Name: Ep 598 - Night Shadow (feat. Dan Soder, Chris O'Connor, Billy)
Uploaded: 2026-02-12T13:00:14.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Ep 598 - Night Shadow (feat. Dan Soder, Chris O'Connor, Billy)' from Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2026-02-12. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Ep 598 - Night Shadow (feat. Dan Soder, Chris O'Connor, Billy)' from Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2026-02-12. Transcript available.

Ep 598 - Night Shadow (feat. Dan Soder, Chris O'Connor, Billy)

wild wild west ew dude ew what is that ew dude oh that is reggie's from a wild
rat baby
did you spit that onto your phone no no no i i was eating earlier and i i had
it like this
so maybe a little raunch dipped on that is what it is a little patina didn't
hurt anyone
you got some ronch on your phone dude it smells though no it smells like raunch
do you ever split
up that stuff that was like a traitor as a kid no you ever spit up like a ball
just oh like phlegm
or what no it was like i think it was like a thing that my buddy had it real
bad he had to have like
surgery yeah it was like something wrong with his tonsils or something but like
i think there's a
period during your adolescence where you can cough up it's just like a solid
house of tartar
you're talking about it's like a pocket in the back of your throat yeah yeah i
guess it's a tonsil
stone yeah like a gumball machine they smell like a asshole do they really oh
what is it it's just
gunk and your tonsils they like it's little like deposits of i don't know damn
it just like did you
do that is that what's happening it only happened like once but my buddy had it
so bad he had to get
like surgery you smelled it i did smell that yeah when it came up i like oh i
was like did he one
did he one time it
turned it off tag and throw up yeah it's like an alien egg dude it because i
smelled it didn't smell
like anything and i broke it and it was like oh my god you were a curious man i
know i mean dude if
you're not one of those he tried to he did gender alter and he gender altered
he tried to poke his
nipples when they were getting puffy as a boy i know a kid who did that but his
dad had him on hgh and
his mick nipples started lactating and then he put a pin in it and squeezed it
can i tell you as a
puff nipple guy that's crazy forever listen i've been a puffy nipple since i
was a boy but yeah here's
here's what you do at the public pool you do a side tickle get them things down
oh really then you look
great this gets your nipples down you just go like you tickle and you get like
you get like yeah hard
nipples you get your nipples hard before you get it yeah why not i'm not
walking around puffy nipples
puffy nipples always dog whoa not like crazy puff just like a little just like
pill and you never
thought about getting rid of him that what am i the rock you know the rock had
nipple surgery really yeah
when he was like rocky maivia and he came in he had like big puffy nipples and
then you see him a
couple years later and it like looks like yeah you gotta do that yeah if you're
a pro wrestler you can't
have was it was that it's a disaster that's crazy that's like oval pads on your
tits yeah you're just
definitely a heel there's nothing you can do you have to have straps that's
straps if you're pro
wrestler you're in the vader suit sometimes you got to get a surgery because
you're like if you take
steroids you get like gyno and like you get like fluid build up in your nipples
wouldn't know like
i'm natural but you are a lifetime natural matt's juice to the i saw a picture
of him the other day
dude he's like actually like in big looks like jacka willock dude i saw a
picture in the back
make my birthday party good don't want to make me a call on my 40th good
the uh yeah mass juice of the girls we pray for him we pray dude i hope i hope
he just takes over
austin when you're gone i mean you come back and there's gates built he's fully
yeah that's the
awesome lifestyle he's juiced biohacking yeah you got to go down there get get
giant with hot dog nick
yeah that's good stuff well i'm glad you're here dude i want to settle this
austin new york beef
once it's the chaos then i hate it did it it's like it is uh like a old person
with dimension yeah
you know binge clip
the deadliest game yeah uh yeah the lamere thing was like i didn't even know i
got told like bush got
told the towers got hit yeah i sat down for the regs and they whispered into my
ear and i was like
he said the mayor got attacked there got crushed we put his tweet at the end of
our intro this week
did you see it yeah listen no soda yeah oh my god the mayor's got it is my
favorite tweet msnbc brain
i mean i don't know it's it's wonderful msnbc brain is crazy because now that
means
you also have stuck through the shifting through the through the the trans
surgery that the network went
through where it's like that's my dead name my new network name is sn yeah he's
all about that
really i swear to god if it's on the view he agrees he could be the sixth chair
just to let you know
where lamere's brain is my grandmother's greatest defender my great yeah he's
the guardian he's the
guardian of the mantle he's chimera he um my grandmother before she died i want
to say like 93 to 97
would just we should wake up and just blare the view at like 73 volume so it
would be in her that's
what's happening in my house right now i just wake up and hear like joy bayard
being like i'm sorry
he's not okay and you're like look what's grandma's guest bedroom like what the
is that
let me see that's me here i'll tell you alex jones might be the biggest victim
of this epstein
shit because like he tried and then he fell for the hillary and then he kept
falling into epstein
traps joe rogan too yeah fully concise thought it makes i can't even i can't
even decipher what that
means i love i think what do you think it means i think it's one of those
things where you're gonna
look at it backwards and see the pattern he's speaking to us strictly like
listening to led
zeppelin backwards it was dershowitz the whole time yeah it's high level the
only time i talked to the
man now is mad out undercover in his suit just my uh my bear is a character my
ring camera on my ring
camera i see him pick up his grub hub so i get to anytime everything i get to
talk to him and go put
the twitter down bro delete your twitter and he's like okay i will it's so
funny i got some good photos
i'm scratching that geocamera of la mare it is it's like those live cameras of
falcons on skyscraper
you know who he's eating again that's him that's him picking up that's so funny
you should put it on the like fate local facebook group like has anyone seen
this man at the front of
filming a film collecting collecting his pizza please turn him into austin sasquatch
oh no oh
that's so i think a highlight to i love america i call him to wake him up to
order who'll order grub
up and fall asleep yes and i'll just keep checking the ring camera and be like
dude your food's still
outside it's been outside for two hours you know i'm full of sleep yeah i do a
highlight video to i'm a
boss by rick ross picking up all you know grubbo
yeah that's uh that's what he's up to excuse me what why'd you touch my leg bro
companionship okay
nothing more i did that the other night i ordered mcdonald's for the first time
in a long time which
night arch has called your name i think it was friday could have been saturday
was i with you
because you've been putting together some performances really idiot comment
yeah yeah
well i will say the whole crew because we got to work monday through friday so
then friday rolls around
you go oh we're gonna go back out the squad's not used to not being able to
drink during the week
you guys you pulled a dastardly trick on saturday where i you were like what
are you doing and i was
like i'm gonna go across the street and watch the flyers game and you were like
you gave me every
indication you'd show up and then i just started throwing them back i was
sitting alone and i showed
up to the bar like nine nine ten p.m he was already back in bed he went back to
sleep you went to you
rip you i'm sorry oh yeah ripped by himself in a dog bar and then blame you he
was like where were you
i was like i told you i was going i said i started drinking why didn't you why
were you there it would
have been nice i feel like i had something to do i don't think i couldn't have
gotten day drunk
no you were thinking about going the sixers oh yeah they had a little double
header it would have
been nice it would have been nice but you you your pants we can't go we can
know we can't go to
day flyers games yeah we can that was another disaster no that was funny him
deros and beezer
to a flyers game it's a crew it is a rough crew that's crazy that's like a bank
heist crew
is a terrible crew that's a bad that's just all um the bad guy from heat it's
just the whole crew
of lingos bad guys the whole crows wingro you guys are all bad well derosa was
the he was the
the key to the fall he gave it he did you fall no i didn't fall down so i i
swear i was doing shots
he's always suggesting i wasn't doing and do that i wasn't drinking at the game
really i might have had
three beers yeah so then we go to a bar after i'm talking to chris i turn my
head for 15 minutes
i look back he's like asleep i was like what the happened to you he's like derosa
how is he sleeping i look to my right derosa's over just a head head in the
hands
yeah do you do the do you do the heads up seven up sleep on the bar probably do
oh you do little kid
picture yes that's such an adorable he's like a sleeping dog do you like that's
funny you're watching
dude taking a little day siesta from booze at a bar that's crazy well we went
hard we went hard the
night before yeah and then i made it through the i made it through the game and
into the night game you
were great and people were taking performance enhancers yeah yeah i refused i
refused yeah i
refused the performance it was great dude adderall hitting the drinking scene
was like steroids in
baseball in the late 90s you were like were hitting dingers in ways that you
were like it's probably
responsible for like 75 of the duis yeah yeah i'm absolutely fine you find that
data you'll see a spike
you're 100 there mentally like i'll drive right now yeah you're totally fine he's
witnessed he's
witnessed me in my song get out uh my body shuts down and off so i'm like dude
i'm ready to go if you
are like i can't walk we're we gotta stay here one of the most embarrassing drunks
i've ever been was
i did an all-nighter in vegas when i was like in my 20s and my friend and i
were gambling late and i was
so drunk i dropped a chip it was a hundred dollar chip and the and the guy was
like jesus christ and i was
like i can't find it it was just like well he goes like i was looking for it i
just remember him go
like this well i can't help you look for it and i was going it's a hundred
dollar chip and i and i
want i needed to write something down and i couldn't write and i was like this
is i found the chip
leans leans get dangerous at that hour to lean over because your your vector
whatever is much smaller
right off the school and i'm not joking i want to put the time at around 6 30
in the morning in vegas
this that's terrible it's a terrible way to go yeah that's like the all pro
kick well in madam's
you're like this could go good probably not when you're falling into the moment
of acceptance
there is like a little much time dude you go when you're drunk full there's so
much time to be like
no way i'm falling it it kills back in the day artie fuqua would just have
women with them at the
cellar so you'd like finish a show at the cellar and already be like oh you don't
know my home girl
and it'd be like two swiss women that you'd be like hey nice to meet you i was
blackout and arty was like
oh my australian friends and they're like we got into all italian drinking you
want to go and i was
blackout and i was on the patio smoking a cigarette and i came in and didn't
see a table and took a
chop block on my right on my right leg where i dude i still remember how long
that fall was because i was
like whoa and just ate but got up quick and was like it was the thing when you
check your shin
later and you go oh it's just busted but dude i remember that just butt and
they're like are you
all right and they're like all right yeah what what did you not see yeah being
in westch