Name: Stavvy's World #45 - Sal Vulcano | Full Episode
Uploaded: 2023-10-09T16:10:52.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Stavvy's World #45 - Sal Vulcano | Full Episode' from Stavvy's World on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-10-09. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Stavvy's World #45 - Sal Vulcano | Full Episode' from Stavvy's World on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-10-09. Transcript available.

Stavvy's World #45 - Sal Vulcano | Full Episode

Opa! Welcome everybody to Stavi's World 904-800-STAV. Call in and we'll solve
all your problems.
We got my boy in the studio, Sal Volcano. Thanks for coming, Sal.
I love you, baby.
How's it going, dude?
Take me a minute. I've been trying to get on for a while, so I finally got on.
We're like, sorry, Sal, we gotta smoke weed and do news stories about walruses
fucking each other in the ass.
We do do a once a month Cush Brothers episode, so if you ever want to come back
and get high and read the news.
Are you insane? Can we do that today? What do you mean? I don't even want to do
this one.
Sorry, I have stuff to do. We can't do Cush Brothers right now. I have to do
stuff after this podcast, but we will absolutely keep you in mind.
I did Cush Brothers all day.
No, yeah, the schedule's fine. This is Queens, bro.
I know, yeah.
This is Queens. I love it.
This is authentic Queens, man.
Yes, yes. It is funny. I do like, I mean, you make people go to Staten Island
to do your podcast.
Well, not anymore, but now I'm downtown.
Downtown.
Wow, nice, dude.
Downtown.
Wow, that's big.
You know who that is?
No.
It's an old song.
Okay.
I know the song. I didn't know if Petula sang it.
It's before my time, but I still kind of know.
I do know the song. I was not familiar with Petula.
Yeah, you came to Staten for me.
I did.
Yeah.
Yeah, you and Chris. That was a good time.
Yeah, that was fun.
Yeah, yeah.
Oh, downtown. I'll come downtown.
Wow, you're moving on.
How does it feel like you're a trader finally?
Because you hung on to Staten Island so hysterically long.
It's like a place to do business out of. Not just live there and commute. It's
one thing to subject yourself to living to Staten Island, but you made everyone.
I was happy to go, but everyone. I mean, I make people come to Queens, but.
It was like we started during the pandemic.
Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha.
And so we weren't going to go nowhere really. So we weren't really having
guests at first either.
Yeah, yeah.
So I was like, look, and I was doing two and we started with the exact same
time, Taste Buds and Hey Babe.
Yes, yes, yes.
So I was like, guys, if you can come to my house, I'll gladly film here.
Right.
But it's going to be hard for me to be running out because my schedule is crazy.
It was at the time crazier than theirs.
Yeah.
So we started there, but then after like a couple, a year and a half, two years,
it was like, we need a space. And I just, it's just my office.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It was already my office.
Oh, okay, sick.
So I just converted it to that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Because you really are Staten Island's favorite son. You know what I mean? It's
like.
Yeah, there's a few of us now. It's debatable, but I'll take it.
Well, you know, I sure Pete Davidson, of course, but come on.
You came through, you clung through, you came through True TV with bloody knuckles.
Yeah, man.
You know what I mean? Making your friends do quasi-racist stuff in a grocery
store while you laughed.
You know what I mean?
What's this quasi-bullshit?
You earned it.
We don't do quasi.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'm very surprised. I feel like it's season 10 is in the middle of airing now.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's been on like December 13, 2011 was the first show. So it's going on 12
years.
It's crazy.
And it's like, yeah, I'm surprised people aren't like, well, what about this
one, season two?
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, it would be so funny to, the Impractical Jokers are
problematic.
Now it's like, what are we doing, guys? It's a prank show. They're having a
good time.
But it might swing back around. Not this one. If there's like a swing and then
we go really crazy.
Maybe in like 20 years, Gen Z's kids might uncover Impractical Jokers.
My syndication is going to be demolished.
Yeah, it's over, dude. It's over. Why is Murr in Kabuki makeup?
They have the deleted scenes.
The loser has to work in a happy ending parlor. You guys just watching him give
sexual favors against his will.
Do you want to be a writer on the show?
Yeah, I'm actually trying to. That's what this is about. The cameras aren't on.
I just need to get out of podcasting and into writing.
Yeah, we don't really try to curb anything in the moment, but in the edit, we're
like, yay.
Do you ever think there, what about the like, because you've had, I like that
you guys have started doing the, you know, you'll have like guests on where it's
like, like Eric Andre's fun.
Like you just have like prank, people that are good at pranks.
I think you guys, there's got to be like the gritty Impractical Jokers reboot
where you guys go like full like times jackass.
It's like you times jackass and it's like you guys got to start drinking horse
cum.
Things got to start going in your asses.
I mean, for sweeps, for sweeps week.
For sweeps week.
I'm always going for sweeps week. I'll do it. You know, sweeps.
Yeah.
We're sex trafficked. Loser has to get sex trafficked.
All right, series for now.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's it. That's the end.
Tune in for a very special, in fact.
Yeah, that's what, because that is, because, buddy, that's what I'm saying
about Staten Island, because you, you stayed and, you know,
you're just like, you know, you're, you got the nice house, the nice place, you
know, the nice apartment.
You're, you just, you legit like it. You love it.
Well, the thing is, is like, so I, so I went to college locally. I didn't go
away.
And so then I started working in the workforce downtown in Manhattan when I
first started.
You know, out of college, I have a degree in finance.
Oh, really? Hilarious.
Yeah, and then I started working, like, at Prudential Securities in, like, the
mutual fund trading systems.
Oh, wow.
I was a business system analyst.
I didn't want to do that.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Here's how I got that job.
Yeah.
I didn't know what to do in college.
And so when they arrived and they make you pick a major, I was like, I don't
know what to do.
Literally, I don't know what to do. I want to make money. Finance means that.
It means money.
So I took finance.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
No interest, didn't know anything about it.
Of course.
Took it.
Somehow graduated with it. Then I didn't know where to apply for finance.
What school did you go to?
St. John's.
St. John's.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So we got Queens and Stanisla.
Love it, love it.
Stanisla, yeah.
So then my best friend's dad worked at Prudential Securities for, like, 30
years.
So I went on one interview, and they hired me in the back, though, like,
operations, which is, like, an entry-level job.
Yeah.
And it had nothing to do with the finance degree.
I see.
And I worked there for, like, a year, and then there was another, there was
another.
Did they ever, were you, like, they ever haze you?
Did you ever get, did they have to put a gimp suit on or do anything?
For what?
You know, finance, Wolf of Wall Street stuff.
Oh, you know, like, I'm not making the connections.
I did walk around jerking off.
No, it was so not that.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
It was, like, literally this.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
It was, like, everyone got hired right away in the back office.
Right, right, right.
Like, it was actually crazy.
Yeah.
Like, it was, like, not professional.
Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha.
As a matter of fact, I think back on it right now, if it was in this day and
age, that whole place would be wiped out.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Not me, but, like, I, what?
Of course.
But, and then, like, there was another.
We had a huge floor, and there was another department on the floor that was a
business systems analyst, and they basically helped build the trading systems,
and they worked with the brokers.
So they're the middleman, boring as fuck, and I don't know anything about it.
I just don't know how to explain it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
There's the programmers, and then there's the brokers, and then they don't talk
the same language.
Okay.
So I had to have knowledge of both, and I was the middleman.
So I would take what they want, tell the programmers, and we'd build it out,
and put it.
Yeah.
And when I say that as well, it sounds like more than I did.
Sure, sure, sure.
I kind of tiptoed around.
Of course.
But I kept failing up.
Yeah, nice.
And then they gave me a, I was an assistant vice president.
What?
I was there, dude, I was there four years.
I was not even there.
Maybe they were grooming you to be a fall guy.
I don't know what they do.
They hacked in your emails.
You, you have enough experience to be a vice president.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Just sign here.
You, the guy who literally in the cafeteria to save money, would take a Dixie
cup, and instead of filling it with Diet Coke, I'd take the chicken finger tray,
dump it in there, throw out the tray, cap it, put a straw in, and then pay $1
for a Diet Coke that was six chicken fingers.
Sweating my balls off, because if I was cold out there, I don't know what
really would happen.
Yeah, that's tough.
Let me say something right now.
They thought I love soda.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's how I love it.
I had all the tricks, right?
Yeah, yeah.
I'd be late, and before I was, before I would go to my desk late, I would,
instead, I would just go into the bathroom, drop all my stuff in a, in a stall,
and then at like, I was supposed to be at like, say, nine or whatever, at like,
9.20, when I got in late, I'd drop all my stuff in the stall, then I'd walk
back into my desk with a paper and just be like, I was just, I was in the
bathroom.
Nice.
And then, like, a little bit late, I'd run back and go, anyway, so they even
promoted me, so.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, I loved fail.
It is very fun to find the bullshit, like, how to just not do shit.
I mean, I was, I was a paralegal for a mortgage company, and this was during
the, like, you know, when they were just taking people's houses, like, it was
right after the crisis.
Yeah.
And the, the, it was like a mortgage law firm, but it was like.
So you got in when it was good?
Yeah.
Like, I mean, it was literally, I was a telemarketer for something called
American Government Mortgage before the crisis that was directly leading to it.
Right.
And then I worked as a paralegal.
These were Steve's.
Literally, no, I worked as a paralegal, and my firm was like, yeah, come work
at this law firm.
It's pretty chill, whatever.
Yeah.
They were evicting people, and I was like, I can't be a part of it.
Like, morally, I don't want to be a part of this.
Right, right.
So I was just like, I'm just going to stop working, and, you know, maybe I'll
get a couple paychecks out of it.
And they didn't fire me for, like, nine months, dude.
Oh, wow.
It's like, all you have to, in these corporate environments, you just kind of
have to be, like, a fun person.
Yeah, yeah.
Like, people have to like you.
They have to, like, the work does not matter.
Dude.
You can go years with the work not matter.
I was.
It's so awesome.
I was the guy who was a comic, right?
Yeah.
Because I was doing comedy, and, like, I was writing comedy and doing sketch
and stuff, and I had shows, so people would come.
So I was the guy.
Yeah, yeah.
So they were having a hiring bonanza.
That's an official word.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
And the other thing that pulled me away from my entry job, that business system
analysis, they hired, like, 140 people in one summer or something like that.
So I jumped on there, but then I was the comedic relief.
And they would do cool stuff once in a while, like, have, like, you know, a day
that was a potluck or something, whatever it was, for whatever reason.
And they'd play games or have raffles or some stupid shit.
Yeah.
So we would do, like, Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?
Mm-hmm.
And they'd be like, oh, Sal will host it for the whole floor.
Right, right, right.
Nice.
And then I remember one time we did the one where he's supposed to be mean to
people.
Oh.
The Weakest Link.
Yes, The Weakest Link.
That British bitch.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
She'd be like, oh.
I wonder how many people developed, like, sub fantasies as a result of that
lady.
Yeah, there pr