is what
people always told me and i just didn't listen you got to cry it out of you and
that's like an emotion
that is denied to men it's denied to women too in general it's just considered
like
you just you're not allowed to do it you got to go do it in private go close
the door it's something
to be shameful of it's really bad because i am finding that like i found like
anger you can't
fucking move forward you're just stuck in this place but if you cry it's
literally that is like the mushrooms
of emotions and you feel better afterward and you don't want to abuse yourself
you don't want to
fucking do drugs or drink or um eat something bad or just punish yourself
anymore you stop hating yourself
you stop seeing yourself as the way the people abusing you did and made you
feel and you can kind of
come out of all of that um it's really cool and i actually got to that place
through my last
acting gig because all these weird emotions were coming out that had nothing to
do with the scene
that i was doing when i was rehearsing it and i kind of figured out that when i
act
i open the door up to all these emotions that i don't allow myself to feel so
then a lot of misdirected
shit comes out um so this time after my acting gig i was like you know what i'm
gonna leave
that door open and see what happens and it was a fucking game changer to say
the least um just the
fact that i could even tell you guys this um without getting emotional
yeah like i wouldn't i wouldn't have been able to do that like two three weeks
ago
it's
fucking crazy
fucking crazy how long it took me to just do that and as always it's just
you think it's a mountain and you're just stepping up
onto like a curb i would say i don't know anyway let's talk football
um so my patriots kick the out of the giants and then a friend of mine text me
saying wow the patriots
are for real and i'm like okay well not for nothing you guys have an interim
coach and you have a really
young quarterback who hasn't learned to get rid of the ball you know so he's
taking a lot of hits
he doesn't need to be taking and um i don't know we'll see but i'm starting to
believe it i think
we got as good a chance as anybody to go pretty far in the playoffs we we shall
see i mean i don't
i don't know it's such a crazy crazy year i saw like the first um
i saw the first quarter i got to watch the rest of the game but then i went and
i had like this
massage slash fucking breath thing that i did that just fucking blew my mind um
it was like a
fucking acid trip this woman that was doing it she's pushing on my back going
all right this is
your liver this is where you store up all your anger don't be afraid of the
noises you make and
i just fucking went with it and uh dude it was like it was like a psychedelic
trip that i took
i remember i went back to this town i grew up in when i was really young and i
thought i didn't
remember a lot of it because i was so young and it turned i blocked out a lot
of it and i was like
i was taking a car ride through this fucking town and i remembered the names of
friends i had street names
all of this stuff and it was almost like i could feel the wind on my face as i
was driving down the
street in the car it was fucking wild um it was the most like peyote experience
i've ever had and i
wasn't uh i wasn't on any drugs it's really sorry this this podcast is fucking
weird but you know
i've been sitting on this shit for 50 years but so to finally have it out of me
or starting to come out
or having uh a way out you know i remember watching this thing this guy was
telling um
this story about deep sea cave diving and how easily you can get fucking lost
and watching it now i i kind of feel like this is almost like trauma like if
you get lost like trying
to find a fucking way out it takes you your whole goddamn life it's nuts sorry
dude i know i'm supposed
to be fucking making you laugh here jesus christ am i gonna bomb tomorrow night
was it yeah tomorrow
night in bakersfield i'm not but my act right now is really weird my act like
three quarters of it is
the guy before these experiences and then the last quarter of it is shit i've
written since then so
it's gonna be a little physical graffiti it's kind of kind of be like a double
album
or you like remember when the black crows would do like an electric and then an
acoustic set it's
it's kind of it's gonna be uh it's gonna be weird so anyway uh still been doing
the drum thing
trying to uh you know just doing that exercise to free myself up which has been
amazing and somebody
sent me a video today of somebody like counting off a song and playing it jamming
with these guys
thinking that he knew it and he got like halfway through the first verse and
realized oh this is
a different song i don't know i don't know this song so he was just looking at
his bass player
and he was giving him where like the hits were and uh and he sort of just he's
he was like writing
notes on the screen saying like i have no idea what i'm doing here but he was
such a fucking accomplished
drummer that it still sounded great but then the coolest thing he said i start
i'm smiling here on
purpose because i've learned to like smile during these difficult things kind
of freeze up your brain
or whatever so you don't make um you know you don't get between your ears like
i don't know what i'm
doing i can't do this it's just like well it's in four i'm playing four so
snare two four i'm gonna
keep doing this and when he nods i'm hitting a fucking symbol and the kid
fucking wrote it out
um was such a fucking cool video i was smiling ear to ear watching it because
uh
as a comedian i know that feeling as far as like you start to go into a joke
and halfway
through it you're like i don't even remember where this joke goes and then you
just stop thinking
it's something it just kind of comes out of your mouth and it works and you
kind of like but if you
don't think if you don't think if you don't give into like that fucking panic
um i don't know
i don't know it's a weird thing but uh i know this is a little fucking hippy dippy
but um i'm really
happy that i finally i finally fucking got there so any of you other angry
people out there who've
been listening to me and you liked me because i was angry and you could relate
just know
you know there is a fucking way out it takes forever you know or i shouldn't
say that it took
me for fucking ever but uh i got a fun afternoon coming up i'm gonna go ride
some motorcycles with
uh my buddy dean del rey and the uh people at indian motorcycles were nice
enough to loan us this
beautiful fucking bike oh my god is it gorgeous it's the uh indian scout rt
sort of a sleeker bagger
um as opposed to their big what that chieftain i think is their big bike so we're
gonna take a
ride through the canyons today and that's another great thing for your mental
health i find anyways like
when i'm riding a motorcycle like i'm not thinking anything about riding the
motorcycle and not wiping
out hence um i'm really like present and fuckin