Name: Norm Macdonald Shitting on Matthew Perry
Uploaded: 2021-10-18T13:34:08.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Norm Macdonald Shitting on Matthew Perry' from I'm not Norm on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-10-18. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Norm Macdonald Shitting on Matthew Perry' from I'm not Norm on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-10-18. Transcript available.

I used to really have problems with handsome people like friends, you know?
Yeah, it would bother me so much. I watched friends and I said fuck these are
the funniest super handsome people ever
I'll give that to them. You know, I mean who are you guys probably harder if
you're so fucking handsome
I think I heard Matthew Perry once in an interview, but I think basically said
he invented sarcasm
Norm Norma was on Saturday Night Live. Norm tells the best fucking stories
about some of those celebrities that went through there and
Matthew Perry had an assistant and said, you know, Matt
He said the norm Matt wants to do a sketch that he wants you to be in where he
talks like he does on friends
He calls it Matt speak and norm so what are you talking about? He goes he goes
Well, you know, he invented a way of talking the way he talks on friends Matt
speak and he showed him a clip and I said
Are you talking about sorry?
Matthew Perry called sarcasm he renamed it Matt speak
Hilarious
And Norm goes, you're talking about sarcasm?
What about the black odd couple?
They should have just said to him
Oh, that was really good
I think somebody, one of the younger writers said
I think Matthew Perry's a genius
I think that's what it was
And Norm said, is he good at math or something?
Excuse me, is this sarcasm 101?
No, it's Lamaze class for men named Arthur
Oh, okay, sorry
I'm kidding
It is sarcasm 101
Be more gullible
Take any seat you want
Except that one
I'm kidding, sit down
It's really hard to tell
Thank you
Oh, and class, whoever parked in my space
Thank you
I enjoyed the walk
You're welcome
Yeah, there's nothing like an hour in the rain
Oh, wait, wait, wait
Oh, I get it
You're saying that because you don't want him to park in your spot
Very good
You win the trip to Jamaica
Hey, wait a minute
You didn't say there's a prize
Wow, could you be any stupider?
Okay, last week's assignment was how you would describe the food in England
Jane
Oh, the food is so good there
Kevin
When my dad eats, he sounds like a pig
No, no, that couldn't be more wrong
But
And just so you know, Kevin
I don't like it when you say things
My dad's from England
See, I see your mouth moving
And I hear all these sounds
But it's just like coming out like
My dad, my dad
Okay, quick pop quiz for everybody
Okay?
You walk into a bar
And you see a fat, ugly, disgusting guy in the corner
You turn to your friends and you say what?
Could he be any larger?
Could he be any uglier?
He looks like my dad
Whoa, Kevin, try again
He looks a great deal like my dad
I don't see what's so funny
It is a shocker
I nominate Marissa for class president
Because of her incisive wit
Hey
You people just don't know when to stop
Why don't you cry about it?
I want to take a bath with Marissa
I mean, that is to say
Could I want more to
Can I take a bath with Marissa?
My teaching assistant
She was faking?
Catch on slower
Hey
I don't think she's really a student
Be a bigger moron
Can I still take a bath with you?
Another Norm joke
But he sort of
Again, that thing pisses up
That area pisses him off
As much as it does us
He was at an SNL after party
This to me was put perfectly
I'm not going to say the comic's name
Because
You know
I don't know
Permission from Norm
But anyway
Harvey Weinstein was holding court
He was talking about
He had seen that scene of alternative comedy
And he had seen somebody
That everybody
You know
At that moment was the king of that
That's all
And
You know
Harvey Weinstein
I've been
Like seeing him at work
He's very like obnoxious
Like he just yells shit out
That he
You know
He thinks is brilliant
Like Stephen Wright jokes
Or something
Right
You know
You can't have everything
Where would you put it?
So
He goes
He says this guy's name
And Norm's sitting there
He's on the guy
With Lorne and everybody
And he's holding
And Harvey Weinstein
Says this person's name
And goes
I think sometimes
Is a genius
And then he looks at Norm
And goes
Norm what do you think?
And he goes
Is he good at math or something?
And it's like
Okay
Okay
The ballsy part is
Now Weinstein looks like an asshole
And people are like
And you know
From that moment on
One of the most powerful guys in the world
Doesn't
Hates
With a passion
Norm McDone