Name: Theo Von & Bobby Lee Act Out Execution Scene
Uploaded: 2020-02-26T17:00:12.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Theo Von & Bobby Lee Act Out Execution Scene' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-02-26. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Theo Von & Bobby Lee Act Out Execution Scene' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-02-26. Transcript available.

you you were one of those trustworthy whites yeah even when i first met you not
you not so much
but when i met you i was like this guy this guy would never hang me yeah yeah
even if yeah because
you're like sneak out there at night and give you water oh you're like a schindler
yeah while you
were hanging right the day before they were gonna hang you what the day before
they were gonna hang
you i'd sneak out there that night and give you water but what if i said hey
hey hey can you get
me out of here i would say i can't why because they're they're gonna know they're
gonna know and
i'll die too okay but i'm gonna die yeah i know you are buddy and then that is
that comforting it
doesn't feel good let it keep going you haven't fucking let the scene play out
okay i know you're
gonna let's start from the top okay okay hold on hold on yeah so it's nighttime
right right and it's
raining what year is it i have to know what year it is it's whenever you guys
died dude 1670 all right
okay let's just say 1967 and your shoulder were jacked alabama alabama we're
fucking hanging
asians in alabama where this is san francisco wasn't it where they killed a lot
of asian people
wasn't that where they no well you know that was in the four in the 40s during
world war ii
um they had internment camps yeah but they didn't hang the japanese they just
put them in camps okay
then this was in china where they did this china they where was that there was
a ton of remember
they would hang them by their by their hair yeah yeah where was that at i read
a couple books about
this when i was young you don't remember okay so let's just pretend let's just
pretend it's alabama
okay it's in the 60s because you're a white dude you're southern right okay
yeah so i'm in a cage
yeah yeah yeah we're okay free but you know i'm in a cage i'm about to die the
next day okay
you're gonna let me roam free like i'm cow you're in a one of those things
these things
oh i'm in a um stockard what do you call those though a guillotine no guillotine
is a knife on it
the stocks is the stocks my bad no no i'm not medieval my bad yeah i'm in a
stock you're in the
stocks and so i'm gonna let me let me get let me have the first line though
okay it's raining
thanks for the water even though it's raining oh yeah i didn't know it was
gonna be raining
yeah but thanks i was parched no worries choppy chop what'd you call me nothing
guy okay i'm just
making sure you're okay i'm fine yeah but um i think they're gonna um i think
they're gonna do
something tomorrow like hang me or something i don't think hang you it's like a
surprise party i think
oh it is yeah it's not my birthday or nothing yeah but it's like a big day for
you it is yeah
is it is it one of my i have a feeling it's gonna be one of my last days oh it
depends on how you look
at it like that that's why i'm actually here right now to talk to you about jesus
christ
uh yeah no thanks oh come on guy good guy no thanks uh look guy but listen um
can i just say guy um
yeah what's your name again my name is reggie can i call you master reggie then
i mean you can master reggie um yeah just don't say it too loud okay can you
sneak me out of here
i'm gonna see what i can do um i can probably come back tomorrow night and help
you tonight i can
just give you water and also have this small bag of fresh pears oh i love pears
thank you i know
you do can you slice them because i have my hands i can't yeah i'll slice them
okay um but if they're
gonna hang me tomorrow then what's tomorrow night gonna what is that gonna do
yeah that's a good
point actually gonna be a little late can you say something inspirational to me
to make me feel
calm yeah comfort me i'm gonna tell you this that even though a lot of the
books and stuff just show
that god just you know has like a lot of white people in heaven that everybody's
allowed in heaven
and that you're gonna be up there and that you're gonna be a king will i will i
be able to go in the
white sections of heaven you can stop by you know yeah yeah but also there's
some black is it roped
off or is there i don't get it is there a fence up there dude the only thing roped
off is gonna
be you tomorrow i'm just joking guy it's just a surprise oh man okay well you're
gonna be you're
gonna be there at the party i'll be there cool but don't look me in the eyes
okay can i just say
something about the scene um i really didn't feel comfortable comforting i i
think that you're
nicer than that okay i know i'm being real i think i this is my honest truth
okay and when i said that
you were one of the good wives i really meant it i believe that if i was
imprisoned that you would
be really caring you would have tears in your eyes and you would really care i
don't know if you can
do that as an actor i don't think you have that kind of depth like johnny depp
yeah but i'm just
letting you know that we joked around just now but in real life i really
believe that you would make me
cry and go thank you so much sir okay you can't do it now i don't think i might
be able to
i don't really let's try it real all right so i'm going to be real too because
okay so here we go
is this taped yeah okay
sir i think they're gonna kill me tomorrow
you can't laugh man you're fucking up
the way you looked at me it was so fucking funny
it wasn't funny dude let's do it again sorry it's not funny you're gonna cut
cut let's do a scene
all right but the way you looked at me was so sincere it made me laugh so hard
so let's start
all right all right i'm gonna yeah that's what i'm supposed to do you fucking
piece of shit
all right all right just look away from me and turn to me like that when i say
my line
that's what i i know look at i get another shot at it
yeah oh my god oh my god
i thought that the white dude i don't know i don't know if he was your brother
or whatever
he goes i'm gonna hang you you gook tomorrow you flat-faced gook i'm scared
time for you to die you little fucking snap p is that it no that's let me try
again no that
all right that was look can i just say this why'd you call me that i mean that's
just like an old
nickname i think wait wait wait in the wait from where you're from you used to
call asians snap
peas dude look i don't even know any asians bro you're the only asian person
that i know dude except
for some like i've seen on the internet you know what's crazy is my sister can't
even read but what
does it have to do with us right now hope you enjoyed that video and you can
watch another and
you can watch this one you can watch this one different options different
choices some guy just
brings you one option not this guy two options watch one this one or this one