Name: Theo's FIrst Call Into the Hotline
Uploaded: 2018-06-22T18:00:07.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Theo's FIrst Call Into the Hotline' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2018-06-22. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Theo's FIrst Call Into the Hotline' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2018-06-22. Transcript available.

we got a new number now if you want to call in we got a google voice number um
let's get to some
of those advice questions right now how about that here we have one of them
right here this
is from gabriel hey mr fio vaughn my name is gabriel uh big fan of the podcast
been listening
to everyone but uh but i can't i think i listen to all but uh just saw your
post on instagram and
uh i got a question for you uh you ever had a hamster go south on you like uh
through all your
years it sounds like you're pretty uh you have an expertise in handling hamsters
they seem like
fuzzy furry animals and that's why people want to buy them but you ever have a
hamster go ballistic
on you like an h go b you know shit goes south you ever know what's gonna
happen if you got a story
about it i'd love to hear it but anyways even if i don't hear about it i'll
still be listening my
name is gabriel just moved to la from hawaii and uh yeah man keep up the good
work huh i'll uh
i'll be listening man yep good one okay all right gabriel um have you ever had
a hamster that went
that went crazy yeah uh some of you guys know or don't know that i grew up in a
hamster breeding
area um used to work at this place bertram's one of my first jobs they would
sell hamsters and
ground game you know small i mean some people pushed it as exotic meats it was
pets it was everything
you know bait um you know just small animals guineas hamps um g-pigs rats mice
nutria
um and i remember now one thing if you don't know this about hamsters hamsters
will
if the a lot of times birthing makes the mothers very nervous
and they will uh it's kind of a bummer to say but they'll eat their young they
will
get rid of their young i mean they're basically they're the casey anthony of
of uh of small ground game and
this um one time we had we had a hamster that
you know had some children this lady this lady hamster
had some children um knocked off her own children you know just straight up got
super italian on
them and then started uh killing other hamsters children and that i'd never
seen before
and they had a dude that worked at the hamster place who was like i'm gonna
take care of them
um and i thought you know he'd poison them or something but he he took them and
shot them in the
head dude uh you know and i hate to say that you know i've had some issues with
animals i accidentally
you know uh killed that deer with that lawnmower when i was working on a on a
soybean and cotton farm
um and that's still haunts me man still haunts me dude if you have not been
through i mean we've
all got our own little vietnams and that was one for me man just driving this
you know six eight foot
grass and oh and you just you hear that you hear bambi go bambi go down bambi
go down um but anyway
yeah this hamster got rogue and it was just killing local hamster children and
this dude i thought he
poisoned it or something but then what who goes and shoots a hamster in the
head bro you know i'm saying
this dude is straight up i mean that's that's intense man that's really really
intense you know
uh i feel like that's like i don't even know what that is that's unnecessary
for sure
you know do something poison it do something but but yeah this guy took it
outside and shot it so i
guess gabriel that would be your answer man um that's one of the only times i
had a hamster go b on me
i had a h go b but i mean they'll bite you well the and the hamsters were
getting out a days gabriel i
can't even tell you if they're safe or not because a lot of these hamsters uh
they're from russia
um if you look at them they're angry they're small they're meek they look like
premature babies
um they're red-eyed red-handed just already look real real scattered like they're
alcoholics or
you know maybe in cocaine anonymous meetings they look like hamsters you would
meet in a place like
that so i'm i am concerned about the you know the the ground game that that's
currently coming through
america because a lot of that market went abroad a lot of that market went to russia
so who knows maybe
trump will bring some of that abroad back uh back to the u.s we'll see thank
you guys for checking out
this clip and if you want to see another clip then you can look at this clip or
this clip either one of
these so did you pick one or are you still just watching me do this because
this is alarming