Name: Theo Von's Joe Rogan Experience
Uploaded: 2018-12-08T17:00:09.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Theo Von's Joe Rogan Experience' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2018-12-08. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Theo Von's Joe Rogan Experience' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2018-12-08. Transcript available.

what's going on a lot of stuff is going on you know we had you know i got to go
on joe rogan
this week we we went on joe rogan and joe rogan's um you know it's i was
nervous first of all you
know i was nervous because i look up to joe so much you know and for some
reason with me i think
when i look up to somebody it for some reason it makes me kind of nervous um
you know i guess well
you want to i don't know it's like when you're hanging out you know what it
feels like to me a
little bit it's like you're hanging out with your big brother and his friends
and you're like you
wanna you know you're just i don't know i was just nervous um but it was it was
wild man and right off
the bat joe joe starts talking to me and i love joe you know i'm extremely
grateful to him um
you know he's done a lot of nice things small things that were really nice for
me like out of uh
like he would just see me do comedy and i've said this before but he would just
drop me a text a
couple days later the next day and just say hey man you had a really good set
you know and uh
and that kind of stuff like you don't realize sometimes like somebody that you
admire like
you know telling you something pop sharing something positive supporting what
you do you
don't realize how much that means to that person and he doesn't you know i don't
think he
you know he doesn't probably realize it but it's like i would get those texts
and i'm like wow man
you know it's like your big bro it's like i don't know it's just like you're
all it's like
impressing your brother impressing i don't know you know and that kind of stuff
really just res has
resonated with me over the years he's done that and joey diaz does that as well
he'll call you
but but joe would do that sometimes and just hit me up and say hey man you were
really funny last
night and you know coming from you know my life and all i wanted to do probably
was you know make
um make people i admired you know make them feel like or make them feel like i
was part of
like i was okay you know and maybe something that goes back to like father and
brother you know not
being present growing up and all of that but you know just when you have a you
know when you have a
male figure and you know just that support support that's really what it is uh
joe's been so supportive
and so you know anyway but i you know i was excited to be in there and i was
excited to get to hang out
with him because he thinks like wild you know he's like he thinks like he's got
you know it's like i
don't i think he has more than one brain in his head you know joe rogan might
have five or six brains
in there and one of the brains is probably a rat you know and then he's but he
might have other brains
orbiting around brains you know he might have one brains that's uh you know he
might have brains in the
distance you know cooking elk i mean he's got you know he just he continues to
kind of like expand his
way of thinking and so right in the beginning he was talking about infinite and
infinite uh if there were
infinite universes and if there were more than just one of you and i i couldn't
even i was so nervous
kind of like i was just couldn't even think really that good and but then now i'm
thinking after that
i texted him the next day and i was like man i i'm obsessed now with wondering
if there are infinite
universes so many so this is what he was saying is so many infinite universes
that if you there would be a
possibility for you to meet your exact self like you know say the two universes
get close enough to each
other somehow in orbits or whatever and then you you know there's you know
programs you're both
astronauts or something you meet like if you were able to meet your exact self
think about that if you
were able to meet your exact self and i was just like i left there thinking
would i like myself
like if i had to if like if i met me
like would i like me
what would i do what would i think what i think i was neat
you know what i think i was tall would i think that i was handsome
you know what i think that i i mean would i know
if i were able to look into my own eyes would i be able to like see my truth
set like another
like another dimension
you know especially since most of my life you know especially growing up like i
didn't have any
a lot of self-worth so i was most of my self-worth would come from what other
people thought of me
you know there was no
you know
the there was nothing inside
of me so everything that i knew i had to get from the outside
and so i was so hyper aware of what other people were constantly thinking
because i needed to be because i needed that next second and that next minute
and that next
you know just to know i need i was monitoring
how i was and if i was okay through
moment to moment interaction with others
and what they would give me back that's how i feel about myself
i was thinking like if if i based my feelings off of what other people thought
of me
and i saw myself
would i then like looking into my own eyes would i be able to
you know just come full circle with
with what self-worth means
and what it
you know and and just like get to another
plateau and thinking about that
but it just fascinated me
i left out of there thinking like what the fuck
i never thought about running into myself
would i think i had bad breath
you know what i think i had like a long neck or a regular neck or a
you know a kind of a you know
a four out of ten kind of a mid-range lower
you know lower mid-range neck medium rare
because i've all you know i've had you know i don't have a super long neck
and i don't think a lot of people in my family we're not real look arounders
some people have a long neck
you know when you see those people they're looking for stuff
and they can you know look behind the sofa easier
and they don't lose their wallet probably as much
because they you know they got that extra two inches
to look and to gaze
you know they could see fruit easier if they're reaching if they're looking for
fruits
but when you have that limited neck
man you kind of you know
you're stuck on your own little bitty
you know it's not really a hilltop
you just kind of stuck on
you know you kind of just hanging out on your own cliff side
you can't do a lot when you got that limited
kind of that limited neck
and i come from a long line of people's limited necks
but yeah i was just wondering if you saw yourself
and you looked in your own eyes
would you
i don't know what we
i mean would your just whole world explode
like would you just know everything
would i like myself
what i like
it just blew my mind
if there were infinite universes
and
it just blew my mind man
so i left out of there i think with a little bit more thinking
you know and i think that that's kind of what joe rogan does for me
is he makes me think a little bit more
and he makes me think sometimes uncomfortable things
you know he makes me think outside of like
the confines of the comfortable confines of things
that you know these
these templates that i was raised in
or raised around or just that i saw
you know it's kind of like when you see
remember when you got that
you got them colors when you were a child
and your mother took you to the color shop
and you got that eight box
you got that box of eight hitters
you know that
you know just that little fucking
that roy gbiff fiasco
you know you got that little eight pack
that eight ball
you know you got that eight ball
and
suddenly
some dude shows up with that
six to four box
and your fucking
dick blew out of your ears
remember that
dude i remember my nuts
traveled up my body
and looked out of my eye holes
because i was just
i was just shook
by the fact that some man
suddenly had
uh
uh
56 more colors than i had
some boy i mean not a man
they didn't have any men in our class
you know in disguise or anything
but that some boy
and it blew my mind
and suddenly
you were doing different pictures
and you were thinking different things
and you
you were like
fuck magenta
i'm out here on magenta
and then
and then
and then everything changed
because then i would see a
you know
maybe i would see a
somebody's shirt or hat
or a
you know i would see a woman's hat
at church
and be like
oh that's a magenta hat
and suddenly
you know
you have more elements
to put out into your template
to put out into your world
and that's kind of i think
you know
that's kind of what i left out of joe rogan's podcast thinking
i left out of there actually just thinking
you know
he makes me think
and i think he makes a lot of
you know
young men and women think
you know
he's kind of this dope ass
outer space male
you know marine
uh
kind of not
he's just everything
i don't know what he is man
it's almost like
if you took a whole timeline of existence
and just
took it like that
and put it all
into one person
it's like the past
and
you know
and the future
and everything
and he's probably got moons
i bet dude
i bet he has moons going around him
i bet there's a moon
way off in the distance
that we don't even know about
that's just that
you know
just that rogan
that rogan moon
but it was an honor man
it's an honor to go in there
you know
it's just an honor
you know
like
uh
i don't know
it may
and it made me feel
you know
i just felt like accepted
you know
like he made me feel accepted
which uh
for me is like a really big thing
you know
like um
you know
like i think a lot of my life
i don't feel that way
um
and so
to go in
and
and i don't
i don't even think
these are things that he's
you know
outwardly doing
like on purpose
i think some of it's just his nature
uh
you know
i think in some ways
he's like a little bit of like
that big brother
that like
you know
you know
i had my brother
but my brother
you know
didn't live with us
and like
you know
and he
you know
and he's had some
you know
he's had some tough times
even though i
you know
i really love my brother
and i'm
you know
i don't think i've ever been prouder
of anybody in my whole life
than him
but uh
anyway
damn boy
this shit got me
gleeking out my eyeballs
dude
you know
what i'm saying
i'm fucking making salt water
dude
i'm a damn
i'm like a sixth grade
science experiment
dude
but
yeah
i don't know
he just made me feel accepted
and just you know
i don't know
but i'm just grateful man
you know
i'm just grateful to be
in an environment
where i feel inspired
you know
i get to go on some of these
other podcasts
fighter and the kid
and those guys make me laugh man
you know
and they make you laugh
i know it
because i get out on the road
and i see these
you know
i see a fighter and the kid listeners
and i'm a fighter and the kid listeners
so i know it's like
there's just this wild
we're part of their party
you know
we're part of their party
and i guess
um
i'm just grateful to just be
you know
just
just to i guess
i don't know
i'm just grateful i guess
to feel accepted some
and maybe you know
that shouldn't
matter to me
and i don't
i don't know if it matters
it's not a thing like it
like i walk around thinking
like those guys didn't accept me ever
but
i don't know
i just
and it's
it's just something that i feel
so
anyway man
i mean there was a lot more
to spending time over at rogan's
and you know
the conversation was kind of all over
and he thinks it's so fast
and it's hard for me to
you know
he's got that
he's got lance armstrong
in his blood
so that dude's out there
he's in outer space
he's walking on the moon
you know
he's juggling
he's playing sax
i mean he's got all kinds of things
going on inside of him
and
um
uh
but it was fun man
it was exciting
and it was fun
and
so if you wonder what it's like
to kind of go in
because i get a lot of messages
like theo what's it like to go to
joe rogan's
and
you know
is it like a
is it underground
somebody asked me
if it's underground
like it's a bunker
uh
and that made me laugh
so hard man
um
no actually
it's in a blimp
it is uh
we leave the earth
and we go out there
and eddie bravo's the driver
and
we
just travel around
and so that way
you get a first hand look
at some of the things
that um
you know
some of the
you know
some of the things
that joe is talking about
but
yeah man
i just had a blast
and i know that
a lot of
you know
people that are
you know
fans of mine
and friends of mine
and just
being able to listen
to me
talk to somebody
that we all
uh
admire
like joe
um
i just know
it was fun
for a lot of us
uh
so i was just glad
to be
i was just glad
to be there
wow you know
what's crazy
is my sister
can't even
read
but what does it
have to do
with us right now
hope you enjoyed
that video
and you can watch
another
and you can watch
this one
you can watch
this one
different options
different choices
some guy just
brings you one option
not this guy
two options
watch one
this one
or this one

Theo Von's Joe Rogan Experience

what's going on a lot of stuff is going on you know we had you know i got to go
on joe rogan
this week we we went on joe rogan and joe rogan's um you know it's i was
nervous first of all you
know i was nervous because i look up to joe so much you know and for some
reason with me i think
when i look up to somebody it for some reason it makes me kind of nervous um
you know i guess well
you want to i don't know it's like when you're hanging out you know what it
feels like to me a
little bit it's like you're hanging out with your big brother and his friends
and you're like you
wanna you know you're just i don't know i was just nervous um but it was it was
wild man and right off
the bat joe joe starts talking to me and i love joe you know i'm extremely
grateful to him um
you know he's done a lot of nice things small things that were really nice for
me like out of uh
like he would just see me do comedy and i've said this before but he would just
drop me a text a
couple days later the next day and just say hey man you had a really good set
you know and uh
and that kind of stuff like you don't realize sometimes like somebody that you
admire like
you know telling you something pop sharing something positive supporting what
you do you
don't realize how much that means to that person and he doesn't you know i don't
think he
you know he doesn't probably realize it but it's like i would get those texts
and i'm like wow man
you know it's like your big bro it's like i don't know it's just like you're
all it's like
impressing your brother impressing i don't know you know and that kind of stuff
really just res has
resonated with me over the years he's done that and joey diaz does that as well
he'll call you
but but joe would do that sometimes and just hit me up and say hey man you were
really funny last
night and you know coming from you know my life and all i wanted to do probably
was you know make
um make people i admired you know make them feel like or make them feel like i
was part of
like i was okay you know and maybe something that goes back to like father and
brother you know not
being present growing up and all of that but you know just when you have a you
know when you have a
male figure and you know just that support support that's really what it is uh
joe's been so supportive
and so you know anyway but i you know i was excited to be in there and i was
excited to get to hang out
with him because he thinks like wild you know he's like he thinks like he's got
you know it's like i
don't i think he has more than one brain in his head you know joe rogan might
have five or six brains
in there and one of the brains is probably a rat you know and then he's but he
might have other brains
orbiting around brains you know he might have one brains that's uh you know he
might have brains in the
distance you know cooking elk i mean he's got you know he just he continues to
kind of like expand his
way of thinking and so right in the beginning he was talking about infinite and
infinite uh if there were
infinite universes and if there were more than just one of you and i i couldn't
even i was so nervous
kind of like i was just couldn't even think really that good and but then now i'm
thinking after that
i texted him the next day and i was like man i i'm obsessed now with wondering
if there are infinite
universes so many so this is what he was saying is so many infinite universes
that if you there would be a
possibility for you to meet your exact self like you know say the two universes
get close enough to each
other somehow in orbits or whatever and then you you know there's you know
programs you're both
astronauts or something you meet like if you were able to meet your exact self
think about that if you
were able to meet your exact self and i was just like i left there thinking
would i like myself
like if i had to if like if i met me
like would i like me
what would i do what would i think what i think i was neat
you know what i think i was tall would i think that i was handsome
you know what i think that i i mean would i know
if i were able to look into my own eyes would i be able to like see my truth
set like another
like another dimension
you know especially since most of my life you know especially growing up like i
didn't have any
a lot of self-worth so i was most of my self-worth would come from what other
people thought of me
you know there was no
you know
the there was nothing inside
of me so everything that i knew i had to get from the outside
and so i was so hyper aware of what other people were constantly thinking
because i needed to be because i needed that next second and that next minute
and that next
you know just to know i need i was monitoring
how i was and if i was okay through
moment to moment interaction with others
and what they would give me back that's how i feel about myself
i was thinking like if if i based my feelings off of what other people thought
of me
and i saw myself
would i then like looking into my own eyes would i be able to
you know just come full circle with
with what self-worth means
and what it
you know and and just like get to another
plateau and thinking about that
but it just fascinated me
i left out of there thinking like what the fuck
i never thought about running into myself
would i think i had bad breath
you know what i think i had like a long neck or a regular neck or a
you know a kind of a you know
a four out of ten kind of a mid-range lower
you know lower mid-range neck medium rare
because i've all you know i've had you know i don't have a super long neck
and i don't think a lot of people in my family we're not real look arounders
some people have a long neck
you know when you see those people they're looking for stuff
and they can you know look behind the sofa easier
and they don't lose their wallet probably as much
because they you know they got that extra two inches
to look and to gaze
you know they could see fruit easier if they're reaching if they're looking for
fruits
but when you have that limited neck
man you kind of you know
you're stuck on your own little bitty
you know it's not really a hilltop
you just kind of stuck on
you know you kind of just hanging out on your own cliff side
you can't do a lot when you got that limited
kind of that limited neck
and i come from a long line of people's limited necks
but yeah i was just wondering if you saw yourself
and you looked in your own eyes
would you
i don't know what we
i mean would your just whole world explode
like would you just know everything
would i like myself
what i like
it just blew my mind
if there were infinite universes
and
it just blew my mind man
so i left out of there i think with a little bit more thinking
you know and i think that that's kind of what joe rogan does for me
is he makes me think a little bit more
and he makes me think sometimes uncomfortable things
you know he makes me think outside of like
the confines of the comfortable confines of things
that you know these
these templates that i was raised in
or raised around or just that i saw
you know it's kind of like when you see
remember when you got that
you got them colors when you were a child
and your mother took you to the color shop
and you got that eight box
you got that box of eight hitters
you know that
you know just that little fucking
that roy gbiff fiasco
you know you got that little eight pack
that eight ball
you know you got that eight ball
and
suddenly
some dude shows up with that
six to four box
and your fucking
dick blew out of your ears
remember that
dude i remember my nuts
traveled up my body
and looked out of my eye holes
because i was just
i was just shook
by the fact that some man
suddenly had
uh
uh
56 more colors than i had
some boy i mean not a man
they didn't have any men in our class
you know in disguise or anything
but that some boy
and it blew my mind
and suddenly
you were doing different pictures
and you were thinking different things
and you
you were like
fuck magenta
i'm out here on magenta
and then
and then
and then everything changed
because then i would see a
you know
maybe i would see a
somebody's shirt or hat
or a
you know i would see a woman's hat
at church
and be like
oh that's a magenta hat
and suddenly
you know
you have more elements
to put out into your template
to put out into your world
and that's kind of i think
you know
that's kind of what i left out of joe rogan's podcast thinking
i left out of there actually just thinking
you know
he makes me think
and i think he makes a lot of
you know
young men and women think
you know
he's kind of this dope ass
outer space male
you know marine
uh
kind of not
he's just everything
i don't know what he is man
it's almost like
if you took a whole timeline of existence
and just
took it like that
and put it all
into one person
it's like the past
and
you know
and the future
and everything
and he's probably got moons
i bet dude
i bet he has moons going around him
i bet there's a moon
way off in the distance
that we don't even know about
that's just that
you know
just that rogan
that rogan moon
but it was an honor man
it's an honor to go in there
you know
it's just an honor
you know
like
uh
i don't know
it may
and it made me feel
you know
i just felt like accepted
you know
like he made me feel accepted
which uh
for me is like a really big thing
you know
like um
you know
like i think a lot of my life
i don't feel that way
um
and so
to go in
and
and i don't
i don't even think
these are things that he's
you know
outwardly doing
like on purpose
i think some of it's just his nature
uh
you know
i think in some ways
he's like a little bit of like
that big brother
that like
you know
you know
i had my brother
but my brother
you know
didn't live with us
and like
you know
and he
you know
and he's had some
you know
he's had some tough times
even though i
you know
i really love my brother
and i'm
you know
i don't think i've ever been prouder
of anybody in my whole life
than him
but uh
anyway
damn boy
this shit got me
gleeking out my eyeballs
dude
you know
what i'm saying
i'm fucking making salt water
dude
i'm a damn
i'm like a sixth grade
science experiment
dude
but
yeah
i don't know
he just made me feel accepted
and just you know
i don't know
but i'm just grateful man
you know
i'm just grateful to be
in an environment
where i feel inspired
you know
i get to go on some of these
other podcasts
fighter and the kid
and those guys make me laugh man
you know
and they make you laugh
i know it
because i get out on the road
and i see these
you know
i see a fighter and the kid listeners
and i'm a fighter and the kid listeners
so i know it's like
there's just this wild
we're part of their party
you know
we're part of their party
and i guess
um
i'm just grateful to just be
you know
just
just to i guess
i don't know
i'm just grateful i guess
to feel accepted some
and maybe you know
that shouldn't
matter to me
and i don't
i don't know if it matters
it's not a thing like it
like i walk around thinking
like those guys didn't accept me ever
but
i don't know
i just
and it's
it's just something that i feel
so
anyway man
i mean there was a lot more
to spending time over at rogan's
and you know
the conversation was kind of all over
and he thinks it's so fast
and it's hard for me to
you know
he's got that
he's got lance armstrong
in his blood
so that dude's out there
he's in outer space
he's walking on the moon
you know
he's juggling
he's playing sax
i mean he's got all kinds of things
going on inside of him
and
um
uh
but it was fun man
it was exciting
and it was fun
and
so if you wonder what it's like
to kind of go in
because i get a lot of messages
like theo what's it like to go to
joe rogan's
and
you know
is it like a
is it underground
somebody asked me
if it's underground
like it's a bunker
uh
and that made me laugh
so hard man
um
no actually
it's in a blimp
it is uh
we leave the earth
and we go out there
and eddie bravo's the driver
and
we
just travel around
and so that way