Name: Norm Podcast Interview
Uploaded: 2022-02-03T15:04:51.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Norm Podcast Interview' from TickleMeNorm on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-02-03. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Norm Podcast Interview' from TickleMeNorm on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-02-03. Transcript available.

Norm Podcast Interview

You are listening to a CGSW podcast. For more podcast initiatives, visit our
website at cgsw.com slash podcasts.
The following CGSW program, Am I Right?, contains foul language and mature
content. Listener discretion is advised.
Welcome, everybody, to this week's edition of the Am I Right podcast. It's the
Am I Right podcast, episode 5, and guess what?
It's the first Am I Right classic. Am I Right classic, yeah. It's the first
weekend that our slap-ass dick-nuts producers couldn't track down an interview.
I tried my best. I tracked one down. We just got canceled on. I was trying to
make it sound like we had people.
Forget it. Forget it. I was trying to make it sound like we had people. I just
want you to say who's on. I just want you to say who's on so that people can
get excited.
It's the Norm Macdonald interview. Norm Macdonald. It's hilarious.
It truly is a great place to start Am I Right classics.
But you know what I'm scared of? Tell me.
There's nowhere to go but down. Slightly. It's only a short drop in the Am I
Right pantheon.
Maybe next week we drop the Margaret Cho interview. I don't know.
Stay tuned for Norm Macdonald this week on the Am I Right podcast.
All right. So this is the first episode of Am I Right classics. Is this Am I
Right podcast five or should we call it like Am I Right classics one?
Am I Right classics one. And hopefully it's one of many few.
I know what you meant by many few.
Many few wasn't even correct.
But it makes sense. It makes sense.
But you know what it makes sense? It makes sense emotionally.
It makes sense emotionally. I knew what you were getting at.
We want to bring you new interviews.
We want to bring you new content.
We don't want to show you our years worth of awesome interviews.
Those are supposed to be just for me and Evan.
Exactly. These are for our archives.
So we're kind of like letting you in.
This is like we're Dick and these are Dick's picks.
This is like...
This is totally like the Grateful Dead. You're right.
This is like Jess's best.
Yeah.
Does that rhyme it up?
Can we call it that?
Yeah.
Jess's best volume one?
Yeah, but...
Plus seven?
There must be like a Wills one or something like that that would work.
Wills pills?
No, I don't care.
We can stick with Jess's best.
Plus seven.
Plus seven.
Jess's best plus Evan number one, Norm MacDonald.
There's actually a little bit of a backstory behind why we picked Norm MacDonald
today.
We were going to have Leahy on from Trailer Park Boys.
Or we were going to have some...
We don't need to see who we were going to have on.
Well, Leahy dropped out on us, but we'll get him soon.
Right.
See, we don't burn our bridges here.
We don't say, oh, this guy dropped us with a dick.
I don't think he's a dick.
You just call the producer, me.
Yeah.
A jerk.
You know, it's like things happen, you know.
What if he's got like diphtheria or something?
I don't know.
I think he was actually on the stage when we called.
Actually, I called the wrong number at one point and I let the phone ring and
ring and
ring and ring.
And then some lady picked up and said, I can't talk right now.
And you could hear someone at church in the background, which was actually
really nice.
Yeah.
So, see things happen.
Will makes a bad phone call.
People get sick.
That's cool.
We'll have him on whenever.
So, we tried plan B.
Plan B.
We've got Norm Macdonald's phone number.
We tried to give him a call.
And then...
And no answer.
No answer.
So, we thought, well, time is running out.
Yeah.
Like, so, here it is.
First MRA classic.
Norm Macdonald.
Yeah.
Or are you introducing it right now?
Or are you just saying kind of that's what we said to each other?
I'm not sure.
It could go either way.
Okay.
Well, so, should we just start the interview now?
Yeah.
Just hit play.
All right.
Awesome.
Here is Norm Macdonald.
Love you guys.
See you soon.
What's Twitter?
Come on, Evan.
Don't do this.
I won't do it.
Jesse, you go ahead.
You explain it.
Twitter is this internet thing where you just say about yourself every two
seconds.
So, like, Evan is annoying Norm.
It's like, okay.
Yeah, that's what mine says right now.
And then everyone would go, oh, cool.
Oh, so, it's a real time.
Do you, you know when, it's like, it's like if you, it's like a brain fart
receptacle.
So, if you think of something that you think is funny, you just, you just write
it and then people think you're an asshole.
It's kind of how it's worked for me.
Yeah, I'd say that's about right now.
Totally.
All right, so should, Norm, are you ready for the interview here?
Do you have like a time limit or anything like that that we should be aware of
or?
Nah, somebody's supposed to find me at some point, but.
I think that was us.
So, yeah, I guess we got you now, so.
Such idiots.
Yeah, sorry.
It's college radio.
Did they tell you it was college radio, Norm?
Where are you guys?
Calgary.
Oh, sweet, man.
I used to live in Calgary.
Really?
Yeah.
How long did you live here for?
What did you do?
Did you work?
Were you a rigger?
Were you a rig pig?
No, I was too scared to do anything.
I worked, I would go on the corner and trucks would come.
Hold on a minute.
Yeah.
Are we doing the interview right now?
We'll just, we'd like to welcome to the show.
Wait, wait, hold on a second.
What?
I gotta have to check this out.
What was a call?
Yeah, that's why you said hang on.
Oh, I don't know what he's talking about.
It's time for the next interview.
Great fucking job, Wills.
Norm's funny.
Did you know that?
Yeah, he was really funny.
What was he doing, Cal?
Yeah, I just waited for a truck.
Hey, Norm, how are you?
That was the guy that phoned me at the right time.
Do we need to reschedule this or anything like that?
Would that work?
No, no, no.
No?
Okay.
I already told him to phone me back.
Okay, so when's he going to phone you back just so we have an idea?
Like a half hour.
Half hour?
Oh, perfect.
That's cool.
Okay, thanks for doing this.
We appreciate it.
No problem.
Yeah, we're fuck-ups.
All right, so we'll start it for real now then, I guess.
Yeah, welcome to Am I Right, Norm MacDonald.
Hey, what's up?
What did you call it?
Am I Right?
Am I Right, yes.
That's a good name for a show.
Who came up with that?
I think it was me.
It wasn't you.
No, I think it was me.
It was me.
Let's just call it a team effort so we're not fighting in front of the company
again, Jesse.
Sorry.
So, yeah, you're talking to us.
It's Am I Right?
We're live out of Calgary, Alberta.
You were saying that you've lived in Calgary before?
Yeah, I was talking to you before.
Remember?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
We called an hour late.
That was us.
I remember.
It was like two seconds ago.
Yeah, I used to live there.
And then you asked me if I was a rigger.
And then I said I was always too afraid to do that.
Now, what I would do is I would go in the dead of winter and I would go in the
corners
and these trucks would come.
And then you would get work for the day by jumping in the truck.
And so it was just paid for jumping in the truck?
No, no.
You had to work all day with the guy.
Oh, okay.
And then he would make a lot of money and you would make a minimum wage.
So was that all like cash?
Did you have to pay taxes on that stuff or was that just...
It was all cash.
Oh, man.
That's awesome.
Well, yeah, it was.
But then you would spend it all that night, all the money.
And then you would have to go the next day.
But it was actually fun.
What kind of work do they have you doing?
Like just telling jokes at job sites and stuff like that?
No, it was mostly moving furniture.
Sometimes you get like construction or something like that.
But a lot of it was moving real awkward, heavy furniture around spiral staircases
and stuff.
That sounds like a moving gig.
I moved a lady once that had three grandfather clocks.
Like that's not right.
One time I worked with this old man.
He was a really tough guy.
And then he was the driver, you know.
And so we got to this place and there was this...
Every place we went to was like always hard to get stuff in.
And this one was like impossible.
So then I thought, oh, great.
We won't have to put it out.
And then he figured out this way to like go up a balcony.
So I put a ladder up to the balcony.
And he went up top of the balcony.
And we were moving this big fridge up.
And then he had it like on a rope and all that stuff.
So then we're going up.
Like I'm at the bottom.
I'm pushing it up.
And this old like 70-year-old, real tough old man.
He's at the top pulling on the rope.
And then I slipped off the ladder.
So I looked up, man.
And I'll never forget it.
And all his veins were coming.
He was holding the whole fridge.
And all his veins were coming out.
And his face was like all red.
He told me to give my head a shake afterwards.
Well, what could he expect?
It was minimum wage.
Exactly.
Some of those guys.
One time I were in this garbage truck.
And so I thought it could be kind of fun, you know, because I saw the guys on
the backs of garbage trucks.
It seems like kind of fun.
But the driver goes real fast.
Like you don't have that much time.
And then also people will leave anything in their garbage.
Like it'll just be like sod or something.
It'll weigh 200 pounds.
Or there'll be like a couch broken in half.
Or it was awful.
And then at the end, we'd have to go to the dump, which is like hell itself.
Just fire and rats.
What dump were you going to that was on fire, Norm?
Where is it?
I want to go, actually.
All dumps have fires gone.
Wow, this is news to me.
I wasn't aware of the dump fire problem here in Calgary.
Oh, man.
God, are you kidding?
You can go out there and shoot rats.
Could you get paid for it, though?
Is that something that they pick you up to do at Cash Corner?
No, you don't get paid to shoot the rats.
No, but you can go there after hours with a .22 and fire at rats.
I think it's legal.
So is that what's bringing you back then?
You're coming to Calgary next year.
I can't believe you guys don't know about that.
No, I mean, I'm just new to Calgary.
And this isn't something that's in the guide.
I'll take that when I go there, man.
We'll have a good old time at the dump.
Shooting rats.
Shooting rats and lighting fires.
Jesse, do you have a .22?
I'm in.
I'm totally in.
I'm not.
You know, the fire cooks the rats.
Just saying.
No, we're not going to do anything that crazy.
We'll just get a bottle of Cherry Jack and head down to the dump.
Wow, where do we take an interview from here?
We take it to the dump.
Yeah, yeah, exactly.
Well, I guess that's where our show usually ends up.
What, are you guys playing music?
No, am I right?
We're a comedy show.
Yeah.
You've never heard of us before this moment?
Are you on Twitter?
We are.
That's why everyone thinks we're assholes.
Well, you can't say that, man.
No, we can say that.
We're on late.
We're on late.
We're on late night.
This is Anything Goes.
Oh, really?
If there's anything like ribald you want to get out of the way, I mean, now is
the time.
Now is the time to do it.
Our listeners just fall over themselves to hear that kind of stuff.
Why?
What's the worst thing you can say?
The F word, probably.
Why did you say it like that?
Well, we're not allowed to say it, but our guests are allowed.
I gotcha.
Norm, you can get a little blue.
I mean, we've heard it before.
All right.
I will, man.
Don't do it right now, though.
Wait to, like, surprise us with it.
Okay.
Surprise us with it.
So, I mean, what can people expect, then, when you come to Calgary?
Is this going to be stand-up?
Are you going to be doing scat?
Are you going to be doing impressions?
Don't do what I like, you son of a bitch.
What?
Is that too early?
So, it's insult humor?
No, it's, uh, no, what am I going to do?
I don't know.
I just do, I kind of just talk, hammer on.
Sometimes it's remotely entertaining.
You're really selling the show, Norm.
Yeah, this is definitely worth the $60 ticket, Norm.
Thanks.
No, it'll be fun, man.
People will be laughing.
You bring, uh, what?
Hey, bring your lady friend.
Pick up a b