Name: Spicing Things Up In The Bedroom
Uploaded: 2021-03-05T04:52:12.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Spicing Things Up In The Bedroom' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-03-05. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Spicing Things Up In The Bedroom' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-03-05. Transcript available.

Yo, what's up? My name's Damon. I'm calling you. I live in Everett, Washington.
Dirty Damon up there outside of Everett.
And I'm sorry for calling you Damon, but sometimes with Damon they say Dirty
Damon.
You know? Like Claude, they say Clean Claude.
But they don't say Clean Damon. Onward, brother.
23 years old. I just had a quick question.
So, I wanted you to get your opinion on something.
My girlfriend and I have been trying to spice things up in the bedroom, you
know?
Oh yeah, brother. Send pics. Just joking.
Don't write an article about that, some creep.
Yeah, brother. I feel you, man. Look.
When I was 23, baby, doing sex was really... God!
I mean, I felt like I was just sunbathing on the Lord's front porch, bro.
I mean, I just felt like my whole body fucking just was made out of damn just
penis meat, man.
I was just so... You were just so excited and fired up.
God, remember that?
I remember somebody would just accidentally bump into me and if she was cute, I'd
dampen that leg, baby.
You feel me? Onward, baby. Let's hear more, brother.
Thank you for calling, man. Praise God.
It's been a while. We've been going at it for a while and time to try some new
things.
So, she suggested that we come up with different characters and act like we're
cheating on each other.
But the problem is, is I'm not very good at this.
I mean, I come up with characters and I either break character or I just, I don't
know, don't know what to say.
And I think it's been a while since I've been in the games.
You know, hurting and trying to pick up girls isn't really strong.
But her, she's really good at it.
I mean, she's coming up with characters' names right off the bat, playing them
really well.
And, I don't know, I just want to be able to give her what she's giving me.
So, if you got any advice from me, I would love it.
Thanks for all you do, man.
Love the podcast. Gang, gang.
See you later, bro.
Thank you, man.
And thank you for the call and for asking me.
I mean, that's, first of all, that's exciting.
You're involved in an exciting world where you guys are, you know, dressing up
and doing different, you know, positions or something or whatever, you know.
Costume and all of that.
That's that booty Halloween when they say, let's get, you know, why don't you
do this or do that.
And it's kind of the one time I feel like if you want to do, I wouldn't say, if
you want to kind of go a little brown face, you might be able to do it in that
instance.
You know, if it's just you and your girl and you want to really kind of explore
some sexual, you know, adventures, you know, you do something.
I'm not saying, you know, get racial, but I'm saying, you know, maybe some Nescafe
or something on the cheeks, a little bit of, you know, I think you could go at
least a mocha.
And, you know, my name is no Dante.
My name is, you know, you know, Corinthian or something, you know, you could do
like, you could do a role play like that.
So it kind of gives you a chance to learn about other cultures.
You could read up on some of, you know, a certain culture's history, a black
history if you wanted to, if you want to go black and, you know, just approach
a girl.
Maybe, you know, everything we've been through, that kind of stuff.
And at least have like a, you know, have put on some poetic justice or
something in the background or like a save the last dance or something or
dances with wolves.
I'm trying to think of like a good kind of racially movie that promotes like,
you know, racial love, you know.
So, that could be something.
You could do Swedish, you know.
Swedish is kind of easy.
You get a thing of milk, a pail of milk, and then you run over there and y'all
kind of fuck a little.
But I'm trying to think of something you could do that would be more historical.
You could maybe do Native American.
You know, and she's like a white woman and you, you know, sneak in or something,
sneak in the window.
You know, you, you know, you don't attack or you, you know, you leave her a
note or something that says, I'm going to attack you.
You know, plan ahead, but you don't just, you don't just, you know, not call
for a couple days and then swing out of the damn cabinet.
You can't be like Indian in the cupboard.
You got to be, you know, Indian in the closet who left a note.
But I would go full throttle because if anything, the one thing it's going to
do, this whole thing is just going to create comfortability.
So many guys would love for their wife or their, you know, fiance, their French
wife or whatever to do a wig, you know, to do a, you know, you know, that crotch
wig, that strap on.
Probably not that, but they would love for their wife to do something unique,
but they's afraid to say it.
They're just afraid to say, hey, honey, put on the green wig, borrow Wanda's
fucking wig.
So for seven seconds of my life, it could feel, you know, I could feel that,
that vibe.
Like I'm getting up in that UFO, you feel me?
Praise God, man.
But also you could, um, what am I thinking about?
I'm just saying, and once you, if you're starting to create communication, dude,
that's fire.
Because then you guys are going to be able to do anything.
So many of us, we're just afraid to talk and say this or say that.
We're afraid of the judgment or what they're going to think or they're going to
tell people.
But man, to live outside of that fear and to dress up like the damn, you know,
like Saving Private Ryan or whatever.
Or to, you know, dress up like damn, uh, Jean-Claude Van Damme.
You and your girl dress up like Karate Man or something, you know, and just
kick each other till you ejaculate.
You know, there's just, you gotta think big picture, fam.
Hope you enjoyed that video and you can watch another.
And you can watch this one, you can watch this one.
Different options, different choices.
Some guy just brings you one option, not this guy.
Two options.
Watch one.
This one or this one.