Name: Norm Macdonald Shitting on Mark Zuckerberg and Billionaires
Uploaded: 2021-11-11T13:56:37.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Norm Macdonald Shitting on Mark Zuckerberg and Billionaires' from I'm not Norm on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-11-11. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Norm Macdonald Shitting on Mark Zuckerberg and Billionaires' from I'm not Norm on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-11-11. Transcript available.

Business news, Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg is facing a $1 billion tax bill
this year.
He pays a billion dollars in taxes?
In tax. That's a lot of money.
Good problem to have, right Tom?
Yeah, that's not bad.
God damn.
Absolutely. A billion dollars.
A billion dollars? That's more than my dad made in his lifetime.
Yeah.
Unbelievable. This guy's carping about that. How old is this guy?
I don't know. I think he's in his mid-20s maybe?
Yeah, damn.
And most of these, I think, I feel these rich kids are unknown.
Yeah.
You know what I mean? Like he's known because of that movie.
Yeah.
But I think most of them.
I think that these super billionaire guys keep themselves unknown so we don't
find out and go to their house.
Oh, yeah. He's probably not the real, you know,
he's just sort of like the, you know, there's, there's, there's much bigger
billionaires.
You think there's bigger guys?
Oh, I think there's, they're, yeah, they're living on an island somewhere.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And they're just running everything.
Because when you hear about it, how much money the richest guys have.
Yeah.
Nobody, I mean, I'm an, I know Sandler, he doesn't have nearly that much money.
You know what I mean?
And he's the richest guy and he's super rich.
If you're, if you're, if you were, if you had, you know, you probably don't
want to make a big show.
No.
Yeah, they probably have the cure for cancer.
They're probably selling all the, you know, all the drugs that we're all taking,
all the drugs.
They're selling all that stuff.
Yeah, yeah.
They got all the cures.
They're living on an island.
The United Paramount Network's new show, Star Trek Voyager, finished in first
place Monday night with a 14.7 rating.
For those of you who don't know, one rating point is equal to 950,000 nerds.
Well, this week, world chess champion Gary Kasparov defeated an IBM computer in
their six-game chess series.
Experts are calling the encounter between chess wizard and supercomputer
historic because, for the first time ever, it brought together both geeks and
nerds.
After numerous requests, the National Institute of Health has finally granted
funds to the University of New Mexico in order to test mice for the deadly Hantavirus.
Although, I'm sure the government would have acted a lot sooner if, instead of
mice, the Hantavirus was killing off rich white guys.
And in Brunswick, Maine, an outbreak of the deadly canine parvovirus has led to
the local Humane Society killing many of its dogs.
Gee, I wonder if the Humane Society would kill off victims of canine parvo if,
instead of dogs, they were rich old white guys.
Wildlife officials in Maryland say that increased hunting will be necessary to
control the state's black bear population.
Gee, I wonder if hunting would be the answer if, instead of overpopulation of
black bears, there were an overpopulation of rich old white men.
Man.
Man.
Man.
Man.
Man.
Man, I won.
Those are the motherfuckers that fucking introduced crack into my neighborhood
last month.
Do you have a crack problem?
Well, now I do because those fuckers, those fuckers, those fuckers introduce
crack into the neighborhood.
Really?
And what they don't tell you about crack is, god damn, it's good.
Yeah.
Where in your neighborhood there's a crack?
Yeah, huge crack problem.
So you can just step out the front door now and there's a crack readily
available now?
Well, I sell it.
Yeah.
So, but I, I'm using so much of it now.
Yeah.
But I'm still getting fat.
Yeah.
Well.
I don't quite understand.
How is that even possible?
I don't know.
I was going to ask you that.
I have to talk to a gastroenterologist.
You don't have any now, do you?
Any, any crack now?
Oh, no.
I don't, no.
You smoke it all.
After you do it for a while, you do not share.
Yeah.
I learned that one the harder.
You go, I'm out.
I'm out.
But meanwhile, you're not out and you do everyone else's crack with them.
Yeah.
And then you sneak off into the bathroom and do your own crack.
Right.
Yeah.
Good idea.
Good idea.
Morphine's good too.
There's one called Crocodile.
Have you ever heard of Crocodile?
No.
I haven't.
In international news.