Name: Theo Von & Donnell Rawlings Talk About Race
Uploaded: 2020-03-24T16:00:07.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Theo Von & Donnell Rawlings Talk About Race' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-03-24. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Theo Von & Donnell Rawlings Talk About Race' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-03-24. Transcript available.

do you think that they have like do black guys from america look differently at
black guys that
come like say like there's a guy from jamaica or there's a guy from like zaire
who just moved
to america what's that relationship oh man that's when black guys feel white
you know what i'm saying
yeah you know i'm saying yeah i'm just saying i don't know what type of racism
is that called
or whatever you know what i'm saying but uh when somebody say which black guy
which black guy you
whatever you got one say me then one like it is me over here and that voice is
a tough one it's a
tough one you know what i'm saying that's a tough one that's wild man because
sometimes it's like
yeah i'm like that those types of people those black people from africa are so
different i feel
like them black people from america you know yeah they go-getters they're hustlers
oh they're hustlers
for sure yeah they're hustlers but it's it's funny like you if without without
hearing a black person
when you see him you have an instant connection with him yeah you know i'm
saying oh you do yeah
yeah you all you know you're like oh that's my nigga right there you know what
i'm saying but then
when they talk like when it's like this who are you calling a nigga you know i'm
saying oh no no
that's not what i meant you know yeah but just on the first look on skin
whatever you have like a
instant connection with yeah you know that's cool man yep i get nervous
sometimes you want to be black
son you ever thought about it oh yeah i've thought about it yeah when i was
like you know from age
you know 12 to 16 every white kid does you know so then i definitely did but
now i think i would want
to be mexican next i think for me blacks still seem a little too risky i would
wait one more
another year before you dabble another cycle like another life cycle whoa all
right like reincarnated
one time be latino and then so it's risky now just being black or risky being
black like in a car
it's still too risky for me i get nervous a lot you know i have fear and
anxiety oh yeah yeah yeah if
you get nervous now you wouldn't be a good black yeah not definitely you couldn't
handle traffic stops
dude do black people get nervous because it always seemed like to me when i was
growing up honestly
don't know that black people never got i was like fuck black people do not get
nervous now we see
we use different language like you call it nervous and then black people might
call it shook right you
know i'm saying like you wasn't you nervous now i was it's the same definition
but were you nervous
nah i was just a little shook yeah i mean we just don't identify with certain
things like when it
comes to uh like depression yeah white people can identify with depression
anxiety post whatever post
traumatic stress they could deal with that you know what i'm saying like you
ask a white person are you
stressed yeah i'm really stressed i'm feeling a little depressed yes white
person you stress you
stress black person like nah i ain't stress i'm just a little fucked up right
now you know what i'm
saying like that it's the words you use you know what i'm saying and i know
like like charlamagne
the guy he has this book called shook one and he was talking about the stigma
with black people
dealing with mental issues you know what i'm saying and he's as a person he's
saying from a person
is paying a therapist a hundred dollars an hour to talk to about problems yeah
average black person
from the hood can't afford a therapist what you're good for is a bag of weed
yeah a bottle of hennessy
and that's what we look through that's how we get um get we deal with mental
issues it's not the way
it should be but we don't use the same words because you get different drugs
you know what i'm saying
when you say when you say i'm a little uh stressed out anxiety you get prozac xanax
and all that type
shit if you say that to a black person you get weed so i might try to give you
a line and blow
you know what i'm saying it's not it's not the right thing to do but it's just
different definitions
i see you know oh that's it and all of us been a little fucked up right now but
the whole thing
about being a little fucked up right now is how you cope with things coping is
is number one thing
you have to deal with with any mental issues can you cope with it yeah yeah do
they have like
unique mental issues that you think black guys get that white guys don't get
i don't know if this is a mental issue but a lot of black guys get but white
guys
can't well they can but like jungle fever yeah you know i'm saying i don't
think that if that's a
mental disorder but it's something that's it's something that's a little taboo
in the black
community so is it scary would you bring a white girl home to like a black
thanksgiving
never wow i tried that i i tried that once before and i wow i'd be i feel
scared almost even thinking
about no i wouldn't do that because i did it one time i brought this white
chick home for thanksgiving
and the family they was like oh you know you love is love and it was like love
is love and she showed
up to thanksgiving with a tater tot casserole oh and she showed up with white
people potato salad yeah
and a potato salad the ingredients were uh apple chunks raisins cinnamon cranberries
and stuff like
that hope yeah no no cholesterol you know i mean and black people really get
upset if you bring the
wrong potato salad so i wouldn't advise bringing a white chick home for thanksgiving
christmas is
another thing but thanksgiving it's a lot of pressure it is yep dude so i
always have these weird
theories you know man and like i don't think i'm racist like i think at first
off anytime someone
starts to sentence off with i don't think i'm racist it's a little bit but you
got types of races the
type that people understand it it's comical and it's the type to get you fucked
up so which one
were you dealing with i think there was moments when i was what type of racist
are you i am
you answer that question quicker than i answer a family fuse right give your
your family will call it right there like good answer good answer good answer
good answer
no what type do you think you are i'm sorry i am the one i'm trying to be
honest about my racism
and try to get in so i can learn about it and learn from it you know i think i
was i probably was more
i definitely have more racial anger towards black people when i was younger
probably growing up in
the south or ignorance because ignorance ignorance is the is the is the
breeding ground for racism right
when you're an ignorant person it leads you in a situation where you could be
racist right you know
i'm saying i think it was fear may not be fear i think mine was fear like
because i knew some dudes
that were ignorant i knew dudes that drove around and like you know fuck black
people you know inward
this and i wasn't that you know and my mother wasn't that and my father wasn't
that like
you know so but i would get like you know there was just always you know like i
i rode on the bus
with the black kids to school so it was like you know the poor kids i don't i
don't the poor kids
i don't that's all right you know so where was that the front or the back of
the bus this is a
good answer um i stayed in the middle i stayed right in the back is where we
keep it real
you know i'm saying the snitches sat in the front so yeah the fun people the
people like myself
spitballs airplanes i was in the back and like people that were confused didn't
know which way
to go sat in the middle yeah i sat in the middle man i was scared but i would
get like you know black
kids were like there was like you know kids would fight the black kids were
always like stronger and
tougher so i felt like they were like if there was fights they would always win
the fights and so i
think i just had a lot more fear probably about you know i got jumped a couple
times yeah so i think i
had more fear but then i also had just as many like buddies that were black
because they were loose
like me like their parents were they were doing whatever they wanted just with
a bike and just
riding yeah but if you got beat up by i don't care what color person it was i
would have racist yeah
like if i got jumped in the age of 12 by a whole bunch of asian dudes i would
never watch a
kung fu movie for the rest of my life so i gotta side with you on that whatever
race beats you up
with your kid fuck no motherfuckers so i think it just made me scared right but
i think there's also
this thing i felt like but like you want to there's there's there's this
obsession with black culture
that people want to be they want to relate to it so much it's cool if you go to
any other country
whatever the people that they emulate the most especially like with hip-hop is
black culture
yeah i don't know what it is i don't know that it goes back to you know when
black folks were all
you know black folks were always in entertainment i don't know where it comes
from but for some reason
people are curious about that lifestyle yeah well knowing two black friends is
better than having
fucking cable these days like you know i'm saying black friends yeah but as far
as entertainment goes
knowing to just spending time with you know black people like to laugh more
they like to there's just more
shit going on they might know somebody that got shot like there's just like
people like to laugh
harder harder like you do you do a um a black comedy club you know if they like
you yeah you know
if you get oh shit stop stop this motherfucker yo yo yo yo yo yo yo stop it
they let you feel it
yeah and it's so weird because i came up from the black circuit you know right
so i'm used to people
do when i do my shows if you rip it you can feel it then i start doing the
mainstream and crossover stuff
and i start doing white rooms and sometimes it was hard to tell because you'll
get a chuckle
they'll point to you like this now that's funny oh that's a great bit or this
two thumbs up and like
i couldn't understand i would do shows sometimes i get off stage i was like i
hate that shit
they were coming like this oh my god you fucking killed bro the way you set up
and the premise and
the callback to you i'm like i don't want you to break down comedy motherfucker
i want you to laugh
but also the black community in the black comedy club you have the joke haters
yeah the motherfuckers
just angry for anything and joke haters they always like ventriloquist joke
haters laugh like this
you know you'll say some funny shit they like zah you good you good you was
funny but you wasn't funny
funny funny funny but white people white people when they like you they fucking
get on the yelp reports
yeah they're the only people that do the comment cards if you look at a comic
card at any comic club
there's never gonna be a steinberg i mean there's never gonna be a johnson or
smith
fuck that comic comic club white people like oh my god who is my favorite
they leave comments and they always sign up for the email list always white
people on everybody's
guestbook son when the show is over it was like um i noticed you didn't mention
anything about your
guestbook is there a place where i can sign up for your newsletter black people
just like how did
you know about the nigga told me who told you about the show the streets nigga
the streets do you miss
when you see um do you like sometimes what i miss like old school black guys
like now it seemed like a
lot of the black guys are like a little softer like a little bit like i saw a
black guy with glasses
the other day like you'll see it's nothing wrong with yo that's so
disrespectful sir it's nothing wrong
with the glasses everybody at some point like probably wear glasses now the
disrespectful motherfuckers
they always gotta let you they think it's a level of intellect when they just
keep pushing it up oh
yeah i hate the ones that like enforce a part like like let me taste yeah those
people in glasses but
you shouldn't you know just because a black person wear glasses i don't think
you should form any
other opinion about them because of that motherfuckers gotta read bro yeah you
know i'm just real
for i i feel like it was it seemed like it was just different black kids when i
was growing up than
there are now you know like they had a black guy with the other day with asthma
that i met and that
shit fucking yo every black person i knew growing up and grew up growing up had
asthma oh really yo
when you're living in projects with metal lead pipes you're gonna have some
respiratory issues
you know what i'm saying go to cleveland anywhere in new york lead pipe
shit you got asthma yo when your parents are smoking newports in the bathroom
you gonna have an asthma
pump i'm just that's some shit just happens you want no real nigga if you ain't
got asthma when i
grew up yo you ain't got asthma you can't hang with us oh no asthma have an
asthma motherfucker
where your asthma at you better have some asthma around this bitch dude we had
a girl named asthma
wilson wilson too in our junior high uh-huh um what about asthma yeah but white
people have allergies
yeah yeah hold on i'm gonna tell you i'm not a black i'm not a fucking black
guy who said he was
feeling dizzy bro and that shit fucking shit that means he was a little fucked
up right now yo i'm telling
you man they have allergies white people have allergies and they let their
allergies be known i can't get on a
flight now without some white person stopping me from getting that tested bag
of peanuts man
get a motherfucking train bro you know what i'm saying hey guys hey 300 people
um michael
michael michael's michael herbivich i'm just trying to give up the whitest name
has an allergy
problem to peanuts so now nobody can have peanuts get the fuck out of here with
them allergies
fuck that man but what about this though you uh do um when i was young like now
they have more it
seem like black diseases like when i was young they had diabetes was popular
that's still strong and
blood pressure right that's still strong and whatever but now there's other
stuff you know it's like
other you know there's a black guy had chicken pox i remember the other day
that's not that's
what is that was in vietnam yeah chicken pot they got vaccination yo you should
yo you don't live in
you get chicken pox and in the united states say yo yo yo your health care is
not upside that
shit is only supposed to be in africa and motherfucking haiti and thailand so
you should
not be able to get chicken pox in america but i'm just saying black people are
getting like weak diseases
that used to be only white people would get it seems like that's something you
know like the only black
diseases i know it's it's um it's gonna always stay in the test of time is the
itis yeah you know every
i think every black person i've ever went to school with or grew up with all
had the itis what is it
the itis is um it's like autism no itis is something like i don't know like in
the black community where
okay let's say you eat a lot of food you get tired one take oh yeah you know i'm
saying that white
people have a name for it during thanksgiving it's something that's released in
turkey tryptophan
trip tryptophan see and a white guy knew the answer to that right it was like
no i don't know what
you said you know but that's one of the diseases very very very strong in black
community and it's
never going to be a cure for it well relax the itis yeah when you get the itis
no like when you eat a
lot and then you feel oh man i gotta lay down i gotta get the itis yeah and you
usually get it from stuff
like like like like steaks yeah cheeseburger ribs ribs if you eat ribs it's
like that's like you and
you inducing it you you make it happen to yourself yeah but black people gonna
have had the itis for
years and will probably continue to have the itis and i know that um i know
that uh reverend al
sharpens at a point it's like he he's a vegan right now so he don't really yeah
he's a what is that
how do y'all treat that that seems not like a black thing in the black
community we think i know
this is so fucked up if you vegan we think you're gay at the same time you know
what i'm saying
and i'm like and look man i feel you and i can be like just changing your diet
yeah you could be
black people so homophobic like changing your diet could cost them a lot you
know what i'm saying
go to like a hamburger spot with a black dude and you order your cheeseburger
with like blue i love
with like swiss cheese or cottage cheese they'll be on the phone they'll be
they'll be on the
oh not cottage cheese swiss cheese like crumble or blue cheese if you order
blue cheese if you order blue
cheese if you order blue cheese around that's a gateway drug that's a gateway
they'll be on that's
the gateway they'll be on the phone like yo this motherfucker changed son i
just caught this
motherfucker eating with a burger with blue cheese not that he chose a better
cheese but i caught him
eating it you know what i'm saying you don't put mayonnaise on your burger
there's gonna be some
issues and you don't got to answer to me you got to answer to the streets yeah
is that the life you
want if that's how that's the perception you want people to have of you that
you eat burgers with
swiss cheese and cottage cheese oh crumbles and shit like that man it's gross
bro straight up crafts
deluxe all day represent brooklyn you know that's just it damn that's why wow
you know what's crazy is
my sister can't even read but what does it have to do with us right now hope
you enjoyed that video
and you can watch another and you can watch this one you can watch this one
different options
different choices some guy just brings you one option not this guy two options
watch one this one or this

Theo Von & Donnell Rawlings Talk About Race

do you think that they have like do black guys from america look differently at
black guys that
come like say like there's a guy from jamaica or there's a guy from like zaire
who just moved
to america what's that relationship oh man that's when black guys feel white
you know what i'm saying
yeah you know i'm saying yeah i'm just saying i don't know what type of racism
is that called
or whatever you know what i'm saying but uh when somebody say which black guy
which black guy you
whatever you got one say me then one like it is me over here and that voice is
a tough one it's a
tough one you know what i'm saying that's a tough one that's wild man because
sometimes it's like
yeah i'm like that those types of people those black people from africa are so
different i feel
like them black people from america you know yeah they go-getters they're hustlers
oh they're hustlers
for sure yeah they're hustlers but it's it's funny like you if without without
hearing a black person
when you see him you have an instant connection with him yeah you know i'm
saying oh you do yeah
yeah you all you know you're like oh that's my nigga right there you know what
i'm saying but then
when they talk like when it's like this who are you calling a nigga you know i'm
saying oh no no
that's not what i meant you know yeah but just on the first look on skin
whatever you have like a
instant connection with yeah you know that's cool man yep i get nervous
sometimes you want to be black
son you ever thought about it oh yeah i've thought about it yeah when i was
like you know from age
you know 12 to 16 every white kid does you know so then i definitely did but
now i think i would want
to be mexican next i think for me blacks still seem a little too risky i would
wait one more
another year before you dabble another cycle like another life cycle whoa all
right like reincarnated
one time be latino and then so it's risky now just being black or risky being
black like in a car
it's still too risky for me i get nervous a lot you know i have fear and
anxiety oh yeah yeah yeah if
you get nervous now you wouldn't be a good black yeah not definitely you couldn't
handle traffic stops
dude do black people get nervous because it always seemed like to me when i was
growing up honestly
don't know that black people never got i was like fuck black people do not get
nervous now we see
we use different language like you call it nervous and then black people might
call it shook right you
know i'm saying like you wasn't you nervous now i was it's the same definition
but were you nervous
nah i was just a little shook yeah i mean we just don't identify with certain
things like when it
comes to uh like depression yeah white people can identify with depression
anxiety post whatever post
traumatic stress they could deal with that you know what i'm saying like you
ask a white person are you
stressed yeah i'm really stressed i'm feeling a little depressed yes white
person you stress you
stress black person like nah i ain't stress i'm just a little fucked up right
now you know what i'm
saying like that it's the words you use you know what i'm saying and i know
like like charlamagne
the guy he has this book called shook one and he was talking about the stigma
with black people
dealing with mental issues you know what i'm saying and he's as a person he's
saying from a person
is paying a therapist a hundred dollars an hour to talk to about problems yeah
average black person
from the hood can't afford a therapist what you're good for is a bag of weed
yeah a bottle of hennessy
and that's what we look through that's how we get um get we deal with mental
issues it's not the way
it should be but we don't use the same words because you get different drugs
you know what i'm saying
when you say when you say i'm a little uh stressed out anxiety you get prozac xanax
and all that type
shit if you say that to a black person you get weed so i might try to give you
a line and blow
you know what i'm saying it's not it's not the right thing to do but it's just
different definitions
i see you know oh that's it and all of us been a little fucked up right now but
the whole thing
about being a little fucked up right now is how you cope with things coping is
is number one thing
you have to deal with with any mental issues can you cope with it yeah yeah do
they have like
unique mental issues that you think black guys get that white guys don't get
i don't know if this is a mental issue but a lot of black guys get but white
guys
can't well they can but like jungle fever yeah you know i'm saying i don't
think that if that's a
mental disorder but it's something that's it's something that's a little taboo
in the black
community so is it scary would you bring a white girl home to like a black
thanksgiving
never wow i tried that i i tried that once before and i wow i'd be i feel
scared almost even thinking
about no i wouldn't do that because i did it one time i brought this white
chick home for thanksgiving
and the family they was like oh you know you love is love and it was like love
is love and she showed
up to thanksgiving with a tater tot casserole oh and she showed up with white
people potato salad yeah
and a potato salad the ingredients were uh apple chunks raisins cinnamon cranberries
and stuff like
that hope yeah no no cholesterol you know i mean and black people really get
upset if you bring the
wrong potato salad so i wouldn't advise bringing a white chick home for thanksgiving
christmas is
another thing but thanksgiving it's a lot of pressure it is yep dude so i
always have these weird
theories you know man and like i don't think i'm racist like i think at first
off anytime someone
starts to sentence off with i don't think i'm racist it's a little bit but you
got types of races the
type that people understand it it's comical and it's the type to get you fucked
up so which one
were you dealing with i think there was moments when i was what type of racist
are you i am
you answer that question quicker than i answer a family fuse right give your
your family will call it right there like good answer good answer good answer
good answer
no what type do you think you are i'm sorry i am the one i'm trying to be
honest about my racism
and try to get in so i can learn about it and learn from it you know i think i
was i probably was more
i definitely have more racial anger towards black people when i was younger
probably growing up in
the south or ignorance because ignorance ignorance is the is the is the
breeding ground for racism right
when you're an ignorant person it leads you in a situation where you could be
racist right you know
i'm saying i think it was fear may not be fear i think mine was fear like
because i knew some dudes
that were ignorant i knew dudes that drove around and like you know fuck black
people you know inward
this and i wasn't that you know and my mother wasn't that and my father wasn't
that like
you know so but i would get like you know there was just always you know like i
i rode on the bus
with the black kids to school so it was like you know the poor kids i don't i
don't the poor kids
i don't that's all right you know so where was that the front or the back of
the bus this is a
good answer um i stayed in the middle i stayed right in the back is where we
keep it real
you know i'm saying the snitches sat in the front so yeah the fun people the
people like myself
spitballs airplanes i was in the back and like people that were confused didn't
know which way
to go sat in the middle yeah i sat in the middle man i was scared but i would
get like you know black
kids were like there was like you know kids would fight the black kids were
always like stronger and
tougher so i felt like they were like if there was fights they would always win
the fights and so i
think i just had a lot more fear probably about you know i got jumped a couple
times yeah so i think i
had more fear but then i also had just as many like buddies that were black
because they were loose
like me like their parents were they were doing whatever they wanted just with
a bike and just
riding yeah but if you got beat up by i don't care what color person it was i
would have racist yeah
like if i got jumped in the age of 12 by a whole bunch of asian dudes i would
never watch a
kung fu movie for the rest of my life so i gotta side with you on that whatever
race beats you up
with your kid fuck no motherfuckers so i think it just made me scared right but
i think there's also
this thing i felt like but like you want to there's there's there's this
obsession with black culture
that people want to be they want to relate to it so much it's cool if you go to
any other country
whatever the people that they emulate the most especially like with hip-hop is
black culture
yeah i don't know what it is i don't know that it goes back to you know when
black folks were all
you know black folks were always in entertainment i don't know where it comes
from but for some reason
people are curious about that lifestyle yeah well knowing two black friends is
better than having
fucking cable these days like you know i'm saying black friends yeah but as far
as entertainment goes
knowing to just spending time with you know black people like to laugh more
they like to there's just more
shit going on they might know somebody that got shot like there's just like
people like to laugh
harder harder like you do you do a um a black comedy club you know if they like
you yeah you know
if you get oh shit stop stop this motherfucker yo yo yo yo yo yo yo stop it
they let you feel it
yeah and it's so weird because i came up from the black circuit you know right
so i'm used to people
do when i do my shows if you rip it you can feel it then i start doing the
mainstream and crossover stuff
and i start doing white rooms and sometimes it was hard to tell because you'll
get a chuckle
they'll point to you like this now that's funny oh that's a great bit or this
two thumbs up and like
i couldn't understand i would do shows sometimes i get off stage i was like i
hate that shit
they were coming like this oh my god you fucking killed bro the way you set up
and the premise and
the callback to you i'm like i don't want you to break down comedy motherfucker
i want you to laugh
but also the black community in the black comedy club you have the joke haters
yeah the motherfuckers
just angry for anything and joke haters they always like ventriloquist joke
haters laugh like this
you know you'll say some funny shit they like zah you good you good you was
funny but you wasn't funny
funny funny funny but white people white people when they like you they fucking
get on the yelp reports
yeah they're the only people that do the comment cards if you look at a comic
card at any comic club
there's never gonna be a steinberg i mean there's never gonna be a johnson or
smith
fuck that comic comic club white people like oh my god who is my favorite
they leave comments and they always sign up for the email list always white
people on everybody's
guestbook son when the show is over it was like um i noticed you didn't mention
anything about your
guestbook is there a place where i can sign up for your newsletter black people
just like how did
you know about the nigga told me who told you about the show the streets nigga
the streets do you miss
when you see um do you like sometimes what i miss like old school black guys
like now it seemed like a
lot of the black guys are like a little softer like a little bit like i saw a
black guy with glasses
the other day like you'll see it's nothing wrong with yo that's so
disrespectful sir it's nothing wrong
with the glasses everybody at some point like probably wear glasses now the
disrespectful motherfuckers
they always gotta let you they think it's a level of intellect when they just
keep pushing it up oh
yeah i hate the ones that like enforce a part like like let me taste yeah those
people in glasses but
you shouldn't 