Name: R.I.P. Gilbert Gottfried
Uploaded: 2022-04-13T04:13:11.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'R.I.P. Gilbert Gottfried' from I'm not Norm on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-04-13. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'R.I.P. Gilbert Gottfried' from I'm not Norm on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-04-13. Transcript available.

You know, I'm old enough to remember back to simpler, more innocent times
when the worst thing you'd hear about the news was hijacked jetliners flying
into buildings.
Oh, now, Gilbert, you're going to get into trouble again.
I spoke to Johnny. He loved it.
This is all right.
Yes. He goes, oh, that's a funny joke.
Yeah, I'm not bringing up the fucking tsunamis.
No, but how much money did you lose on that?
A lot more than we lost with the man grade.
The Aflac duck.
Yes.
Did you lose a lot of money?
Uh, no.
In future.
It was $5 a commercial.
It's more than we got for the man grade.
I bet that was a lot of fucking money.
I want to return this duck.
Why?
It's very annoying.
It just says the same thing over and over again.
Go ahead.
Say it.
Say it.
Just once.
Say it.
Like it.
Ah, what?
What about that?
If you're hurt and can't hurt, you'll get cash for bills, rent, food from Aflac.
Okay.
Aflac.
If you're hurt and can't hurt.
This is much better.
At least I learned something.
Because it was set, right?
You didn't act.
Would you go in and just do a whole year as in one?
No, no.
They'd have me come in each time to do a new one.
Oh, they would.
But, and then they wound up firing me, getting a new guy to imitate my voice
for less money.
God damn.
Thus bringing closure to a horrible tragedy.
Now, I got to talk about your commercials, of course.
Now, there's many.
MTV, Pepsi, Subway, Windows XP.
And, of course, there's Aflac.
Yes.
Now, why?
Did something happen?
Aflac, the duck.
You got to check Twitter.
You're the voices of Aflac, the duck, for 11 years.
11, yeah.
2000 to 2011.
This has to be the easiest money.
Do you go in just one time and you did the voice?
No, you have to come in each time and keep recording it.
Right, keep it fresh.
Yes, yes.
Keep the duck fresh.
Because each commercial sounded so different.
So what eventually happened, they fired me.
So there was a tsunami in Japan.
You might have heard about it.
Now, at the time, do you realize that Aflac does 75% of their business in Japan?
I found that out soon enough.
Oh, yeah.
You think they could have told you that?
I done found that out.
So the Twitter account, at Real Gilbert.
Oh, believe me, he makes it clear, too.
Oh, it's real.
Oh, yes.
Joe Schmo.
I'm going to have fun on this.
It's me, Real Gilbert.
He writes, well, okay.
Japan is really advanced.
They don't go to the beach.
The beach comes to them.
What do the Japanese have in common with Howard Stern?
They're both radioactive.
What does every Japanese person have in their apartment?
Floodlights.
I just split up with my girlfriend.
But like the Japanese say, there'll be another one floating by any minute now.
I do remember he was tweeting so much, my light started dimming.
See, but you notice when you're reading the tsunami jokes, everybody here was
laughing.
Yes, that's true.
And see, that's the thing.
That's what matters.
You know what else?
None of us were getting a million dollars.
Yeah.
And also, we waited a good 48 hours afterwards.
Oh, yes.
Well, that always got me when they say too soon.
Why is it okay later?
Yeah, because it's like you can make a joke about the Titanic now.
Right.
And it's like I'm thinking, so if you make a joke about the Titanic now and you're
a good person because you didn't do it back then, then you're saying, okay, I
waited.
Fuck those people who died on the Titanic.
I think the rule is, as long as the Red Cross is still looking for money
specifically for that disaster, you've got to wait on the jokes.
Right, if the 800 number pops on the TV every other hour.
Yeah.
Who do you use for insurance?
Ah, Progressive!
Blue Cross, Blue Shield!
You're very versatile.
You'd like people to know that.
Old State!
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!