Name: Ep 527 - The Pillow (feat. Stavros Halkias, Steve Gerben, & Chris O'Connor)
Uploaded: 2024-11-08T23:40:36.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Ep 527 - The Pillow (feat. Stavros Halkias, Steve Gerben, & Chris O'Connor)' from Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-11-08. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Ep 527 - The Pillow (feat. Stavros Halkias, Steve Gerben, & Chris O'Connor)' from Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-11-08. Transcript available.

Ep 527 - The Pillow (feat. Stavros Halkias, Steve Gerben, & Chris O'Connor)

the wild wild west
hello ma'am it's good to be here guys we're here live with stavros stevie gerby
baby oh
chris the ocon man oh man god damn what's going on in the world these days what
a crew
you know i think i think we can all agree the most important thing is that let's
start a cult
in terms of what the country is going to be talking about and what's buzzing on
everybody
let's start a cult is out a nice dumb comedy on vod folks that's what everybody's
thinking about
and what's the date november 12th i believe i don't actually i think get it on
amazon or some
shit yeah apple you know wherever the you rent the movie yeah and that's what
you want to
think did you have did you have a lot of fun making a movie did you have fun
making a movie
uh yeah i mean i was trying to avoid it but there's no avoiding it yeah right
yep
it's undeniably funny it's really true unfortunately it's really funny
well yeah we all you did give us a day off and force us to go vote in pennsylvania
about four
times each i did uh you gave us the names you told us to pick out gravestones
our four favorite ones
and in cast votes for trump you could have voted for me that's somebody should
have voted for me i
wonder what your numbers were like in in pennsylvania you probably got some
nice write-ins for real
yeah i don't know and they count those as trump by the way as me i didn't vote
oh
i could have given some of my vote i am uh undeniably a trump enjoyer
there's no denying that you know support i'll let the other you know i'll let
the troops handle
that i'll let the patriots take care of that sure you're you got stolen value
you got trump's stolen
valor stolen valor on that someone sees you in a maga hat they're like where
did you serve
where were you in january 6. i'm in line at sbarro's in the mall did you serve
where did you vote for
donald trump i didn't but i thought he was funny as well where's your official
donald trump commemorative
coin where's your official donald trump silver dollar people give me i have a i
have a i definitely
have a donald trump one thousand dollar bill that's gold and it has donald
trump on it uh i've got two
of those two separate people have given me that's awesome value he's got to be
going through i can't
throw them out i can't throw them out all the like old people they're like well
it's something to leave
my family yeah trump thousand dollar gold trump is going to just appreciate
over time like did you
guys remember those those people that were like uh uh they thought buying iraqi
dinar was going to be
like next thing yeah that was like a big fox once democracy sets in yeah that
currency is going to
be worth a lot oh isis i just have a currency this is dead dude i don't know if
you remember t1 got
rid of them oh they're still floating around don't they like uh i don't think
they're even shadow yeah
there's got to be one guy there's like four with a layer still yeah he's
probably hanging around he's
probably got all the currency now he's probably got a pet and a cat and where's
their like stronghold
are they really done i mean they jump around they went to africa for a little
bit didn't they
yeah i mean isn't that just boca haram or whatever yeah that's the yeah isn't
that that's
their isis that's how it always works they always have branches like that it
wasn't isis al-qaeda
and al-qaeda was like you guys are nuts yeah yeah oh damn is that what happened
i believe yeah
that's awesome for i think yeah okay they got trump situation on their hands
they thought they were
crazy and then a new guy came yeah so you want to see crazy we're about to pick
a fight with america
we don't have anything do you do you think there's any isis guys that are into
the joker do you think
there was a guy who came in and joked makeup definitely it was like they still
love movies and
culture yeah true you know what i mean like it wasn't it like what had bin laden
had like
what was his yeah he had a movie he had a favorite dude where's my car in his
collection
it's like kim jong-un being like subtitles yeah yeah was it just a translator
stand next to it
i swear kim jong-un was kevin costner he was like he was like this guy's
incredible
yeah now and they're like we can't get him he's like you're dead wow he
executed the guy
he was a huge chicago bulls fan that was ill oh that was ill yeah he was elvis
right didn't he wasn't
that like a big thing didn't he get to visit graceland once who kim jong-un i
think john hill
hill hill was it was the new his dad no no oh it was the old one yeah who knows
the new one kim jong
hill was no kim jong-un was i swear the new guy liked dennis rodman i think
love of the bulls
go is like a family trait oh okay because the dad was from the emperor the guy's
born from the sun
yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah i love a fattest emperor too man his fits i honestly
want to dress like him
he's and he was ahead of the curve with like the flowy outfits and yeah he's
like wide leg trousers
that's how like gay guys dress now that's like cool you go to even kids all
wear that was
kim jong-un big legs flowy garments dude kim jong-un dress is awesome i think
they're headed over to
ukraine russia yes they're all jacking off and they just got the internet so
they're all jacking off
they lost an entire battalion i mean you saw those trenches i was showing you
could catch a couple in
there yeah you could catch a jack off in ukraine easy no problem and then that
guy peeks around the
corner you go oh having a drone fly over you as you're beating off as you're
beating off the whole
world's gonna see you going your little ass malnourished north korean dick do
they feed the
soldiers well i bet at least no right probably not that great i'm sure they
have like 20 of them that are
jacked yeah and they'd march yeah the king's guard like the official guard he
probably has some sexy
guys out there but yeah having being deployed because they're the troops you
can they're the
troops that he can do without he's not set in russia his number one guys he's
not he's saying the guys
that are gonna get addicted to porn oh maybe it's a pornography purge true
maybe they said maybe they
fucking jettison their horny assault they'd get me yeah oh yeah you'd be
basically a seventh grader
all over again true dude you'd get there and be like holy dude you've been able
to jack off you
can watch it you can see sex i mean remember bank like just jacking off to bang
bust like 30 second
trailers on on like yeah on uh dial-up yeah these guys get on a phone broadband
first time all right
all right russia's got to call me like turn it off turn it off no it's shorting
starlink jacking off for
the first time yeah i saw i saw i've seen starlink twice in the sky and it's
terrifying people get
scared of it what is it's just a little right it's a row of like a ton of
satellites in a straight
line going across the sky and i've heard people like screaming when they saw it
it looks like a ufo
it's like the scariest thing i've ever seen damn you ever see it yeah i i've
seen images of it yeah
it's really it's yeah it's not a regular satellite it's like no it's a ton of
satellites interesting
interesting i saw a homeless guy see spinners for the first time like back in
uh
like the well rims yeah yeah that's awesome and yeah i thought it was very
funny what the
that's got to feel so bad to be homeless and a guy just has like show off rims
just like
two pairs of rims on his car that you would kill to live in to live inside that
lincoln and this
has extra ribs you'd sell that lincoln immediately for some drugs yeah let's
not act like these guys
are just like oh i wish i had a well he'd like to sleep inside jack off and
sleep he would sleep
inside for two days right get warm and then be like i could go for some right
now
sell these spinners right yeah the spinners would go first oh me yeah that's
fair it'd be high as
in the back of that car that's a good night the night you still have the car
and you're getting
off the spinners money and maybe you take the radio out too but you have
shelter to get inside
a couple wendy's i don't think i don't think those guys need shelter to get
pussy i guess
that's what they're they're gonna go find their best girl but it must feel nice
to inside for a
change do you think those boys are getting a lot of pussy i don't know i don't
think they're getting
any ever but that's what i'm saying they're not getting it's on call no no of
course not what i'm
saying actually yeah i guess it is because they're all drug addict ladies yeah
and you want to get
shelter yeah a roof takes a little bit of heroin yeah so i got some heroin
exactly so what i'm saying
i take it back well no i don't think they're that much but i think those boys
are getting sucked constantly
what is your theory what no i'm just saying they don't that much but this guy
with the lincoln
his first night sells the spinners it's the best of both worlds before he has
to sell the car
whole cloth yeah he gets to have it buy pussy for 20 dollars or maybe maybe 40.
maybe it's not
you have to buy it you go i have some heroin oh true she's in the car you go
you're gonna have
to give me head i think that's understood you're not getting any heroin
well i'll kill you get out of my weekend doing all the same stuff you're like
this is gonna last
forever yeah dude from here on out i'm turning things around that's one more
hit
one more blow job and then i'm getting a job dude if you could like bottle and
put that into your
like the happiness that guy feels yeah the first time he does all like a nice
good quality heroin and
get sucked off that guy that feels better than anything we will ever experience
i don't know i feel
like i've experienced versions of that but addiction oh no i mean i guess
giving into your vices i'm
talking about just like the idea of like getting one paycheck and being like i'm
the richest guy
yeah but you're going out i'm getting yes true but you don't have the extreme
deprivation
to like juxtapose it with do you know what i mean going from absolutely nothing
the living on the
street living on the street getting no head whatsoever to you know what i mean
unless you've
done something awesome with your money these guys are making eyes at each other
i'm just smiling at
steven i'm happy to see him and i know he's probably spinning in his head
because he hasn't spoken yet
he gave us the lincoln the rims oh thank you right now i was sitting here and
then i was like if
shane accuses me of not talking i'll be like i'll give you the whole sprint
video steve i got you
brother i was just checking in which was such an awesome thing it's like i
haven't seen starlink but uh
uh yes no i'm so happy to be pod you know we i on the record i've been trying
to get you clear of
your you've got like a you've got like so you're the ussr and he's so bonus and
you won't let him
come over you know it's not him no no no no if he does another podcast before
he does mine now he's
free okay all right all right guys i said that on my own terms yeah you make
your own terms i've been
trying to get steve no i'm saying are you you know what i mean yes yes yes you're
a loyal man that's
true yeah but man i remember seeing seeing steve for the first time maybe it
was the original tires
pilot or maybe it was even that there's probably that right with the king
sketch when did you guys do
that yeah was that first two summers ago right i just remember seeing this and
being
i'm like that's a star baby i was like yeah i love that guy i don't know he
reminds me of tom
cruz that's what it well whatever i'm gonna take that as honest to some degree
i am on no yeah i
am i mean you have star qualities to stop you do okay i'm trying to be nice
dude i can't tell you
have you just said i don't look like tom cruise i obviously didn't look like
yeah but you wear cool
jackets you want like a leather top gun jacket no i don't in your head you're
tom cruise no i don't
want a leather top in my head 