Name: Government Applications | Stand Up Solutions Clip | Conner O'Malley
Uploaded: 2024-05-21T17:29:16.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Government Applications | Stand Up Solutions Clip | Conner O'Malley' from Conner O'Malley on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-05-21. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Government Applications | Stand Up Solutions Clip | Conner O'Malley' from Conner O'Malley on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-05-21. Transcript available.

And that's what the future of stand-up solutions is.
Government applications.
I got a question.
How many people here trust their elected officials?
Throw them out with the stinky cabbage, mate.
The elected officials, they get into power
and they just can't help themselves.
They get bribed and they take the bribes
and they can be corrupted, they can be gotten to.
They can be put on a private jet, flown to an island,
Epstein, all these things can happen to them.
They can be gotten to.
But AI can't be bribed.
A fully AI democracy.
Now we went ahead and did a test in Wisconsin.
This is Portage County in Wisconsin.
If you're running for president in the United States,
you're going to be spending a lot of time in Wisconsin.
If you're spending a lot of time in Wisconsin,
you're going to be spending a lot of time in Portage, Wisconsin.
This county specifically went for Obama,
then it went for Trump, then it went for Biden.
It can tip the whole state one way or the other.
It's an incredibly important county.
And we went there and we asked all the registered Republicans
and we asked all the registered Democrats,
can we have your 5G data?
And they said, yes!
We took their data.
Unrestricted, we took all their data.
Everything that they're saying on Discord,
everything that they're saying in the middle of the night
are really loud over Xbox Live anonymously.
You know, everything that you type into the text bubble
and then you say, actually, wait a minute,
before you send, you go, that's maybe too far.
I don't want that out there in the world.
And you delete it, we still get that.
Take all that information.
And we created fully avatar AI candidates
that can go on the news,
that can answer questions,
that can debate one another.
And they don't have to guess
what their constituencies wants them to do.
Because we have everybody's actual thoughts and feelings
directly in their private chats
and we put them directly into the AI's brain
so they don't ever have to guess.
We created a face and a name
based on what people like and their interests.
We created an AI Republican candidate
based on what people actually like
and what they look at most on the internet.
And the AI Republican candidate's name
is Yeti Bareback Breeding.
And the cool thing about this
is he doesn't have to guess, like,
what's the number one thing
that my constituency cares about?
He can just, we could just take
the number one thing that they care about
and put it directly into his brain.
And the number one thing
that registered Republicans care about,
what he's running on, his campaign promise,
is to get white actors back into commercials.
Now, we went ahead and did the exact same process
with the registered Democrats.
And we created a registered,
we created a Democratic candidate
and that candidate's name is Coxari.
And he's running on the campaign promise
of getting the West Wing back on television.
And the cool thing about this
is you don't have to vote.
You don't have to go to your polling place.
Just use your phone.
We take all of that information,
we tabulate it into a vote,
and a winner is declared by 5G.
It's incredible!