Name: Ep 444 - The Draven (feat. Danny McBride)
Uploaded: 2023-05-21T19:08:56.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Ep 444 - The Draven (feat. Danny McBride)' from Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-05-21. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Ep 444 - The Draven (feat. Danny McBride)' from Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-05-21. Transcript available.

Ep 444 - The Draven (feat. Danny McBride)

the wild wild west hello what's up dude not too much so i just look at you guys
or do i look at
this inexpensive camera y'all have lined up just you guys we have three of them
we have three of
them by the way no big deal we do it yeah see the three on it that is i'm kind
of wondering why the
first two aren't set up i mean is it we don't we don't need the coverage we don't
need it we're
we're low we're low prod low prod quality well we're here with danny mcbride
dude
yeah thank you yeah we made it thank you let's drink sparkling water together
yes why don't we drink
alcohol i would like alcohol we have some downstairs i don't think it will well
yeah thanks for doing
this we were we were nervous i mean i was definitely what were you nervous
about what did you think was
going to happen well normally we have like comedians on that we're friends with
so this is a little more
we're not the best interviewers i don't think they're not masters usually the
podcast is us
just talking about like what we whack off to that's fine that's the kind of
interviews i'm kind of tuned
to be able to excel in that's going to work out okay yeah we figured yeah uh
yeah dude we're excited
about this because we both saw eastbound and just acted like you for about a
decade that's perfect how
old are you guys when you saw like 10. no no no i was like 30. yeah yeah i was
a loser at home i was
at home i was like yeah i'm pretty much kenny power dude i'm just at home being
a loser but i'm still
the man we were in college right yeah yeah i was in college pretty much yeah so
that was kind of the
ripe age for it i mean that's who we were making it 23 yeah it was i mean it
was a revelation i saw
that i went i didn't know this is so funny yeah yeah my dad watching my dad was
like that's good
yeah the dad's a good entertainment this is exactly what i want you and your
college friends watching
finally something you brought me something good son
yeah i told my dad to watch alpha dogs i thought he'd like it alpha dogs the
beginning scenes uh
fucking mmf it's an mmf threesome i forgot that was in it i'm so jaded to just
like porn i was like
yeah check out alpha dogs you guys will like it my mom and dad watch it she's
like dude there's an
mmf threesome in the very beginning i was like dude it's also like cool it's
also like super cool white
dudes acting like cholos my dad would hate nothing more white dudes with
tattoos you'd be like what the
fuck is this show i haven't seen alpha dogs what is alpha dogs uh justin timberlake
plays a cholo oh
the movie yeah i was thinking like it was just some like netflix show i haven't
heard of it's in its
sixth season no this is years ago yeah it's the movie yeah alpha dogs of course
dude alpha dogs ruled but
my dad would not like the beginning was tough that was a beginning that's a
tough pitch in the beginning
yeah who's having mmf threesome it's two dudes and a girl two out but that's
clearly one of them had
to die yeah it's two alphas can't share a woman like that of course i i took my
mom and my sister
to go see the wolf of wall street on christmas day when it came out and it's
like an opening it's
like dude cook out the asshole then i'm sitting there just thinking like i
brought my mom to this
and then i hear my mom like lean over to my sister and she says leonardo capra
is so good looking and
i'm like that's what she took out of the scene like she wasn't like she's in we
could watch all three
hours of this this is going to be great yeah my brother told my parents to
watch before the devil
knows you're dead and that's all about like killing your parents that was
terrible there's nothing
worse dude i'll still watch a movie with my parents if there's a sex scene i
leave the room well me or
my dad will leave the room so i'm gonna be like i take a knee i take a knee the
whole time yeah but
then whoever's left if my dad leaves and i'm just stuck with my mom that's no
good or if i leave if
i leave then my parents are just watching porn together that's the scenario i
gotta leave with
my dad then it looks like we're both jerking off i don't even i don't say
anything i just lay on the
floor i just get up and lay on the floor can we order pizza
well dude your headquarters is pretty tight this is this is the this is where
it all happens dude this
is all the magic right here at this table really every bit of it sure yeah that's
where you pitch
everything people play magic the gathering around this fucking thing you know
it's perfect yeah did
you ever play magic together i didn't i think i think it hit like right as i
was too old to be
doing yeah like that i was like young and i saw the kids that played it they
were all dorks yeah but
i always loved looking at the cards i always thought i got how to play it i
just liked collecting
when i was a kid so i was like there's all these things you can collect and now
do stuff with it yeah
yeah i pokemon all of my son's like massively into pokemon yeah but i don't
think he even plays it
i think they just like collect the cards i don't think he even knows how to
play it i've tried to
ask him like what do you do with these things like i thought it was like a
blood sport where like you
compete against each other and like if you beat someone keep it yeah yeah yeah
he's like no no we
don't play like that gentleman's game yeah it's like what do y'all do you just
look at the cards
i was too old when pokemon hit and i got into it so did i i quietly got into it
i used my little brother
to get into it like i kind of like it was like a proxy thing yeah i let him
watch and i'd watch with
him like i'll check it out i knew every single one of them it was well there
was 152 i think back then
they said the johto leagues and all that and it was like wait what the original
pokemon are 152.
what's the second thing you named johto then they said the johto leagues now
that's the johto leagues
the johto leagues i used to play i used to watch the game i watched the show
after school in high
school and then i would eat like yeah dude i'm a little i'm a couple years of
senior so i would
watch the i'd watch it with my brother and then i would go play gameboy and
take a and play pokemon
on gameboy it's great i knew all was made for yeah yeah my friend let me borrow
his gameboy color it
was nice dude yeah it's crazy played pokemon had to hide it from my parents
because it's devil if my dad
knew i was playing pokemon he'd be like what the football's coming up dude
so how many pokemon are there right now i have no i think there's like 2 000. i
mean
apparently binders full if you like go by my son's collection
that's the hard-hitting questions we're talking about how many pokemon are mr mcbride
how many
fucking pokemon's even are there well i think there's a shitload of pokemon's
these days
yes yeah we had pogs pogs that was cutthroat yeah you take what you got if you
played pogs
i never did them either but they were once again they were like little slammer
slammer but again
that was like pogs was like i feel like kids just made up whoever was the bully
of the group just made
the rules up like i get that pug yeah they were cardboard circles and you would
just like pay 40 bucks
and then we actually play with my cousin when we would play i would play
someone my cousin would go
behind them and just start gouging their shoe box of pogs and just stealing
them and that was it yeah
we just we play here look nice little thing going yeah yeah do you ever play
any cool games i missed
it all man i mean i like you know when i was a kid it was like the birth of
video games so that was
like you know that's what we were rocking yeah we weren't trying to like do in
front of each other
we're playing deadly wings my friends are hardcore we play super mario brothers
we beat zelda
so what else is going on i knew this i knew this was gonna happen no we got
good questions down here
and shit the bed dude no we didn't dude i i was taking a piss by the way dude
you were not you were
marking your turn crap introduction dude walked out of the bathroom he's like
what are you taking a
shit i was like i actually walked out walked back i saw you i was like i gotta
dry my hands more
it's the worst because like this this is sort of like we have a pretty small
writer's room for the
shows that we're on but this is where we write and that's the bathroom right
there it's so like
anytime anybody goes in there you got to be a silent assassin or else you're
made fun of for the
entire day if there's if that makes one noise coming out everybody in this room
is making that noise
yeah it's tough living with i chris and tommy our bathroom i just played video
i play video games all
day obviously and uh the bathroom was right next to it tommy's he drinks a lot
so his shits and he's an
old man he shits like a loud old man i'd be like yo shut up the fuck yeah
having someone hearing you
shit that was the worst uh night of my life when we came back from that show it
was like two in the
morning i just took a shit in his apartment it was him and his girlfriend it
was like like she was
trying to get in the bathroom so i was in there shitting i felt so bad that
like for your girlfriend
that like they're just an old man shitting in the morning and like it took me a
while i i've made
i've passed the point now where it's like i'm going to finish every one i take
i'm not getting up early
she came like sat there for like 35 minutes she came in the bedroom and was
like i think someone's in
the bathroom i was like i could hear yes what are you doing in there i could
hear i could hear you
guys talking you just think dude he's like he's got like diet stuff oh yeah
stuff that makes your
shit smell bad yeah i have all kinds of weird food things so i have yeah i can't
eat gluten stuff so i
think like gluten is what makes people's shit smell delicious right that's what
that is
yeah i take like meso-american dumps i dump like a babylonian dude it's a
fucking so gross
that's why they built pyramids i mean like teflower and just store all that
fucking indian dump dude so let's get down to brass tacks let's do it we've
covered pokemon
we've covered shits what else we got today that's about it as far as we get do
you like movies
i watched the interview i watched the um whatchamacallit mark maron interview
and what i
what i came prepared with is i so you did was that a joke that you wrote the
draven no no that's a real
thing that's a real thing we get into the draven let's make it right now what
what's the draven what's
the draven about half man half half right he was uh half man half dragon yeah
exactly why why is it
and he would hunt dragons and that's the deal and it wasn't comedic it was like
a hardcore
fantasy action movie that's what made me laugh so hard which top what half like
was he dragon head
man's body no no he looked just like he looked like a good looking dude with
just like kind of
translucent skin and muscles they just got glossed over i was like that was the
funniest thing i've
ever heard what is it really why is it draven that's what that's the me and i
got the guy who
wrote it uh ben best who's no longer with us we uh yeah it was right we first
moved out to los
angeles we were just trying to like write as much stuff as we could and we had
no sense of what our
voice was going to be or what we were going to try to get into and again there
was a few nights where
we worked pretty hardcore on a fantasy movie called the draven but you know
what the script was
good dude i'm telling you it sounds sick dude i don't want to spoil it but what
happens to the
draven dude well you know what it has a pretty dark ending which is what i
liked about it which is that
this is so ridiculous to get into this i'm gonna pitch the whole thing please
yeah
it starts where there's like this kingdom and this dragon rolls in while they're
having some celebration
kills all these people and then leaves the prince for dead oh the prince starts
to transform
in