Name: Theo Von Asks Brad Williams Questions About Being A Dwarf
Uploaded: 2020-05-20T16:00:31.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Theo Von Asks Brad Williams Questions About Being A Dwarf' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-05-20. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Theo Von Asks Brad Williams Questions About Being A Dwarf' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-05-20. Transcript available.

I remember the first time I ever met you Brad it was like I was at USC I don't
know what I was doing
not learning I was there just as like an outsider and uh yeah and you came up
on a motorbike yeah
like a small motorbike yeah and I'd never seen anything like this like you know
where I was
growing up they had one man who was kind of a smaller man that did um mechanic
work you know
makes sense and he uh get in there yeah exactly yeah oh yeah I remember they
would sometimes open
the hood put him under there and then close the hood and he'd fix it while
people were driving
no just so just oh he would be in there like and he would hide he would do a
lot of hiding I'm gonna
hide you know which I think you know I don't know that's an advantage yeah but
um but yeah man I
remember and then you pulled up at a pretty good clip of speed and I was like
oh my god I'm in
another I had like just gotten into Los Angeles I'm like I'm in another world
well you know that
scare tactics show that you mentioned uh like they basically every prank
involved a little person
yeah they're like oh she's afraid of teddy bears what if we put uh what if we
put brad in this teddy
bear and we'll make him run around and make him act like a teddy bear at first
but then I run around
yeah that's good and then the next one's like some lab where it's a giant rat
and they're like yeah
put brad in a giant rat costume rat monster everything is based around a little
person but yeah the
guy not got no glory yeah and I I totally remember that because that uh rate a
razor scooter uh released
these electric scooters back in the day but like they they had one that was
looked really cheesy and
then they had one that looked like a like a west coast chopper yeah and I'm
like all these other
kids around USC get to class on a bike I'm riding my west coast chopper razor
scooter so I would
roll it was insane I'd never seen anything like it I didn't know the laws yeah
at school because I was
going there I went to USC oh my gosh so like yeah and I I think yeah I booked
you for like a comedy
show on campus or something dude you must have been a legend you were like how
many dwarves you went to
UFC uh you at UFC I don't know where you went you I'm not good with schools and
letters yeah yeah it
was uh dwarf UFC happened in a ball pit at Chuck E. Cheese dude don't start
something that's gonna be
huge uh no uh it was no it was me and then there was a teacher there oh okay
and everyone thought I
was his kid right like everyone that's how dumb people are about dwarves they
must be related yeah
everyone thought that like that's how I got in is like it's that oh well your
dad works at USC so
that's how you got in it's like no I got in it's because they needed something
they need someone
for the pamphlet do you also I have a regular brain and I'm a regular person
they think there
must be something yeah yeah yeah no yeah yeah he got in because he cast a spell
on the president
yeah I've always wondered like do you like you know is it okay to talk about
being if somebody
is a small person or smaller or a little bit different sure um but what I'm
thinking is like
sometimes I'll see like you know they have LGTBQ community yeah but they don't
factor in like uh
but little people don't get factored into that well well that's the LPA
community oh little
people of America okay that's not even a joke it's it's it's yeah LPA which was
started by
Billy Barty uh the actor and then actually when they started they were called
midgets of America
and then they changed it so that's why yeah there it is so uh that so that yeah
when they started it
it was called midgets of America killed it man this guy was in everything yeah
so wait
so this guy started the LPA yep and so yeah so there's a lot of dwarves that
have boned each
other because of this man oh nice because he started LPA oh because then it's a
place to meet other
people that are smaller thank you thank you for what you did there's without
this guy we wouldn't
have all those shitty shows on TLC which were some of my favorite shows too
I hate those shows on TLC really yeah we're like we're a family of little
people you're like I
don't give a shit and they literally like aren't we're just like everyone else
you're like then
why am I watching it yeah if you're just like everyone else then why is this
why what but that
one family you're little man yeah little people big world yeah I hate them I
loved them why no not me
the sister was fine bro why is the dad I mean when she was older sitting in the
tall dude's lap
like it looks like the dad is disrespect in that photo it looks like the dad is
sitting in the tall
dude's lap I hate these shows I hate these kind of shows yeah well what
fascinated about me about
this show I remember specifically was they ran a pumpkin ranch yeah and the
fact in my mind yeah
blew my mind that you had small people growing the largest vegetable I remember
I used to do I
used to do jokes about it I was like pumpkins are big squash they're just lugging
around like ants
but that's like think of it like yeah that yeah I mean oh there you go it would
it would make way
more sense that they're like oh uh they have a strawberry patch yeah yeah cherries
make sense let me hustle
these kumquats that's where I was gonna go um yeah there's like no we no we got
pumpkins baby
tomatoes we're just overachievers I love it do you sometimes but sometimes do
you ever look at like
a gay person or a a diverse person a black person uh maybe a vietnamese maybe
um it's gonna be a fun
question for me to answer let's go and does it ever but you don't talk about
but I just love you're
searching for uh words to feel okay black filipino uh you know people like you
know uh
but do you know what I'm talking about unique friends I'll call them
tread lightly hey man we're only white guys we don't got a thing but is there
camaraderie there
like if you see like if you're walking down the street like in like a white
neighborhood and there's
a black guy and he's walking down the street is there camaraderie if you guys
see each other kind of
oh between like me and a black guy yeah no but I will say this uh there's not
that instant there isn't that
instant camaraderie but I I used to do a bit about this and it's real like I
would loved how black people
would react to seeing dwarves oh really like it it was never totally different
yeah it was never just
like there's a person and like it was never that it was like oh shit little man
like that's my guy
like they dab you up always like always like insanely friendly but yet kind of
insulting you
know it's like oh what up big man it's like why would you say big man to me
that is like what do you
see a guy in a wheelchair and just be like yo legs what's going on like but
also it does feel kind
of good because like this black guy's being really nice to me but also yeah I
should get mad at him
for doing this yeah yeah yeah and then uh and then like like there was one time
it was yo it was back
when I was at USC that hurts me man that they do that I always found it funny I
was uh I was at USC
and then I was on the street where all the fraternities are it's called it's
called the row it's
where all uh fraternity sorority rows are and I was with a few of my friends
and like a group of black
guys came up to me and my buddies and just started like like aggressively
positively complimenting me
but then calling me the n-word but like and then like one of my friends got
jealous he's like what
I'm not a and and and and they looked at him like no like hell no so you don't
we're cool with the
little one yeah yeah yeah I got a pass so you don't so you get so there's times
where you get an n-word
pass I like not to say it but I get called it right and you get to be one yeah
wow you're really in
but yeah that's crazy yeah so so there's not like now if I walk down the street
and I see
another person who has some kind of disability either they're in a chair or an
or an another dwarf
then then we give each other like a nod like what's up okay you know the
struggle I love it so
but but but that kind of stops there it doesn't go into like because yeah I
always wondered like
if you see a black guy and they're in like a play like because you know a lot
of black people feel
like outliers kind of you know in the in the u.s and so I was wondering like
but they don't do that
with each other either it's not like black people nod at like uh Puerto Ricans
or Vietnamese or like
you know I'm saying I don't know I don't think that they do that that doesn't
cross borders like
lesbians aren't like what's up black guy like this has been three white guys
discuss race
but I don't think they do that we're just wondering I don't know you're the
closest thing we have to a
black guy right now uh look this up there's gotta stop there's a I don't know
if it's a high
school or a college um in Oklahoma where like their mascot is like the fighting
midgets really yeah
and like everyone uh there's some high school there was one in Illinois
actually I know a kid that I
think went to a school and the midget was a mascot of fighting midgets midgets
mascot dickinson high
south dakota oh south dakota north dakota there it is dickinson high school in
north dakota
oh they changed it they changed it from the midgets to the mustangs
I don't know if I like that the little people of America have more clout than
all of Native
Americans because when I saw that uh high school was called the fighting midgets
I'm like I want a
t-shirt yeah it's cool I mean like I don't I don't want you to shut down if the
intentions are
good I think yeah that's that's how I measure it not everyone measures it that
way but that's right
that and it's like you're naming your school the fighting midgets that means
you think
that the midget is intimidating powerful yeah you know what I mean that means
it's like oh you're a
tiger fuck you we're the midgets and when in real life we would be a snack but
they're like no
what's worse being ignored and acting like you're not a thing yes or being
acknowledged and and dealing
with whatever kind of uncomfortability of that difference is does that make
sense no it totally
and and and because the worst thing you could do to anyone who uh is quote
unquote different is ignore
that right and ignore and ignore the difference yeah uh yeah like if I see a
guy it happened this weekend
uh oh okay this so I did shows in Oklahoma City this weekend and right in the
front row uh a female
dwarf sat right in the front row she's right and it's just it was like okay I
have to mention this I
can't not talk about the fact that there's a dwarf right there in the front row
and I asked her what she
did for a living and no bullshit she goes I'm a psychologist and I go and I
started laughing
and everyone's like why are you laughing I go because she's a shrink
oh that's perfect and I'm like come come on like you've got a perfect she loved
it
she loved it and and and that moment would have never happened sure if I would
have just ignored
like oh I don't see another little person right in my audience what's up big tiffany
she's like
yeah exactly no one's ever called me that that's a big girl but that's like how
I want to live my
life is like I I'm I'm friends with lots of different people walks of life I
don't just
blanketly think I'm a good person and not knowing you know how many people are
like these we got to
fight for these trans rights I'm like name five of your trans friends and they're
like well I've never
like met a trans yeah exactly shut the hell up yeah yeah yeah it gets tricky
like that dude it's uh
it's just hectic man it's hectic to like yeah I think it but naturally you feel
a certain way like
naturally you kind of know how to behave yeah you know I feel like and then you
can tell if somebody
else is upset yeah you know you go okay that was bad right yeah that was too
much and then you
apologize something you're asking him like questions I mean you guys probably
been friends for a long
time but you'll ask him questions like hey is it okay if I just ask you and
that's I think way more
respectful than having someone and just completely like my buddy's uh my buddy
Nico's his son has like
uh like kind of a birth defect in his hand so he's kind of what he's like Spock
yeah kind of like a
ninja turtle you know he's got like three and oh like Ryan Neemiller kind of
like what do you mean
like uh like I just asked what happened yeah and he was happy to talk about it
and we didn't have
it have to be this like weird like hey what happened here so you know yeah yeah
you I think that's how
you should address those things yeah let's talk about that's how I do it
usually like if I'll see
somebody that's missing a limb or something I'll just ask him hey what happened
you know how did
you lose your leg what happened to your leg you know I'm just trying to get a
Starbucks like just
tell me what happened yeah tell me what happened to that leg like let me sign
it and they're like
it's not a cast it's uh a piece of titanium and they're like well have a good
summer he's like
get away from me with that marks a lot never change um yeah it's like I can't
be a professional
basketball player uh because you know you had to find another way because I'm
white right
that's a good joke I didn't write that one down but uh yeah but like so I found
a job where I could
I could be a professional figure it out do it did you ever did you ever think
because you were a
smaller person Brad that um in stature only that you uh that you um should have
got like an extra
something from the government or anything like a TLC show or something like a TLC
show
every dwarf gets a TLC show that's all they do dude that's what it's gonna be
like one day they
should just have the dwarf network we got all we got we got the wwe network you
got like diy
networks just have the dwarf network it'd be cool huh all dwarf shows all the
time serious yeah the
only problem with those shows is they're always trying to convince that there's
nothing unordinary
right the entire time we're just like everyone else yeah no no we're not you're
not like everyone
else i'm not like the show would be super boring yeah and the guy runs and
jumps up into bed
yeah we want to see how you how you're navigating your life because it's
inspirational to know that
you're reg that you're just like all of us yeah except you're dealing with
something that makes
you different than us but like how you're yeah i'm not like everybody else
because uh i have to put my
bag up at the up in the overhead storage bin and i gotta get creative yeah
black guys don't come up
to me and go wait what's up big man like look at this one look at this little
guy like that never
happened to me it's different okay good afternoon and other times thanks for
watching that video you
just saw i mean it was okay but the next video you could watch could be way
better what if you watch
a video right now that changes your life well you could watch this one or watch
this one watch this one
one watch this one watch this one ah

Theo Von Asks Brad Williams Questions About Being A Dwarf

I remember the first time I ever met you Brad it was like I was at USC I don't
know what I was doing
not learning I was there just as like an outsider and uh yeah and you came up
on a motorbike yeah
like a small motorbike yeah and I'd never seen anything like this like you know
where I was
growing up they had one man who was kind of a smaller man that did um mechanic
work you know
makes sense and he uh get in there yeah exactly yeah oh yeah I remember they
would sometimes open
the hood put him under there and then close the hood and he'd fix it while
people were driving
no just so just oh he would be in there like and he would hide he would do a
lot of hiding I'm gonna
hide you know which I think you know I don't know that's an advantage yeah but
um but yeah man I
remember and then you pulled up at a pretty good clip of speed and I was like
oh my god I'm in
another I had like just gotten into Los Angeles I'm like I'm in another world
well you know that
scare tactics show that you mentioned uh like they basically every prank
involved a little person
yeah they're like oh she's afraid of teddy bears what if we put uh what if we
put brad in this teddy
bear and we'll make him run around and make him act like a teddy bear at first
but then I run around
yeah that's good and then the next one's like some lab where it's a giant rat
and they're like yeah
put brad in a giant rat costume rat monster everything is based around a little
person but yeah the
guy not got no glory yeah and I I totally remember that because that uh rate a
razor scooter uh released
these electric scooters back in the day but like they they had one that was
looked really cheesy and
then they had one that looked like a like a west coast chopper yeah and I'm
like all these other
kids around USC get to class on a bike I'm riding my west coast chopper razor
scooter so I would
roll it was insane I'd never seen anything like it I didn't know the laws yeah
at school because I was
going there I went to USC oh my gosh so like yeah and I I think yeah I booked
you for like a comedy
show on campus or something dude you must have been a legend you were like how
many dwarves you went to
UFC uh you at UFC I don't know where you went you I'm not good with schools and
letters yeah yeah it
was uh dwarf UFC happened in a ball pit at Chuck E. Cheese dude don't start
something that's gonna be
huge uh no uh it was no it was me and then there was a teacher there oh okay
and everyone thought I
was his kid right like everyone that's how dumb people are about dwarves they
must be related yeah
everyone thought that like that's how I got in is like it's that oh well your
dad works at USC so
that's how you got in it's like no I got in it's because they needed something
they need someone
for the pamphlet do you also I have a regular brain and I'm a regular person
they think there
must be something yeah yeah yeah no yeah yeah he got in because he cast a spell
on the president
yeah I've always wondered like do you like you know is it okay to talk about
being if somebody
is a small person or smaller or a little bit different sure um but what I'm
thinking is like
sometimes I'll see like you know they have LGTBQ community yeah but they don't
factor in like uh
but little people don't get factored into that well well that's the LPA
community oh little
people of America okay that's not even a joke it's it's it's yeah LPA which was
started by
Billy Barty uh the actor and then actually when they started they were called
midgets of America
and then they changed it so that's why yeah there it is so uh that so that yeah
when they started it
it was called midgets of America killed it man this guy was in everything yeah
so wait
so this guy started the LPA yep and so yeah so there's a lot of dwarves that
have boned each
other because of this man oh nice because he started LPA oh because then it's a
place to meet other
people that are smaller thank you thank you for what you did there's without
this guy we wouldn't
have all those shitty shows on TLC which were some of my favorite shows too
I hate those shows on TLC really yeah we're like we're a family of little
people you're like I
don't give a shit and they literally like aren't we're just like everyone else
you're like then
why am I watching it yeah if you're just like everyone else then why is this
why what but that
one family you're little man yeah little people big world yeah I hate them I
loved them why no not me
the sister was fine bro why is the dad I mean when she was older sitting in the
tall dude's lap
like it looks like the dad is disrespect in that photo it looks like the dad is
sitting in the tall
dude's lap I hate these shows I hate these kind of shows yeah well what
fascinated about me about
this show I remember specifically was they ran a pumpkin ranch yeah and the
fact in my mind yeah
blew my mind that you had small people growing the largest vegetable I remember
I used to do I
used to do jokes about it I was like pumpkins are big squash they're just lugging
around like ants
but that's like think of it like yeah that yeah I mean oh there you go it would
it would make way
more sense that they're like oh uh they have a strawberry patch yeah yeah cherries
make sense let me hustle
these kumquats that's where I was gonna go um yeah there's like no we no we got
pumpkins baby
tomatoes we're just overachievers I love it do you sometimes but sometimes do
you ever look at like
a gay person or a a diverse person a black person uh maybe a vietnamese maybe
um it's gonna be a fun
question for me to answer let's go and does it ever but you don't talk about
but I just love you're
searching for uh words to feel okay black filipino uh you know people like you
know uh
but do you know what I'm talking about unique friends I'll call them
tread lightly hey man we're only white guys we don't got a thing but is there
camaraderie there
like if you see like if you're walking down the street like in like a white
neighborhood and there's
a black guy and he's walking down the street is there camaraderie if you guys
see each other kind of
oh between like me and a black guy yeah no but I will say this uh there's not
that instant there isn't that
instant camaraderie but I I used to do a bit about this and it's real like I
would loved how black people
would react to seeing dwarves oh really like it it was never totally different
yeah it was never just
like there's a person and like it was never that it was like oh shit little man
like that's my guy
like they dab you up always like always like insanely friendly but yet kind of
insulting you
know it's like oh what up big man it's like why would you say big man to me
that is like what do you
see a guy in a wheelchair and just be like yo legs what's going on like but
also it does feel kind
of good because like this black guy's being really nice to me but also yeah I
should get mad at him
for doing this yeah yeah yeah and then uh and then like like there was one time
it was yo it was back
when I was at USC that hurts me man that they do that I always found it funny I
was uh I was at USC
and then I was on the street where all the fraternities are it's called it's
called the row it's
where all uh fraternity sorority rows are and I was with a few of my friends
and like a group of black
guys came up to me and my buddies and just started like like aggressively
positively complimenting me
but then calling me the n-word but like and then like one of my friends got
jealous he's like what
I'm not a and and and and they looked at him like no like hell no so you don't
we're cool with the
little one yeah yeah yeah I got a pass so you don't so you get so there's times
where you get an n-word
pass I like not to say it but I get called it right and you get to be one yeah
wow you're really in
but yeah that's crazy yeah so so there's not like now if I walk down the street
and I see
another person who has some kind of disability either they're in a chair or an
or an another dwarf
then then we give each other like a nod like what's up okay you know the
struggle I love it so
but but but that kind of stops there it doesn't go into like because yeah I
always wondered like
if you see a black guy and they're in like a play like because you know a lot
of black people feel
like outliers kind of you know in the in the u.s and so I was wondering like
but they don't do that
with each other either it's not like black people nod at like uh Puerto Ricans
or Vietnamese or like
you know I'm saying I don't know I don't think that they do that that doesn't
cross borders like
lesbians aren't like what's up black guy like this has been three white guys
discuss race
but I don't think they do that we're just wondering I don't know you're the
closest thing we have to a
black guy right now uh look this up there's gotta stop there's a I don't know
if it's a high
school or a college um in Oklahoma where like their mascot is like the fighting
midgets really yeah
and like everyone uh there's some high school there was one in Illinois
actually I know a kid that I
think went to a school and the midget was a mascot of fighting midgets midgets
mascot dickinson high
south dakota oh south dakota north dakota there it is dickinson high school in
north dakota
oh they changed it they changed it from the midgets to the mustangs
I don't know if I like that the little people of America have more clout than
all of Native
Americans because when I saw that uh high school was called the fighting midgets
I'm like I want a
t-shirt yeah it's cool I mean like I don't I don't want you to shut down if the
intentions are
good I think yeah that's that's how I measure it not everyone measures it that
way but that's right
that and it's like you're naming your school the fighting midgets that means
you think
that the midget is intimidating powerful yeah you know what I mean that means
it's like oh you're a
tiger fuck you we're the midgets and when in real life we would be a snack but
they're like no
what's worse being ignored and acting like you're not a thing yes or being
acknowledged and and dealing
with whatever kind of uncomfortability of that difference is does that make
sense no it totally
and and and because the worst thing you could do to anyone who uh is quote
unquote different is ignore
that right and ignore and ignore the difference yeah uh yeah like if I see a
guy it happened this weekend
uh oh okay this so I did shows in Oklahoma City this weekend and right in the
front row uh a female
dwarf sat right in the front row she's right and it's just it was like okay I
have to mention this I
can't not talk about the fact that there's a dwarf right there in the front row
and I asked her what she
did for a living and no bullshit she goes I'm a psychologist and I go and I
started laughing
and everyone's like why are you laughing I go because she's a shrink
oh that's perfect and I'm like come come on like you've got a perfect she loved
it
she loved it and and and that moment would have never happened sure if I would
have just ignored
like oh I don't see another little person right in my audience what's up big tiffany
she's like
yeah exactly no one's ever called me that that's a big girl but that's like how
I want to live my
life is like I I'm I'm friends with lots of different people walks of life I
don't just
blanketly think I'm a good person and not knowing you know how many people are
like these we got to
fight for these trans rights I'm like name five of your trans friends and they're
like well I've never
like met a trans yeah exactly shut the hell up yeah yeah yeah it gets tricky
like that dude it's uh
it's just hectic man it's hectic to like yeah I think it but naturally you feel
a certain way like
naturally you kind of know how to behave yeah you know I feel like and then you
can tell if somebody
else is upset yeah you know you go okay that was bad right yeah that was too
much and then you
apologize something you're asking him like qu