Name: Worst Norm Macdonald Interview Ever
Uploaded: 2022-12-22T00:13:45.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Worst Norm Macdonald Interview Ever' from I'm not Norm on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-12-22. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Worst Norm Macdonald Interview Ever' from I'm not Norm on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-12-22. Transcript available.

there's something about norm mcdonald that every time he opens his mouth i
laugh i don't know it's
just the style it's a type of thing you can ask him anything i mean you did you
remember from
saturday night live any accurate weekend update and then did some oj thing and
got taken off by
what's the guy's name who took you off i don't know you don't remember either
yet anyway um aside
from having the same birthday as me you've got problems you're wearing you're
wearing eyeglasses
and the reason why yeah because i swam for two days and got chlorine in my eye
and then
i don't know man i thought i was i had allergies at first but now i go no no
this feels like chlorine
like it burned my eye or something i don't know if that's if that can actually
happen yeah i'll have
to check uh the computer i google um you know computer md and then he tells me
is that the way
it works that's what i do now because i'm a bit of a hypochondriac so that
makes life easy
i'll go uh and i'm reaching the age where you know when you're young you go hey
man my left
arm hurts uh well let's go i'll have some soup but then when you're older you
go oh my left
her so i i it's probably nothing but i could be having a massive heart attack
well if you did that'd
be great publicity for the show oh i don't have one now oh you know i mean if
you're gonna do it do it
here well look everybody be talking about you i get the felicity it would work
yeah yeah i would
we're in a in a cynical world it would work if you had to if you had to do a
show right this minute
yeah can you just turn on a dime and do it a comedy show on what well you're
here yeah no no no forget
me you're at cobs right now i can do it you can do it you just turn yourself on
and off yes sir can we
turn up the volume a little am i not talking about there you go no there you go
so what happened to
your sports gig that wasn't a bad show and that's fun man because i knew about
sports and uh so it's
fun to do something like uh because when i did weekend update we did politics i
don't know anything
about politics oh yeah you do no no why because you're canadian because it
doesn't interest me
it's gossip i'd read it's like reality show to me like if i watch uh like i
sometimes i'll turn it on
and i feel like a moron like a guy's going like there's a politician that i'm
supposed to back or
something and he's like i'm like i'm gonna watch him and then he goes we got to
get america working
again and i go okay what i'm a moron okay so you don't vote this is my guy well
you're an american
citizen right no no you're still canada who's the prime minister of canada um
i don't know don't look at me it's so inconsequential even when you're canadian
you rarely
remember because it doesn't really you know it's much more if you're a canadian
it's much more
important to know the president of the united states than the prime minister of
canada and to know
everybody on a hockey team yeah yeah yeah stephen harper i just got that's his
name that's his name
stephen harper conservative from uh the west coast the west coast being what
vancouver something like
that uh maybe alberta maybe that i think it's alberta you sleep last night i
didn't sleep i haven't slept
like about three days i've been very tired of the sand tires yeah i could have
fooled me yeah well
i thought maybe i was getting a cold i'm not sure i had a oh no that's that did
i shake your hand
i i was i was warning everyone not to yeah i'm paranoid i don't know i am too i'm
like oh so i i
i thought it was just allergies with the chlorine i don't know i may be having
like a a cold or
some gross thing you think i don't know i haven't been but i haven't been
sleeping very well i've been
sleeping but it's a shame we don't have a sleep train to add this this hour i
could have helped you
with that yeah sleep what yeah sleep train it's a sponsor of ours oh sleep
train a sleep train yeah and
they have all these different mattresses oh mattresses i got a mattress you got
a mattress
yeah i got the hardest mattress there was in the store what was that i don't
know what it's called
it's a it was a mattress store i went to and the guy said what do you like this
uh this uh he goes
would you like a heart try harder one i go yeah he goes what about the hardest
one of all i go yeah
so that one was really cool i go i'll get this and it's worked out oh yeah it
doesn't seem to have
it's like sleeping on the floor is it really why don't you just sleep on the
floor it's cheaper
well i would but people tell me i i don't know people tell me i shouldn't and
they also i think
if i roll around a fetal position would be a lot of pressure on my skeleton
against the hard floor
it might be too hard well you could get a pillow for that that's a lot cheaper
go back to the sports
show why they cancel it i don't know i think they uh they said no numbers but i
read that with you
getting like a million a million a night that wasn't bad it was good yeah we
had good numbers i don't
know why they didn't i think that they thought well i mean there is a right
thinking to the when
something has sports in its title no woman will watch therefore you cut the
audience in half
instantly which is a bad that's that's that's not really true a lot of women
who love sports but
no there's not no not that'll watch it oh yeah no well that's not the numbers
show really no the vast
majority of women didn't you know even when like in testing they'd show the
show and then women and
men would like it equally you know what i mean but they were forced in testing
to watch it but in the
thing when it says sports on it that's the lady wants to turn to a different
channel
we're much more uh uh old-fashioned than you think be honest with me on
something
would you be honest with me on something yeah of course because i don't care it's
california i'm not
just running you ripped it all ripped you mean uh steroids no oh no no no no
drip no no no god
no then you're just tired then you're just tired i mean you just come off why
do i just enjoying life
too much just kind of oh no oh god i'm not enjoying life i'm like i'm either
sick i'm taking nyquil
nyquil's like taking drugs well it is kind of yeah they got alcohol in there
yeah i know and i don't
handle alcohol at all but um yeah it makes you sort of like uh it takes away
your stuffed up nose
you know what helps at the expense of being like sort of lightheaded ice cold
studio helps
ice kid is ice cold in the studio trying to help i said i should have a uh uh
because i just came
from l.a where it was deadly like 100 degrees there yeah it was insane so this
is our heat wave
it's going to be like 86 lloyd's at 86 today in the city cool that is going to
be very cold that's cold
yeah yeah no 86s i'm down by the water so it should be cold there i can imagine
doing it also i think
my voice is real low like because i because i'm so nasal for my thing that's
what i think that's why
i think i'm ripped because i realize i'm so nasal i'm kind of slurring and yeah
i gotta look i gotta
get more energy but the energy will be very false because i'm so breathless
would you rather be doing
this show or would you rather be me having to do the interview okay 8080810 if
you want to have fun
with the eternal question ain't it ever 8080810 ronowen's pgo
i'll be searching for what's missing but the answer
i remember as a little kid i was like eight years old and i was behind my
garage i was sneaking a
cigarette back there and my dad caught me i'll never forget it and he grabbed
me and he hauled me in and
and i thought i was in for the strapping of my life you know what he is he
pulled out his giant cigar
must have the size of my arm this big cigar stuck in my mouth lit it up made me
smoke it all the way
through right to the end that's when i started smoking cigars real happy that
of course is normal
now how would you you just did you hear yourself just now yeah you think you
sound the same no i don't
sound anything like that that was when i was like young and i was like when i
did my act i was like in
dead dead fear so like my voice would like go octaves up you know what i mean
in fear of what
people not liking it i don't know no no i wasn't really i didn't really care if
people liked anything
well yeah i have this thing where i went if i'm afraid if i go on uh stage i'll
have a big heart
attack and croak and then you know i always think that you do yeah again it'd
be good publicity for
the club i mean you're gonna be where you know you're gonna be over at cobs
this week yeah we could
help him out a little bit nothing wrong with that yeah no i don't i have
nothing against being a martyr
all right for comedy for free speech i'm gonna i'm gonna need help on this 8080810
folks you help
interview them okay let's have fun rachel san jose start it off good morning hi
good morning ron
um i just wanted to tell you norm that i've loved you for so long and i really
love uh the roast you
did for bob saget that was just some of the funniest comedy i think i've ever
seen wow you're sweet saget's
a friend i like him say it's good but where was the roast on rachel i never saw
it it was i think
it was comedy central really so great if you could play a clip of it i don't
know if you can but like
i can't but chris hernandez can he was roasting the roast it was oh it's just
so funny ah all right
do you remember any of it norm yeah yeah what do you remember uh i did a roast
uh bob saget and uh
all right why do you have a clip of it no we will get one oh he said there was
a clip i i think we're
gonna go where were you going with this no i was just wondering if there's a
clip all right no no i
i can't serve just me just explaining it but i was supposed to be uh you know
these roasts you're
supposed to like insult people and be real dirty and stuff like that so um
instead of doing that i got
a book uh that my dad gave me when i was a little boy it was called like 101
insults to tell
people at a retirement party so i got all my jokes out of that you did huh yeah
and then i uh and none
of them were dirty at all they were like um i'm gonna give it one more shot how'd
you get the saturday
night live gig if you were such the you were the guy that was afraid and your
voice would rise how'd you
get the gig i don't know i just went to lauren uh they like me doing they like
my stand-up and then
they said come in and do two characters and uh two impressions and i said i don't
got nothing and that
was it uh yeah that was it i said i'll go on as a writer because i said i can't
i'm not going to the
audition because i don't know how to do characters or impressions here's what
we're going to do you know
i've said it before and i'll say to your face i love you you make me laugh like
crazy i will plug
where you're going you're going to be at cobs uh tonight eight eight and ten
fifteen saturday eight
and ten fifteen sunday eight o'clock don't be upset with me we're done okay
yeah okay thanks
i love you i like it next time we'll catch you next time okay 500 new business
cards that's 500 first
impressions at staples we know you