Name: norm on random show 3
Uploaded: 2022-03-24T05:00:10.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'norm on random show 3' from TickleMeNorm on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-03-24. Transcript available. Be Sad Now #normmacdonald #norm.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'norm on random show 3' from TickleMeNorm on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-03-24. Transcript available. Be Sad Now #normmacdonald #norm.

norm on random show 3

It's My Guys in the Desert, only on the Vegas Stats and Information Network,
Sirius 215 XM204.
Interact with the show by following us on Twitter or Facebook, at V-CINLIVE.
Time, folks, for a weekend update.
Guess who just came on in?
The legendary one himself, Mr. Norm MacDonald, who is stand-up comedy, is on
here at the South.
Norm, welcome. Welcome to V-CINLIVE, my friend.
It's a great honor to be here with you, sir.
And you're sitting next to one of the great bookmakers.
Yes, I know who he is.
Mr. Chris Hayden.
Another one over here, Vinnie, by you. My Guys in the Desert.
My Guys in the Desert. What was great when you were broadcasting is you would
say there's one for the desert.
That's right.
So you actually made it a little catchphrase, whereas Al Michaels will go, well,
that will be important to some people somewhere.
And you go, okay, whatever.
We understand.
I don't like to beat around the bush.
I'm a little bit like you in that regard.
Okay.
Now, you know, I'm sure a lot of, especially your fans, know that you're from
Canada.
And you've got, I see, the Canadian logo up there.
And you and your brother, were you both hockey players you played at when you
were growing up?
Everybody in Canada play hockey.
You know, we don't got no celebrities or none, just hockey players.
And so, you know, you reach a point where your coach tells you, you're just
going to be a regular guy.
You're just going to watch hockey from now on.
Your coach tells you to go to Vegas?
My coach tells me, yeah, bet on anything but hockey.
Chris, as you know, hockey can be, you being a Pittsburgh Penguin fan, seated
next year to the Canadian, and the Penguins win a huge, huge game this
afternoon against Washington.
Yeah, all the money's on Washington, too, which kind of surprised me.
Well, they knocked me.
Well, they joined the club, yeah.
You know, this year we had five Canadian teams make the playoffs, which was
incredible, but two remain.
By the way, I got booed by our crowd when I said the Penguins don't win the cup.
I'm rooting for one of the Canadian teams to win it.
Oh, that's nice.
They should have the cup up there.
Sure, sure.
And, you know, I like, I love the pens.
I mean, you know, how could you go to Washington?
What kind of commie are you that you're going to go to Washington against
Pittsburgh?
No, no.
My Lord.
It's like 1972 all over again.
You know, Norm, when you come in, I just had to think back to the days of
Saturday Night Live.
My son, when he heard you were coming on last night, he said, Dad, he said,
that weekend update hasn't been the same.
Without Norm giving it.
That's very true of you to say, but.
But now that you say it.
I would say this.
The ESPYs have never been the same either.
That's one of the highlights of my Norm Macdonald memories.
You know, when I did the ESPYs, what I didn't realize, most of the crowd liked
me, because, you know, most of the crowd are just local New Yorkers.
About 95%, and then the 5% on the front are all the athletes.
So the crowd liked me.
But what I didn't understand was behind me, as I did the jokes on the screen,
were just, you know, pictures of a scowling Ken Griffey Jr.
Not the old man.
I saw that.
You know, with comedy, as Norm certainly, there's such a fine line, the sensitivities
that are involved.
But I have to tell you, I have to tell you, I happen to be watching, and you
came on with a weekend update, and it was after the conclusion of the O.J.
And when you came on, well, it's officially legal, murder is legal in the state
of California, I'm on the floor, okay?
Now, I know there was one executive at NBC who wasn't, because to this day, he
still doesn't think O.J. was guilty.
No, he's buddies with O.J.
But I have to tell you.
And listen, maybe I'm a rusher to judgment.
Just as O.J. was the greatest rusher, maybe I'm the greatest rusher to judgment.
Could be.
It could be.
But you know the timing of things.
It's just so critical with you up on, you know, I could never do it, because I
could never pull off the timing.
I used to love George Carlin.
And whenever I could, I would go and watch him.
And normally, he was fantastic.
But on this one night in Las Vegas, he was less than fantastic, okay?
He was trying, he was trying new material.
And it just was not going over well.
He didn't have great respect for Las Vegas audiences, either.
No, no, not at all.
Oh, he abused us throughout the night, okay?
He had a lot of respect for the race and sports book, though.
Is that right?
Well, he would come down and see us.
And he'd have his little puppy with him.
He'd come down and he'd have his, so, you know, he came to the counter one time
and the writer said,
Oh, you probably want to bet all the dogs.
He looked at him and said, give me the, he went down through every favorite and
he just went down.
He said, no, then I want to go, all right, now I want to go and bet the greyhounds.
I'm like, okay, all right, you can do that, too, if you want.
But he, he came when he was performing there.
He, he came by the book.
Whenever I bet the greyhounds, I'll always bet, I'll always bet a dog.
I don't know if that makes sense.
Good norm, perfect.
But, um, Mr. Musburger.
Yes, sir.
People that you've worked with, and now, if you're in, now listen, you were,
you were on
TV for years with a guy called the, do you mean the Greek?
Do you mean the Greek?
And, which I always found odd that he was thrown out for racism.
Everybody called him the Greek.
But, uh, here you are, you had a bookmaker on the program.
I did.
Which I found fascinating.
But, uh, were there a lot of guys in sportscasting that, uh, developed gambling,
uh, problems?
Or not problems, it's fun.
You mean, yeah, exactly.
By the way, he's got another Greek bookmaker sitting right next to him.
There we go.
I was about to say, I've got a great number.
He has not changed a bit in that regard, so.
You know, Norm, it was fascinating, because I'm going to be perfectly honest, I
knew next
to nothing.
I mean, I knew you could bet on games and on point spreads, and Bob Martin was
a legend.
But the Greek would always take me over to the Barbary Coast, and Michael Gunn,
who owns
the South Point, he was operating the Barbary over there.
Sure, good stake, good stake.
Best.
Yeah.
You know, he moved Michaels from Barbary down, right down here to the, uh, to
the South Point,
as, as you know.
So I said to the Greek, I said, Greek, what do you like going over to the Barbary?
I called him the Greek.
Hey, Greek.
You know?
It's unbelievable.
He'd be sitting around.
Greek, come on, let's go out here for dinner.
Greek, you have to go, you're racist.
I never really saw that.
I'm as racist, Greek, they're in.
When you think about it, he's absolutely, what do you like going to the Barbary
Coast for?
Hey.
Parlay cards.
Ties win.
Ties win.
That was, that was why the Greek would go to the Barbary Coast, because you
were the
only guys that had ties winning.
That's a big, big, big thing.
He knew value.
He knew value.
That's a lot of EV on the ties win.
Yeah, we still run that ties win card, and I got to make it every week, and I
got to tell
you, I hate that thing.
They do not.
They don't put.
First degree doesn't like it.
No.
I remember they lost money for a while on those 10-point three-team parlays.
I don't know if they do those anymore.
We don't do those anymore.
We got wised up on that.
You know where I thought I'd make all my money was they had a bet.
I know a lot about golf.
That's a sport I know more than the public about.
So I figured, ah, you know.
So when Tiger was at his peak, they actually had to bet Tiger against anyone,
everyone.
So, you know, you'd get 150 guys if you took, and it was one to two it would
pay.
So I said, well, this looks like, you know, it would be a sucker bet to bet on
Tiger, you
know, when you get, it's nice to have 150 golfers at the start of the
tournament, but
I'd lose every time.
We talked about that.
We had a heck of a run with Tiger, winning every one of these tournaments.
Usually we're rooting for you, though.
Yeah.
The world would be on Tiger.
All right.
Guys, sit right here.
We've got to pay some bills.
I'm going to be right back.
And this is for Norm.
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We're back live in just a moment.
It's My Guys in the Desert, only on the Vegas Stats and Information Network,
Sirius 215-XM-204.
Interact with the show by following us on Twitter or Facebook at V-CIN Live.
My Guys in the Desert, Chris Andrews, Vinnie Marialo, and it's a pleasure for
us to be joined by Colonel Sanders.
Norm MacDonald in the house, ladies and gentlemen.
So how are you doing moving that fried chicken?
I'm not doing it no more.
They replaced me with Rob Lowe.
They replaced you?
I thought you were interchanging.
Yeah, that's what they did.
They had one guy.
They didn't like him.
Then they got me.
And then they got a little bit of press in the advertising world.
In like advertising weekly that they changed the kernel.
So they go, we'll keep doing it.
And I go, no, please.
Because I was one of those gigs where it's just free money.
That's the only one I got.
You know, you get to wear a costume.
And all the free chicken, probably.
I ate a lot of chicken.
Norm, the show tonight over here at the showroom.
And it's also tomorrow night, too.
We've got two nights left.
Tonight and tomorrow.
And what time do you say you're going to start?
At 7.30.
That's why I told my wife we can't go Saturday night because it's going to run
into the Penguin game.
If they go overtime, what am I going to do?
I've got to sniff Norm or the Penguin.
No, you've got to go tomorrow night.
That's why we're going tomorrow night.
I think the wife wanted to go out on Saturday night.
It's not going to happen.
You check the game schedule, then you check everything else.
We have our priorities, Vinny.
We've been here a long time.
That's right.
See, we go.
I see a Mets game, you know.
It reminds me of the worst beat I ever took.
Maybe you remember this game.
I don't know how the regular book handled it.
But I know how the bookies did.
I bet on the New York Mets.
And Robin Ventura hit a grand slam.
The grand slam single?
The grand slam single.
I do.
In the playoffs.
They tackled him in second base.
That's right.
I remember that game very well.
And I remember Bob Costa said, oh, they're not going to count those runs.
And later I asked him, why did you mention that?
And he was like, oh, yeah.
He said my father gambled a lot.
Did you lay the one and a half?
No, no.
I had the over.
He had the over.
Yeah, so it was the only way.
You know, the outfielders were standing at second base.
Like there was very little chance there was going to be a home run.
And it was just this line drive over there.
So for folks listening, he hit the home run over the right field wall.
And then he just, he did touch first base.
And then he just stopped.
Oh, he didn't stop.
They mobbed him.
He got tackled.
Which is odd becau