Name: Stavvy's World #126 - Yannis Pappas and Chris Distefano | Full Episode
Uploaded: 2025-04-28T10:01:20.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Stavvy's World #126 - Yannis Pappas and Chris Distefano | Full Episode' from Stavvy's World on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-04-28. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Stavvy's World #126 - Yannis Pappas and Chris Distefano | Full Episode' from Stavvy's World on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-04-28. Transcript available.

Stavvy's World #126 - Yannis Pappas and Chris Distefano | Full Episode

Opa! Welcome everybody to Stavi's World. 904-800-STOV. Call in. We'll solve all
your problems.
Wow, what a beautiful couch today. Two of our favorites united on the couch,
reunited again.
The history hyenas themselves. No, put that down.
Sorry, I was doing an email. No, stop. Blur these out, Eldes.
Sorry. Dude, I could tell, you know what?
I love everybody. I love you all.
I feel good about being here. I was excited to come, and I could tell Eldes was
excited that we were coming,
because he's dressed like Elizabeth Holmes from Theranos.
Eldes is an all-black and a turtleneck. You guys don't even see the pants.
He's looking Parisian today.
I mean, he literally looks like that fucking female CEO who got arrested.
I thought he was coming here to do yoga.
He looks like a very granola-yoga-y guy.
I was just feeling it when I dressed up for a couple classy guys on the couch
today.
But I like that it's still Baltimore, because it's really nice, but the whole
outfit was bought at Old Navy.
Yes, you did look like an Albanian poet.
It was originally very popular. You do.
By the way, have you ever figured out why the Greeks do the snake noise?
Yeah, I didn't know what that was.
I don't know.
As a way to express strong disapproval.
Oh, I see, I see.
Well, it goes back to the thing, and I think we talked about this last time,
and I put it in my last special,
but it's like, Greeks are Arabs, that's why.
Yeah.
Right.
That's like a real, like...
Like, they'll even say, like...
Like, I've heard Greek people say...
Which just sounds Arabic.
I don't know what it means.
I think it's a Greek...
And it's like, to show displeasure, it's like...
Which feels very, like, desert person.
Yeah.
Very Arab.
And I've said that, like, we truly...
The best parts of Greek culture, like, all the food is just like, we put our
little spin on a bunch of Arabic shit.
Right, right.
Right.
You know, Yido, Kebabs.
Turkish coffee, but it's Greek coffee.
Well, Greek coffee.
Let's not get crazy.
Let's not get crazy.
Let's not get crazy.
You know what I mean?
That's the moral enemy, it's the Turks, right?
Yeah.
Absolutely.
What about the Albanians?
Are they okay?
No, they're more the criminal class of our country.
Are they like, you're migrants?
Yeah, exactly.
Literally, yes.
They're kind of, yeah.
Although now it's been so long that I do feel like Albanians are sort of at the...
In the Greek caste system of undesirable Eastern Europeans, Albanians, I feel
like now you've kind of have...
You've kind of clawed to the near the top, I would say.
It's taken thousands of years, but we're passing you on the escalator.
You're not passing us.
Let's not get fucking insane here.
You just got debit cards last year.
You're not passing us, motherfucker.
I remember...
That turtleneck's got you fucking acting arrogant.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's basically, you know, like when a black guy goes and buys a Lexus?
That's fucking...
An Albanian and a turtleneck.
That's noodle money right there.
Which, by the way, shirt, no shirt, same amount of coverage on his neck.
Right.
Whether it's a turtleneck or not.
Dude, Albanians are sneaking in everywhere now.
My family went out to this new restaurant in our neighborhood the other day.
And we thought it was like, you know, it's Italian food, right?
Italian place.
And we're really enjoying the food.
Like everyone's eating.
Yeah.
And then my mom, the owner came over and was nice.
Oh, welcome to my new place, whatever.
And my mom was like, what part of Italy are you from?
And we're all eating.
And he was like, oh, I'm actually Albanian.
The whole table.
It's like I saw...
They got up and left.
One of my cousins just stopped cutting his meat.
And kind of, everyone kind of just looked at it.
And we were like, check please.
We were like, you...
But the food was excellent.
Yeah.
Well, Albanians, that's the thing that they...
They're between Greece and Italy.
Got it.
So it's like, Albanians basically choose, are you going to be...
It's the way like...
It's the way Jersey, are you Philly or New York suburb?
Oh, okay.
Albania, it's like, are you a Greek Albanian or an Italian Albanian, basically?
Right.
Got it.
Okay.
You guys are just like that little chunk of the Jersey Shore, like right in the
middle.
Yeah.
Where you walk and the Philly hats start to turn to giants hats.
Yeah.
Albania, wow.
Yeah.
I'm right about that, right, Elders?
Is there...
What else borders it?
The ocean, obviously.
Is Turkey on the border?
I feel like there's no one left.
No, Turkey's on the other way, you fucking dog.
Oh, whatever.
Turkey's a cross.
I think there's a lot of...
I think there's a lot of admiration for the Italian mob.
What they've done with the mafias over the years.
Right.
That's true.
I feel meathead aspiration to that.
Sure.
That makes sense.
And probably like more...
But that's like more one-sided, because I feel like Italy just doesn't give
that much
of a fuck about them.
Mm-hmm.
There's more like discourse both ways, where like...
Right.
Albanians like...
Yeah.
...dislike and like each other a little more.
Yes, absolutely.
Yeah.
And there's a lot of Albanians that are Muslim, right?
There's a big Muslim population there.
That's technically the majority religion.
Most...
Whoa.
Yeah.
But not you.
Well, it's in his blood, though.
It is.
I haven't seen...
Communism stamped it out, but Elders is half...
You do kind of have like...
Albinomuz.
He does away like with that beard.
You do have a little bit of hijack face.
I've been seeing a lot of those Family Guy Muslim videos on Instagram, so...
Yeah.
He really watches them.
I think...
I'm ripe for conversion, for real.
Yeah.
No, Elders, I could totally see you going muzz...
Yeah.
...at the end of your life, for real.
One more of these Trump executive orders gets through, you're converting them.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Al-Akbar, you're going wild.
Yeah.
That would be fucking awesome.
I could see Elders pulling some weird shit like...
Like, Elders, stop talking about...
Like, he would talk about going into the army up until like six months ago.
Yeah.
He kept being like, "I just think the discipline would be good for me."
It's like...
I've always regretted that I never enlisted.
He couldn't play middle school basketball.
He's been this hype.
Yeah, I love that.
Since we were 11.
I love that.
And he thinks he could do the army.
Yeah.
I love that Elders is like, "I'm going to go into the army."
But then he comes in dressed like Jane Lynch.
Oh, fuck, dude.
You look like a disgraced Greek Orthodox priest.
That is true.
Yeah, that he just took the collar off.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Well...
There's an article about you.
Let's relax.
The Catholics are the...
Right.
We are.
Our priests get to fuck women.
That's true.
That's how you know...
Thank you.
First of all, how can you respect a man who doesn't get pussy?
I'm going to tell this guy my fucking secrets.
This guy doesn't fuck.
Yeah.
And I'm going to seek counsel from him.
Yeah.
He's 58 years old and just like maybe fingered a girl once in high school?
That's...
And he's telling me what to do about my marriage?
No.
A Greek Orthodox priest...
Right.
He is confined...
He has to...
He can't fuck around.
Yeah.
Like he chose his wife.
I listened to him.
He's fucked.
It's also funny to think about your priest just like laying it down.
Right.
Like our priests have kids.
Yeah.
It's fucking hilarious.
Yeah.
Oh, I didn't realize that.
So Greek Orthodox has full...
Yeah.
Right.
So the thing is, the priest, we can't have priests, Catholic priests can't have
wives.
You know, I have to start...
Sorry.
I'm going on tour.
I have to start writing down bits that I think have legs.
And I think, you know, how am I going to respect a priest that doesn't get
pussy?
I like that.
Yeah, yeah.
I like that.
Yeah.
That's a good one.
Well, it's also like a nice, strong hit.
Actually, I'll just start making notes of this.
I'm not...
I have my guests here.
Yeah.
Get to work.
Get to work.
Get to work.
Kaffir boy.
Yes, sir.
Mr. Halkeyz.
House...
Albanian house servant.
Get to work.
It's also a nice, strong hint that the priest is, you know, doesn't have any
boys.
That's when there's a woman there.
We do not have a boy cult.
It's not a problem.
Yeah, there's not...
If anything, I think our priests have a little more of the like, is he going to
fuck a grown
woman, like a little bit more of the like, because we had, I remember what they'll
do sometimes
for priests.
And I don't know where you went to, what your, what your church was like, Yanni,
but when
we were growing up, they would sometimes at, you know, we had, I went to St.
Nicholas in
Baltimore and we had a priest that he wanted to move out to the suburbs,
whatever.
And so they were kind of sending us like priests straight from Greece to kind
of like train
in America.
And they would like, whatever.
Hello everybody!
Yeah, literally, like literally to work on their English.
Oh, Rebels!
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
This weekend Rebels!
Rebels!
And so we, dude, we had a guy who was like, sexy.
Like they came through, he was looking like...
Like swarthy looking, slick black hair.
Like, like, like, like sexy Rasputin.
Yo, nice!
Cause like, you know, Rasputin kind of like didn't bathe, but he still got wild
pussy or
whatever.
And he still like, you couldn't kill Rasputin for whatever reason.
Right.
This guy looked like hot Rasputin.
And I'm telling you, bro, the like Goya, Greek Orthodox youth of America, the Goya
moms
were on this guy's dick.
Yeah.
This guy could have, if you, and I'm not convinced he didn't fuck one of them.
Oh, he probably did.
But he could have legally fucked them all, right?
No, no, no.
He's got a wife.
Oh, you have to have a wife to be a Greek priest?
See, the thing is you choose, they give you a choice.
If you want to be like a bishop, if you want to go far, it's basically like you're
married
to the game.
No pussy for you if you want to be like the Pope.
Got it.
But if you want to be a priest, you can get married and then you get, I mean,
you still
have to, you're still a dork in that you can't get side pussy, right?
But could you be single going in to be a priest and then just fuck them?
And date, you could date, but you couldn't have sex before marriage.
I don't think.
Oh, okay.
I don't know.
There's still a Greek man, so who knows?
The bishops and the archbishops can't be married.
Right.
I think that's how it goes.
But the priests can be.
The priests can be.
But they could also be single as priests and start dating parishioners.
I wonder.
I wonder.
I don't think you can.
No.
No.
It's not the kind of thing where the priest is a fucking Chili's with some
fucking divorced
bitch and like he fucks her three times and they break up and they go mutually
go their
separate ways.
No.
You have to get married and fuck your wife.
Yeah.
Like you still have to follow the Bible to a letter.
Dude, these rules are so gay.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's so funny.
The idea that like the priest would be like.
Yeah.
Just kind of in an open, like casual relationship with like parishioners.
I would fucking, I mean, I think that's the way it needs to go.
I mean, I can tell you from the Catholic side, there's nobody wants to become a
priest anymore.
Yeah.
I mean, nobody.
Makes sense.
It's just, and the numbers are so low.
Yeah.
Like we are selling absolutely no tickets.
Well, the heat came down.
The heat came down.
It's like the heat came down.
It took a while.
The way the mob got kind of, you know, just dismembered.
The Rico.
Yeah.
The Rico.
They just.
Yeah.
Prosecuting was like prosecuting Rico places.
Yeah.
But I literally, my school, St. Matthias that I went to, my church, they have
an Instagram
account or they had an Instagram account and they put out a clip of the priest
giving a
homily.
I'm like, they're starting to do crowd work clips.
They're like, that's what they're trying to do.
It was like a priest giving like a good sermon.
I was like, this is how bad it's gotten now.
You go to St. Matthias.
You go to St. Matthias is follows and it's like, you