Name: Theo Von Checks In With Riley Mau
Uploaded: 2021-01-19T09:46:55.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Theo Von Checks In With Riley Mau' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-01-19. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Theo Von Checks In With Riley Mau' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-01-19. Transcript available.

Riley Mao is here. Riley Mao, how you doing, brother?
Good.
All right, man.
You know, it's been a while and people have been asking about you.
And I just wanted to know what the last we heard from you,
you had a love in your life and you had come across some love.
And do you remember that?
I do.
Okay, good.
And tell me about that, the girl.
Madison was her name.
And you guys, and it kind of fizzled quickly, I remember.
Is that something I'm recollecting well or no?
You're right.
Okay.
And take me through a little bit of that.
You guys had, how many dates did you go on?
Just one.
Okay.
Okay.
And then after that, what happened?
Things just didn't work out between us.
So we just, she went back to a different state
and we just never saw each other again.
And when you say that things didn't work out,
what does it mean?
Because you really felt, I felt like you were into this gal.
I was indeed.
But, you know, hey, things happen.
Like what?
I mean, I don't want to get into too much detail, obviously.
But, I mean, it's just, I mean, she basically just saw another guy.
She was interested in another guy.
Really?
And did you ever meet this guy?
No.
No, he's in her state as well.
Oh, it's easier.
Yeah.
So she's taking the easy way out, kind of hitting on a local guy.
Yeah.
Yeah, I hate when chicks do that.
Oh, he's in, he lives in my state.
I'm going to hook up with him, you know.
What else has been going on?
And how has love treated you since then?
Has there been anything new on the love horizon?
Not yet, but you will be the first to know.
What?
When something happens.
Oh, okay.
Nothing has happened.
No, not yet.
Okay.
And how were your holidays?
Did you enjoy it?
Did you do something?
What did you guys do?
You guys go to Hawaii?
No.
My parents did.
They're there right now.
Oh, wow.
Yeah.
They left me there.
They actually left me in California.
Went to Hawaii.
And now I'm here.
And do you guys celebrate Christmas?
Yes.
That's awesome, man.
Good.
I'm glad.
You got to adapt, man.
What else, man?
What else can, what else do we need to know?
I know it's been a while and I'm glad that you're here now and I'm glad to be
able to check
in with you.
Do you, do you, have you been alive?
What have you been, what is going on?
Have I been alive?
Yeah.
Yeah, I've been alive.
Okay.
And what else, man?
Give me a little bit more than that.
Give me, have you been alive?
You've been outdoors, you've been indoors?
I've kind of been staying a little indoors just because of COVID.
Okay.
And is that fear hitting your community a lot or a lot of people going down?
No, everyone's like just saying, screw it.
Let's go outside.
Do Vietnamese people get COVID a lot or no?
I have no idea.
Okay.
Keeping it close to the vest.
Riley Mao, you'll be, you're, you'll be in the Christmas talent extravaganza.
I will be.
Exciting.
Exciting.
I'm excited to see that, man.
And I'm grateful that, um, that you pop back in and I'm grateful that, you know,
hopefully
we'll hear from, hear more from you.
What kind of ladies, if there's a lady out there that really fancies a man like
yourself,
you know, a small, you know, not small, but a still growing, maturing, uh, malleable,
you know, uh, Eastern kind of, you know, Western kind of Eastern man, what,
what type of woman
do you think does, would deserve a man like you or is a good woman?
Um, I'm not, I'm not a guy to be too picky.
Um, I mean, just someone that, you know, treats a guy, right?
Simple as that.
Do you feel like there's, did Madison leave you feeling like there aren't good
women out
there or did you, did it leave you hopeful?
Or hopeless did you feel like it?
It, it made me hopeful.
Definitely.
Really?
Mm-hmm.
That's awesome, man.
And what, um, what do you, uh, do you envision like, uh, any future moves with
women?
Cause that was your first kiss, right?
Right.
And do you envision like, I'm sure you started to fantasize, oh, this is going
to go to
another place.
Like I've done this with women, you know, it's like you get the kiss and you
think you're
going to get, you know, a double up, you know, and things are going to go crazy
and
you get all these crazy, you know, ideas and you get sensuality creeps into
your body.
And next thing you know, you're just disgusted with yourself or touching
yourself.
But do you, uh, how did you get, like, how did you stop the fantasies and stuff?
How did you get away from that?
Um, I mean, honestly, I just said, or I just thought in my head, you know, hey,
she wasn't
the one.
Move on.
There's plenty of people out there.
There you go.
There's plenty of koi in the pond right there.
Maybe we'll find you a love out there, Riley.
You never know.
True.
Never know what happens.
And do you have any other, uh, any other words of wisdom?
No.
Riley now, ladies and gentlemen, I'm just sitting on your front porch,
wondering, how could
I be so far from my home?
And my mind is somewhere else, but when I find it, I'll patch up where it's
been blown.