Name: If There's One Thing That You Would Change About Adam Eget
Uploaded: 2021-05-28T15:15:23.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'If There's One Thing That You Would Change About Adam Eget' from I'm not Norm on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-05-28. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'If There's One Thing That You Would Change About Adam Eget' from I'm not Norm on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-05-28. Transcript available.

If there was one thing that you would change about Adam Ega, what would it be?
Oh, where do I start?
This guy says your face looks like a cunt.
I can't even change that.
It's not the first time I've heard that, but I mean.
You know what I don't like is when you make those dirty drinks.
Dirty Sanchez?
Dirty Sanchez.
That's what you drink.
Dirty drinks.
No, they say like.
Pussy.
Huh?
Like the pink pussy.
You don't have to be dirty.
The guy.
I don't realize there's a TV camera.
You guys.
This is like your little brother.
God damn, man.
You have such control.
And this morning, Adam Ega?
Is that your name?
Fucking change it.
The latest Archie.
Adam Ega telling a joke.
The latest Archie comic shows gay character Kevin kissing his boyfriend, Devin.
Another barrier will be broken next month when in a dream sequence, Jughead
will be show fisting Betty Crocker.
God damn, you're illiterate.
Why is it so different to find pornography about people in stable, monogamous
relationships?
Why is it so what?
Different.
Different?
Difficult.
God damn.
Start all over and the joke still works.
Oh my God.
Michelle Obama has booked a cameo on the ABC show Nashville.
Start again.
Start again.
Kids today.
You can't spell A-B-C.
Wow.
Michelle Obama has booked a cameo on the ABC show Nashville.
With this and her appearance on iCarly, I think Michelle is ready to start
appearing in films.
May I suggest my favorite film series, Black Ass Fuckers.
Let's action.
Adam Ega told me something I didn't know.
He said you worked with Red Fox on a variety.
Yeah, I heard that.
I'm dying to hear.
I produced Red Fox variety.
You told me he just worked on it.
Worked on it.
Well, that's, I mean, according to your Wikipedia.
What do you think I was, a stagehand, you douchebag?
Worked on it.
Did you, did you do your notes?
Lose the douchebag.
He's talking about me.
Well, we don't know if he's talking about you.
He's clearly talking about me.
He is talking about you.
What's the deal with that fucking douchebag?
Plus some douchebag, I don't know who he was, but I like to punch him right in
the fucking face.
Adam had a question he wanted to ask you about your comedy.
Yeah, I've been, I've been shopping at the bits to ask this one.
I've been thinking about it all week.
Norm told me to come up with some questions for you, and I've just been dying
to know.
Where do you get your ideas from?
Nora Ephron walked off the show.
Yeah.
Right, and so did Sinead O'Connor, I think, right?
I was there for that one, too.
You were there for Sinead O'Connor?
Yeah.
There was Nora Dunn, by the way.
Oh, no, I meant when Dice did it, Sinead, you know.
Was that the same show?
No, that wasn't the same show.
No, she said she didn't want to do it because Dice was professional.
They had to get a different musical guest.
This guy, you can hire this guy to ruin all the interviews?
No, so how about this?
Sometimes I'm beginning to worry about my short-term memory loss.
That was the, oh.
Sometimes I'm beginning to worry about my short-term memory loss.
Sometimes I'm beginning to worry about my short-term memory loss.
That was it.
I thought he was talking about his first Twitter name.
I was like, that's a really long Twitter name.
Real Ed McMahon over here, huh?
Ed McBoy.
Ed Mc...
What was your joke?
You had one joke?
No, it was so ridiculous.
It was stupid.
What was it?
Oh, God, man.
It was something like, don't take a shot from a girl at a bar
because it looks ridiculous.
It's never good.
I think the punchline was, is this a Care Bear cum shot or something?
It was really ridiculous.
I don't remember it.
It was so long ago.
But that was the gist of it, and that's why I don't do stand-up anymore.
He can't even tell his own joke.
I mean, I'm not a good, you know...
Anything.
Yeah, clearly.
I mean, it's like...
Earlier this week, Aaron Jackson of Topeka, Kansas, painted his house the
colors of the
gay pride rainbow flag in direct protest of the Westboro Baptist Church.
When that didn't seem to work, Jackson fucked three of his best buds on his
front lawn.
Homophobic.
Yeah.
Well, I think it shows...
I mean, earlier he was racist, and now he's homophobic.
Well, I think it is.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I think it is.
Former Tennessee Titans cheerleader Elizabeth Lee Garner, 42, is accused of
pulling a 12-year-old
boy's pants off and offering immoral sex.
The boy refused her advances, not because he was 12, but because he was a die-hard
Colts fan.
This is what I have to work with, you know?
Chipotle has canceled its planned sponsorship of the Utah Boy Scout event due
to the BSA's
ban on gay leaders and scouts.
Ironic.
How an all-male anti-gay organization would want to put hot, thick loads of
beef and sour cream
in the mouth.
Okay, okay, okay, okay.
We get the idea.
You hate gay guys.
We first met, I met you, underneath the Queensborough Bridge.
You, at the time, were jerking off punks for $15 a man.
My whole family's watching, man.
My grandmother.
Your family doesn't know that when you were a young man, you used to jerk off
punks for
$15 a man?
What's the joke?
Holocaust denier.
Awesome.
I'm not going to hold that against you.
He doesn't believe in the, whatever.
What?
I never got to go to camp.
He doesn't believe in the Holocaust.
I never went to camp when I was a kid.
Is that a good change of subject?
He doesn't believe that the Holocaust happened.
Do you believe, do you not believe that?
I had a bar mitzvah again.
Why would you have a bar mitzvah if you didn't believe the Holocaust happened?
Jesus, every time.
This is the closest I've seen to him admitting to the Holocaust, where he said,
I think people
have died.
He's like, six million, six hundred.
What's the difference?
Well, there's a lot of difference.
There's a huge difference.
There's something beautiful about this one.
I'm not joking.
I'm not being ironic.
No, I really loved it, too.
It was great.
Oh, that's great.
Too bad this guy was here.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm not joking.