Name: "Patrice O'Neal Was the Funniest Guy In the World" - Norm Macdonald
Uploaded: 2021-08-18T16:16:41.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video '"Patrice O'Neal Was the Funniest Guy In the World" - Norm Macdonald' from I'm not Norm on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-08-18. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video '"Patrice O'Neal Was the Funniest Guy In the World" - Norm Macdonald' from I'm not Norm on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-08-18. Transcript available.

when women talk about marriage it's a happy occasion I'm getting married I got
my ring I got my colors picked out I got four of my fat friends to stand next
to
me but it's not the same for the men when men talk about marriage with our
friends it sounds like something you get diagnosed with did you hear what
it happened to Charles no what he's getting married no you could go to
nightclubs and meet women but I don't like going to nightclubs everybody in the
nightclub is a liar the men are lying the women are lying you got older women
in
the club trying to look young but you know they older because they got that
vaccine mark on their arm
the comedian that you remind me of do you know I'm speaking of no he was of
my favorite comedian he passed away a couple years ago Patrice O'Neill the
reason I love Patrice was he had his own truth and he was going to tell you and
he
wasn't gonna take any prisoners and that's a giant void to fill Patrice O'Neill
because I felt he was the funniest guy in the world when he passed away I mean
did
you watch the Charlie Sheen one yes yes and I tell you what I'm sorry well what
do you like it I mean what because like a lot of people are saying that that
was
just it's there's no line whatsoever and that you know it is something other
than
just being funny and that it's gotten you know kind of just brutal and painful
to
watch right well yeah like is that you know when we get interviewed as comics
like oh people always go like is there any line and we go no but there's lines
of
course there's fucking lines yeah you're a human being well you did but I
remember they were
talking about William Shatner roast already told me this that William Shatner's
fucking wife had just drowned in a pool yeah three months earlier and they had
to
get all the comments together and go look no jokes about his wife drowning and
they're all like yeah fuck yeah what are we gonna do now and I was like what
did
even occur to you to fucking do that joke I still wearing a black ribbon and
his
clothing is torn I love Patrice on that though I because I love Patrice yeah he's
great and he did it I never saw a guy that did the roast so good he he because
he didn't do all that well I mean that line is interesting because it's really
a
personal line our next roaster is Patrice O'Neil you may recognize Patrice from
his
many speaking roles in movies but only if you've sat in front of him in a
theater I
I know I know some of these jokes may come off racist which is why it's
important to remember
that Rosa Parks fought so Patrice could take three seats on the bus
so please welcome a guy who looks like Chris Farley after a mine shaft
explosion the very funny Patrice
thank you very much I uh it's strange cuz I had all this planned shit but I
didn't like I
didn't know William Shatner was gonna be quasi like a old racist man like but
but everybody's giggling like
oh he's but you're a fucking asshole Captain Kirk what are you talking about
like I don't respect
him but I respect him cuz he's fucking Captain Kirk but I think he might be
racist cuz his
hair plugs look like black girls pussy hair this is fucking amazing like I wasn't
gonna be mean to
you know Anthony I don't know him I never met him like like so I'm sitting here
watching him and I'm
like he has way too much confidence like in my world he's an open mic nobody
knows him and nobody
like nobody should like nobody should fucking know Anthony uh I refuse to learn
his last shitty name
I learned Galifianakis that's the last shitty last name this nigga's gonna
learn in this fucking funky town
he reminds me of a medieval restaurant waiter like
his old demeanor like hello may I welcome to and you just want to go shut the
fuck up
and bring me my giant turkey leg you fucking nothing
how the fuck can I be too mean after all this shit I can't believe it I'm dying
of diabetes and you
motherfuckers are like oh that evil fat buff you know
I consider Seth a icon I do like I got a critique about Seth it's too much Seth
it's like it's almost
it's almost like he's jealous of his own creation where he wants to prove I'm
better than the cartoons but he's not better than the cartoons see but I think
the problem is with Seth is that he don't have a partner you know like the
South Park guys or Hanna Barbera
I know we've read that old story that uh Hanna once said I'm bigger than Yogi
and Barbera slapped the shit out of him for saying that
Seth needs a Barbera
to slap him and slap him twice
once to say hey man don't forget why people love you
and two just say you're gay
no
no straight man writes that many show tunes that's a fact
I love Mike Tyson and I don't have much to say I as a fan of Mike Tyson as a
fan as a I love him and I don't mean
fuck you
I love you man
I'm just disappointed and hurt at how much comfort white people have around you
now I don't I don't like it
and Steve-O this new subdued not drunk you it fucking stinks man
ride that whole Steve-O shit till the wheels come off man let a fucking leech
bite your eyeballs and do some goofy shit even your fake puncher it just you
disturb me with your lack of edge you just like
why are you still looking at me like that Mr. Shatner sir you like boy I had
more for that nigga that I didn't say it I should have said it because he's an
asshole
you're telling it as it is
you're telling it as it is
you're telling it as it is
man Jeff Ross I love you I guess
look Jeff Ross is a legend his funniness is a legend but when I say legend I
mean a myth
like the Loch Ness monster or Bigfoot like we all believe they exist but who
really ever saw it
oh shit
oh shit
oh shit
i've turned down mini roasts I have about three or four of them and I said yes
to this and I'm dead ass serious I said yes to this because uh
I respect Charlie Sheen I do I say yes because I respect not not
not not not his body of work like not
it's all been very Christian slayerish like it just like
he sucks but he's he's good but he sucks at the same time
I think that his stand that he made
uh...
he sucks but he's he's good but he sucks at the same time
I think that his stand that he made
uh... against the business I think this is a fucked up business but he stood up
he he still survived uh...
and he proved that nobody can keep like a Sheen down you know
they can keep uh... Estevez down cause his brother
and he's the good one that motherfucker do everything right and that nigga's
career is over holy shit
fuck tiger blood he's selling his own blood to make money man
but I I want to say to your eyes man I I I I love that you stood up to what you
thought was wrong and uh...
I'm impressed by you and I wanted to say that so thank you man thanks for
having me y'all take care thank you
Thank you.