Name: Late River with River Guy (Conner O'Malley) The Only Talk Show in the River
Uploaded: 2018-09-12T15:21:32.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Late River with River Guy (Conner O'Malley) The Only Talk Show in the River' from Conner O'Malley on Comedy Buff. Published 2018-09-12. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Late River with River Guy (Conner O'Malley) The Only Talk Show in the River' from Conner O'Malley on Comedy Buff. Published 2018-09-12. Transcript available.

I'm the only fucking talk show host that's got his own fucking river!
It's me, your host Connor O'Malley.
This is a very exciting premiere of the river talk show.
It's the only late night talk show that happens entirely in the river.
And we're sponsored today by this large bridge.
I'd like to see Ed McMahon try to come at me with that shit.
Let's get to the news!
Indiana is the first state in the nation to make it mandatory to beat off
before you get into a full body scan machine at an airport.
They said that too much cum goes in the airport body scan machine.
And they can't.
People have been smuggling cum on airplanes.
The guys especially.
They won't beat off for about 2-3 weeks.
And it's like, hey guys, what the f-
Uh, oh my god.
We got some waves coming.
Whoa!
We got some waves coming.
Whoa!
We got some waves coming.
Whoa!
Donald Trump has appointed Rachel Dolezal to his special committee to find out
what the heck happened in, uh, in Rio for the Olympics with Ryan Lochte.
Not too many people know this, but Eric Trump is one of the few people in the
United States that can cum diarrhea.
Oh my god.
What the hell?
Dana on wardrobe!
Come on!
My tie's popping out, ha!
Oh, oh!
Matt Lowers in the news!
He's gonna start his own private island where all the other #MeToo guys can
just chill!
Chow!
Chow!
Chow!
House!
Rappi Chow!
Diki!
Do you love me?
I'm providing!
Can you love me to my child brother?
Rappi Chow!
Rappi Chow!
Rappi Chow!
Rappi Chow!
Rappi Chow!
Oh!
We gotta save retail!
Uh, I met my wife and REI.
We were both looking at the different wool socks.
And I said, excuse me, are you Christian?
And she said, yes!
And I said, excuse me, are you Christian?
And she said, yes!
And I said, I'm going to go to the next day.
And I also happen to be white.
I'm the type of guy that I only hang out with cousins.
Greg Kinnear!
Stay away from me!
Stay away from my family, Greg Kinnear!
I got a big fucking feud with Greg Kinnear.
He tried to bite my fucking head when I was at, uh...
They tried to steal my ideas.
I saw them working, uh, talking to the, uh, to the Ohio governor about doing a
river talk show in the fucking Ohio river!
I'm talking to you fucking Greg Kinnear!
I'm gonna beat your fucking ass, talk soup!
Don't you wish the river was hot like soup?
Don't you wish the river was hot like soup?
Don't you wish the river was hot like soup?
We're going in next week when our guests will be Aries Spears and Takeshi69.
And we'll have, uh, the musical group Orgy will perform their hit single Blue
Monday.
That's next week in the river talk show.
talk show.