Name: David Spade Talks About Norm Macdonald
Uploaded: 2021-12-03T22:11:43.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'David Spade Talks About Norm Macdonald' from I'm not Norm on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-12-03. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'David Spade Talks About Norm Macdonald' from I'm not Norm on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-12-03. Transcript available.

this is stupid but on my phone this guy you'll laugh at this maybe a lot of
people get these
pictures or tattoos you know like a me as joe dirt you know they send you a lot
of you get a lot of
tattoos of stuff like things you say or photos or whatever they send me ones of
farley or whatever
so this this guy sends me one of he's got norm of all morons on his hand norm mcdonald
so i text
norm i go i just send it to him i go hey you have fans and then i put princey's
fan
all we know is for sure this one guy and then um and then of course like days
later david hello
it's me norm how are you have you ever texted with norm it's no i haven't no
times a thousand he just
goes he waits days and then at three in the morning hello i go norm what are
you are you answering me
from four days ago is that what you're doing dave it's norm do you like money
yes
norm i like money why would you like to have more money than all your wildest
dreams
yes i would and then an hour later would you like to walk into a dealership and
point to a car and
then just buy it i go of course i how and then three hours later bet the over
in the blackhawks game
the first period or something i go oh okay too bad that game was six days ago
now uh david uh let me
ask you something i understand that on this uh here comes the funny tour there's
a group chat yes that
you guys have engaged in how's that going well uh obviously we all just make
fun of each other and uh
uh rob got a good one in on adam because adam's not off limits he really pretends
to be one of the guys
and uh he says hey i'm fair game but uh rob goes hey adam you know when you do
the show you should
tape it and then you see where the jokes don't work and then take those jokes
out of your act and
put better ones in he goes that's what i do
by the way i just want to say about the private jet sometimes adam's nice
enough to actually let us go up
front where he sits david spade uh and i have had a hell of a time well he's
been a good man to me i'll
tell you that when we get home at night we all get this hotel and then when we
walk up me and norm
on the same floor and then uh separate from adam and then uh we go up and then
norm goes hey want to
cruise in for a while but i'm sort of the biggest person to i always go to bed
early i go now i'm gonna
crash and uh probably take a bath just crash you guys you can uh you can take
one here and we get
some food i'm like no thanks cosby i mean i'm just gonna come on in he goes we'll
order food we'll have
some fun we'll talk play games i go i wish a chick would ever do this my life
so i go uh no i go i'm
just gonna cruise he goes all right and then next thing he goes he's with
everyone he goes last night
spade i order all this food for me he blows me off the biggest star it's
amazing how like uh some of
your friends like you know seriously like those guys who came out of saturday
night live like sandler
you chris rock um there's a lot of guys who sort of all of a sudden they're
like real big players
norm got his own tv norm's doing well what do you hang out with norm or is it
impossible it's pretty
impossible because he's crazy he is in l.a i call him and he goes uh he goes i
go what happened last
week i called you to go you called me and i go yeah on my phone i go yeah and
he goes oh yeah yeah i got
that i go you didn't call me back no no and he's serious yeah he's crazy and
yeah i know like i have
him on the show though he's the funniest guy around i think you need to be kind
of crazy to be really
funny he is very funny i love him too and and uh he has a gambling problem you
know uh yeah yeah yeah
yeah he he he he was telling us how secret he was all excited that he had
eighty thousand he won
eighty thousand dollars in vegas but he lost like a hundred thousand on
basketball right and that's on
nickel slots that's how serious he is did you always know he had a gambling
problem mm-hmm you did when
did you know that it's saturday night live i first made a pee in a bottle
problem right remember that
you always talk yeah it's great and then i know does he still save his urine do
you know uh i don't
know he used to put it in ziploc bag he signed it and sent it to fans is that
true no no but he did
he would take after saturday night live they give you a car a limousine if you
want to go to the
party and he would take it to atlantic city really he's a hard ass he's
hardcore dude i know he'll even
get into fist fights and then he'd stay he'd still stay at a table for hours
and hours what do you
think of that i feel lucky and then you don't even know if he's married or
single it's never really
clear i don't know but i know girls like him he's he's uh you know when you're
that something's that
wrong they they pick up on it and like it they like they they like the tragedy
of that right yeah i'm
gonna i'm gonna make him a regular guy right but never work so we get the
following dennis is almost
impossible yeah and so i got it this time it's me norman dennis i don't even
know the order but
they're both hard to follow they do great norm has replaced super dave now as
comedy's biggest
enigma slash beloved beloved all the other people crazy man yeah yeah but he is
always everyone has
nine norm stories even i have like three norm stories someone said you have
some connection
to norm he wrote for greatland oh he we had mutual friends and uh and he wanted
to write a golf column
about like golf gambling like great he did four and then just we never heard
from him again then
saw him two years later he's like hey i love doing that golf column he's like
he's like what happened
then here's what happened you cut off the world yeah we emailed you repeatedly
and you didn't answer
anything but yeah it was classic it sounds about right if we were in a court i'd
go i can vouch for
the story i know nothing about it i believe your version but with me i go norm
he goes david you
want to have dinner yeah and then i go yeah me and you eating dinner and then
talking about fun old
times sure how about tomorrow night yes and then no word doesn't follow up and
then four weeks later
at three in the morning hello and then 301 david answer me i go norm i can't
play this anymore because
it's funny but it's letterman's love for norm mcdonald is is one of the most i
would watch a documentary
about that too yeah he seems like he just appreciates and loves it the most and
i have no idea why i
busted norm wide open because that last letterman yeah uh he went on this is
how he got so solidified
in yeah so we have the same manager me and uh norm so i go hey gervitz uh he
goes ah did you see norm on
letterman last night i go no i saw some chick bawling why was norm on too and
he goes i'm gonna tell
him i go please do i go norm were you crying on letterman he goes no i i was i
got teary because
i go that's crying go ahead yeah that's tears are crying he goes no because i
love letterman i go i
know but relax right i go we all go on there we all love letterman but and then
i go well guess who's
producing your show the tears paid off i don't know you do my show remember me
i was crying i'm like
worked baby alive cries uh i know it's funny but it's a good thing to bust his
balls actually i have
to say one of my favorite things i've done and i haven't seen is me on norm
show on netflix i oh
it was probably a year or two ago a year ago when he did his show he had 10
episodes i was the first one
yeah so i didn't know what i was doing i didn't know if i knew it was on netflix
i didn't know i just
he said isn't it yeah our friendship's a total one-way street will you do me a
favor and then
when you ask me for one i'll disappear i go of course not so so i go i go all
right so i go on
this thing and i'm sort of just on it i don't know we started we're just
talking yeah you know like we
were talking when i came in right and then he goes all right let no he didn't
say that he goes let's go
to a commercial and i go oh are we on and we're going to a commercial i don't
know we started
i had like a can of you know la croix or something i go he didn't do an intro
up here can i no one's
even i was talking to my assistant i was just screwing off waiting for the
because you just sit
down no one says a word and it was funny and i liked it and then people would
say i like the show
because first of all some would go i love that you guys are great friends
someone say are you guys
even friends because it was such an oddball weirdo thing that and i didn't even
let myself watch it
because i go i just like the idea of remembering it and going it was weird and
then i would bust his
balls about something and then he would drop me about something and get on my
ass and then it was over
and i gave him i gave him another hard out but i gave him 90. and he goes i
hear you have to leave
after and i go you have to continue life you who wants to sit here for 90
minutes and talk stupid
shit i anyway i don't i go i have 10 minutes of stories norm you are and you
want me here for 90.
so 80 is going to be dead air so all right so your show is 11 30 monday tuesday
wednesday thursday
this is a wrap-up it is right going over an hour did i go over an hour well i
could keep going but i
i didn't i didn't you complained earlier about when you're with somebody for 90
minutes i know i'll
complain after you can come back oh this is norm are you on his show right now
all right i'll tell
him i did this and get him mad i wrote 30 golf columns for him no it was really
four do you like
tweets to get one like come to my site i go you can't describe putting during
you know not describe
putting that's fine but he just he just is a play-by-play announcer of a golf
game it's the weirdest use of
twitter anyone's ever done where he's like good pup by tiger i know that's why
you like him though
great wedge by koepka i go oh go back 10 you got three likes on this one i go
it's only because no
one can keep up with it they're like oh i want to oh there's another one there's
another one oh i feel
like it's a bit on how dumb twitter is yeah maybe it might be a long play yeah
it's it's it's a seven
year i can't wait till he's on the show because we were saying who should i put
him with and he goes
david i i love your show he like analyzing he's smart yeah and he also goes i
like when sometimes
there's comics that don't know oh i won't say that but he just says uh david i
won't do any written
stuff let's just do something i go of course i go what's written we do we bring
up a subject miley
cyrus makes out with that chick she likes a little whisker biscuit now right
just say whatever you want
that's all i do i go she eats at the soup kitchen i go just say whatever cracks
you up and he goes
yeah she dines at the y and he goes yeah stuff like that and then i go well
when you want to come on
crickets and then three days later great show last night here's every i want to
sit with you no one
else around you respect me don't you i will tell you the good and the bad of
the show and don't worry it's
mostly good i go great of course i want to hear what you think you're good david
do you understand
no one else can be there it's me and you oh he doesn't want two other people i
want no just when
he tells me yeah dinner he goes you're doing a lot of things right and i want
to confirm because
if you respect me which i think you do who cares what these other say i'm going
to tell you
i like it and that means it's good i go of course he has to reiterate that 50
times i go when do you
want dinner crickets nine days later hello david do you still have your phone
yes norm i just was
asleep at 3 a.m like the rest of the planet do you think there should be a
podcast of just people
discussing their experiences and friendships with norm and donald everyone
loves norm because it's too
everyone loves the title it's too interesting because he's this is what you don't
know how much is an act
what's not but he does get you and he doesn't want to drive then i go then when
they because he lives
like a marina i go no one wants to come get you in the marina no one's going to
the marina for
anything at six o'clock if you want to go eat and then uber came i go norm now
we're going to be best
friends i'll pay for it i'm going to send a new again i don't want to get in
that car with a
stranger oh we had this whole thing fixed you don't want to get in an uber geez
it could be easier
when does he officially move to palm springs or palm desert or one of those
types of places and
retire like super dave did no and then just tell just constantly tell you he's
coming back hey i'm
going to be in l.a on tuesday that feels like the next phase for i get excited
because he's very elusive
so it's fun we hang out because he's credit garbo of the comedians yeah but he
is he's fun and he's
good looking i always say you look like paul newman huh i go you know you're
tall and cool looking all
these girls were into him like quietly like you'd hear these norm's hot he's
still my favorite weekend
update guy yeah he's great he's crazy it's he really really thrived on not
getting a laugh
yeah he enjoyed it more than anyone who ever did and i go by the way it's down
your whole thing of
not getting laughs don't you don't have to drag that whole thing to my show i
just never see anything
do the crazy one where you get laughs and then go back but have you always corolla
smart oh sorry
that wasn't that was my zipper corolla is uh it's coming on yeah yeah i would
say corolla i don't know
be good for this format he's coming on and i saw him the other night at one of
those clubs he's great
yeah he's we're ready for him we got all these we got bill burr and i think
gaffey oh jim jeffers together we've got uh just pretty much every comic
eventually coming on so it's
good well thanks for coming on this i appreciate it this is fun good luck with
the show i'm glad you're
doing it uh sorry i got lost on the lot but it's it's understandable with this
lot thank you
i've seen a guy kill that heart and bomb that heart and it's a gift a gift that
people would
pay that me a gift to pay that much for a ticket and he could still walk them
didn't matter what the
price they would leave and when he killed he killed hard very hard to follow we
did a tour i'll show you
a few pictures from the tour that our friend julia jones took she sent me this
weekend i think they're
great and they're very cool norm watching me on stage i'm watching him in there
i've never seen him

David Spade Talks About Norm Macdonald

this is stupid but on my phone this guy you'll laugh at this maybe a lot of
people get these
pictures or tattoos you know like a me as joe dirt you know they send you a lot
of you get a lot of
tattoos of stuff like things you say or photos or whatever they send me ones of
farley or whatever
so this this guy sends me one of he's got norm of all morons on his hand norm mcdonald
so i text
norm i go i just send it to him i go hey you have fans and then i put princey's
fan
all we know is for sure this one guy and then um and then of course like days
later david hello
it's me norm how are you have you ever texted with norm it's no i haven't no
times a thousand he just
goes he waits days and then at three in the morning hello i go norm what are
you are you answering me
from four days ago is that what you're doing dave it's norm do you like money
yes
norm i like money why would you like to have more money than all your wildest
dreams
yes i would and then an hour later would you like to walk into a dealership and
point to a car and
then just buy it i go of course i how and then three hours later bet the over
in the blackhawks game
the first period or something i go oh okay too bad that game was six days ago
now uh david uh let me
ask you something i understand that on this uh here comes the funny tour there's
a group chat yes that
you guys have engaged in how's that going well uh obviously we all just make
fun of each other and uh
uh rob got a good one in on adam because adam's not off limits he really pretends
to be one of the guys
and uh he says hey i'm fair game but uh rob goes hey adam you know when you do
the show you should
tape it and then you see where the jokes don't work and then take those jokes
out of your act and
put better ones in he goes that's what i do
by the way i just want to say about the private jet sometimes adam's nice
enough to actually let us go up
front where he sits david spade uh and i have had a hell of a time well he's
been a good man to me i'll
tell you that when we get home at night we all get this hotel and then when we
walk up me and norm
on the same floor and then uh separate from adam and then uh we go up and then
norm goes hey want to
cruise in for a while but i'm sort of the biggest person to i always go to bed
early i go now i'm gonna
crash and uh probably take a bath just crash you guys you can uh you can take
one here and we get
some food i'm like no thanks cosby i mean i'm just gonna come on in he goes we'll
order food we'll have
some fun we'll talk play games i go i wish a chick would ever do this my life
so i go uh no i go i'm
just gonna cruise he goes all right and then next thing he goes he's with
everyone he goes last night
spade i order all this food for me he blows me off the biggest star it's
amazing how like uh some of
your friends like you know seriously like those guys who came out of saturday
night live like sandler
you chris rock um there's a lot of guys who sort of all of a sudden they're
like real big players
norm got his own tv norm's doing well what do you hang out with norm or is it
impossible it's pretty
impossible because he's crazy he is in l.a i call him and he goes uh he goes i
go what happened last
week i called you to go you called me and i go yeah on my phone i go yeah and
he goes oh yeah yeah i got
that i go you didn't call me back no no and he's serious yeah he's crazy and
yeah i know like i have
him on the show though he's the funniest guy around i think you need to be kind
of crazy to be really
funny he is very funny i love him too and and uh he has a gambling problem you
know uh yeah yeah yeah
yeah he he he he was telling us how secret he was all excited that he had
eighty thousand he won
eighty thousand dollars in vegas but he lost like a hundred thousand on
basketball right and that's on
nickel slots that's how serious he is did you always know he had a gambling
problem mm-hmm you did when
did you know that it's saturday night live i first made a pee in a bottle
problem right remember that
you always talk yeah it's great and then i know does he still save his urine do
you know uh i don't
know he used to put it in ziploc bag he signed it and sent it to fans is that
true no no but he did
he would take after saturday night live they give you a car a limousine if you
want to go to the
party and he would take it to atlantic city really he's a hard ass he's
hardcore dude i know he'll even
get into fist fights and then he'd stay he'd still stay at a table for hours
and hours what do you
think of that i feel lucky and then you don't even know if he's married or
single it's never really
clear i don't know but i know girls like him he's he's uh you know when you're
that something's that
wrong they they pick up on it and like it they like they they like the tragedy
of that right yeah i'm
gonna i'm gonna make him a regular guy right but never work so we get the
following dennis is almost
impossible yeah and so i got it this time it's me norman dennis i don't even
know the order but
they're both hard to follow they do great norm has replaced super dave now as
comedy's biggest
enigma slash beloved beloved all the other people crazy man yeah yeah but he is
always everyone has
nine norm stories even i have like three norm stories someone said you have
some connection
to norm he wrote for greatland oh he we had mutual friends and uh and he wanted
to write a golf column
about like golf gambling like great he did four and then just we never heard
from him again then
saw him two years later he's like hey i love doing that golf column he's like
he's like what happened
then here's what happened you cut off the world yeah we emailed you repeatedly
and you didn't answer
anything but yeah it was classic it sounds about right if we were in a court i'd
go i can vouch for
the story i know nothing about it i believe your version but with me i go norm
he goes david you
want to have dinner yeah and then i go yeah me and you eating dinner and then
talking about fun old
times sure how about tomorrow night yes and then no word doesn't follow up and
then four weeks later
at three in the morning hello and then 301 david answer me i go norm i can't
play this anymore because
it's funny but it's letterman's love for norm mcdonald is is one of the most i
would watch a documentary
about that too yeah he seems like he just appreciates and loves it the most and
i have no idea why i
busted norm wide open because that last letterman yeah uh he went on this is
how he got so solidified
in yeah so we have the same manager me and uh norm so i go hey gervitz uh he
goes ah did you see norm on
letterman last night i go no i saw some chick bawling why was norm on too and
he goes i'm gonna tell
him i go please do i go norm were you crying on letterman he goes no i i was i
got teary because
i go that's crying go ahead yeah that's tears are crying he goes no because i
love letterman i go i
know but relax right i go we all go on there we all love letterman but and then
i go well guess who's
producing your show the tears paid off i don't know you do my show remember me
i was crying i'm like
worked baby alive cries uh i know it's funny but it's a good thing to bust his
balls actually i have
to say one of my favorite things i've done and i haven't seen is me on norm
show on netflix i oh
it was probably a year or two ago a year ago when he did his show he had 10
episodes i was the first one
yeah so i didn't know what i was doing i didn't know if i knew it was on netflix
i didn't know i just
he said isn't it yeah our friendship's a total one-way street will you do me a
favor and then
when you ask me for one i'll disappear i go of course not so so i go i go all
right so i go on
this thing and i'm sort of just on it i don't know we started we're just
talking yeah you know like we
were talking when i came in right and then he goes all right let no he didn't
say that he goes let's go
to a commercial and i go oh are we on and we're going to a commercial i don't
know we started
i had like a can of you know la croix or something i go he didn't do an intro
up here can i no one's
even i was talking to my assistant i was just screwing off waiting for the
because you just sit
down no one says a word and it was funny and i liked it and then people would
say i like the show
because first of all some would go i love that you guys are great friends
someone say are you guys
even friends because it was such an oddball weirdo thing that and i didn't even
let myself watch it
because i go i just like the idea of remembering it and going it was weird and
then i would bust his
balls about something and then he would drop me about something and get on my
ass and then it was over
and i gave him i gave him another hard out but i gave him 90. and he goes i
hear you have to leave
after and i go you have to continue life you who wants to sit here for 90
minutes and talk stupid
shit i anyway i don't i go i have 10 minutes of stories norm you are and you
want me here for 90.
so 80 is going to be dead air so all right so your show is 11 30 monday tuesday
wednesday thursday
this is a wrap-up it is right going over an hour did i go over an hour well i
could keep going but i
i didn't i didn't you complained earlier about when you're with somebody for 90
minutes i know i'll
complain after you can come back oh this is norm are you on his show right now
all right i'll tell
him i did this and get him mad i wrote 30 golf columns for him no it was really
four do you like
tweets to get one like come to my site i go you can't describe putting during
you know not describe
putting that's fine but he just he just is a play-by-play announcer of a golf
game it's the weirdest use of
twitter anyone's ever done where he's like good pup by tiger i know that's why
you like him though
great wedge by koepka i go oh go back 10 you got three likes on this one i go
it's only because no
one can keep up with it they're like oh i want to oh there's another one there's
another one oh i feel
like it's a bit on how dumb twitter is yeah maybe it might be a long play yeah
it's it's it's a seven
year i can't wait till he's on the show because we were saying who should i put
him with and he goes
david i i love your show he like analyzing he's smart yeah and he also goes i
like when sometimes
there's comics that don't know oh i won't say that but he just says uh david i
won't do any written
stuff let's just do something i go of course i go what's written we do we bring
up a subject miley
cyrus makes out with that chick she likes a little whisker biscuit now right
just say whatever you want
that's all i do i go she eats at the soup kitchen i go just say whatever cracks
you up and he goes
yeah she dines at the y and he goes yeah stuff like that and then i go well
when you want to come on
crickets and then three days later great show last night here's every i want to
sit with you no one
else around you respect me don't you i will tell you the good and the bad of
the show and don't worry it's
mostly good i go great of course i want to hear what you think you're good david
do you understand
no one else can be there it's me and you oh he doesn't want two other people i
want no just when
he tells me yeah dinner he goes you're doing a lot of things right and i want
to confirm because
if you respect me which i think you do who cares what these other say i'm going
to tell you
i like it and that means it's good i go of course he has to reiterate that 50
times i go when do you
want dinner crickets nine days later hello david do you still have your phone
yes norm i just was
asleep at 3 a.m like the rest of the planet do you think there should be a
podcast of just people
discussing their experiences and friendships with norm and donald everyone
loves norm because it's too
everyone loves the title it's too interesting because he's this is what you don't
know how much is an act
what's not but he does get you and he doesn't want to drive then i go t